Sunday, January 8, 2017

The Flintstones #7

This is the kind of joke that young people get pissed at if an older person makes it but young people are all "Right?!" if a young person makes it.

Young people are too young to be so defensive all the time. Learning to be defensive about anything you think is a criticism simply teaches you to believe everything is a criticism or a judgment. Then you become an old person who is too old to be so defensive all the time! Sometimes an observation is just a neutral observation! I sometimes feel that 95% of the anger and resentment carried around by us as a people is caused by our own preconceived notions and jumping to conclusions. You know how much energy is wasted in discussions where somebody says something and somebody else misunderstands the statement and gets angry at it? Then the first person has to clarify the statement to show how the second person got it wrong but then the second person, trusting confidently in their own thoughts about other things, doubts the first person's clarification. Because how did the second person read it as a terrible statement unless the first person didn't obviously mean what was so obviously horrible?! And even if the first person can thoroughly clarify the statement, the second person will remain suspicious and bitterly hold on to their first erroneous interpretation of the statement! So much wasted energy! It would be nice if somebody could be all, "Statement!" And the next person would be all, "Whoa, dude! Really?" And the first person would be all, "No, no! Clarified statement!" And the second person would be all, "Oh yeah! Okay! I see that. Thanks!" Instead we all have to stand our stupid ground being angry and feeling holier than the next person.

Now I'm mad at everybody and full of bitter resentment! You know what? I take it all back. I don't even want to get involved with people who feel they need to police everybody else. Next time you police somebody on the Internet, just remember what we all think of the real police! Fucking pigs!

I know a lot of you support the police blindly. But you racists aren't part of this current discussion so I knew I could exclude you.

Steve Pugh isn't doing the arts on this issue so I'm already disappointed. I didn't notice his name was missing from the cover. I just took one look at the first panel and thought, "Doodle poop." That's how I curse inside my own head, just in case God is listening. But I know he doesn't read the Internet because it's Satan's Playground, so I can say motherfucker and cunt all day long here.

Even though Pugh isn't arting this issue, I still want to put my filthy lips all over Betty's everything.

This week in Bedrock, The Flintstones learn about Hell! They also learn that the Great Gazoo is keeping tabs on all of them while protecting them from con artist aliens from outer space. Other stuff probably also happens since that's how this book works. It utilizes a thing called vignettes which isn't a crime fighting salad dressing like I first thought.

One thing that happens is the head priest of the Church of Gerald invents indulgences. He does it on accident so it's not like he was trying to get rich by cleansing people's sins so that they don't wind up in Hell. He just invented Hell to get people to fear doing bad things and then he suggested to a parishioner that maybe she do good things to make up for the bad things she's done. But she, like everybody, is way too busy for all that. And giving money is almost always an acceptable solution to one's problems. I mean, you would think that not doing the bad thing is the best solution. But sometimes you do bad things because you want to do them so badly and it's always nice if you can pretend the bad thing doesn't matter because you're giving money to offset your sin. Especially if you're, say, a big business and it would cost a lot of money to clean up all of the pollution created by your business. Everybody knows you don't want to be a major polluter, right? But what can you do?! You still have to make all of your money doing the thing you've been doing the exact same way forever. Changing takes too much time and money! But if not changing only takes money (and far less than you would be out if you changed to stop doing the bad thing), it's obviously the best choice!

It's so much cheaper to just not believe in sinning or a God!

Gazoo writes his report about humans but it's all "Blah blah blah lies and more lies and propaganda against humans!" And then there's another story happening about Fred being compassionate enough to help out some idiot who gets himself crushed at the quarry. It's too complex for me. I barely even noticed the criticism against art critics running through the story.

The Ranking!
This comic book is way too smart for me. It's like I'm reading a college essay written by a student who actually cares about their grade. But I'm smart enough to know that I want people to think I like smart things! So I totally love this comic book! It's my favorite. Whew, does it make you think! Also if you don't want to think because you're a typical comic book reader, you can probably jerk off to a couple panels of Betty Rubble. I can't say the same if you're into guys though because all the guys look like tree trunks wrapped in fur skirts. Oh man! That phrase "fur skirt" just got me horny for some reason! I mean, I'm going to go read some Shakespeare now!

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