Raven #5

Catchy nickname.

The covers for this comic book make me believe that Marv Wolfman didn't have any idea what the story was going to be in time to give the cover artists an idea of the story inside. Marv probably just said, "It'll be about Raven in high school or something! And she does magic and shit! I'll probably throw Trigon in there and he'll rape some stuff." The cover of Issue #6 will probably be Trigon with his dick in a mailbox.

The White Carnival is still kidnapping people. Raven still can't get a ticket to the carnival. Her Aunt continues to ask Raven if she believes in God. Oh, and Antt's name is spelled with two Ts. That's important for some reason. I think it's so Antt's fragile ego isn't destroyed by everybody's ignorance of her superior individuality.

While Raven does nothing, Aunt Alice discovers her niece is a Teen Titan.

Fake news! The Titans haven't even saved New York once!

Raven's friends hang out in the hospital doing nothing. Raven's cousin comes out to find her but winds up doing nothing but getting in trouble. Raven's Aunt watches Raven turn into a demon on television and does nothing. And Raven almost continues to do nothing until she finally gets into the White Carnival just before this issue ends.

What Did I Learn?
I learned this series should have been two issues long. Raven should have found the White Carnival at the end of Issue #1 and entered it at the beginning of Issue #2. Then Issue #2 would be whatever is going to happen in Issue #6 and Issues #2-5 wouldn't exist because nothing fucking happened in them anyway.

The Ranking!
-1!