Friday, January 13, 2017

The Lost Boys #3


I appreciate the continuity of this cover. The vampires are seen hanging on the ceiling of a cave as they slept last issue and this cover shows vampire feet capable of doing just that.

The Review!
This comic book is only called "The Lost Boys" so that fans of the movie know that this story takes place in that world. But the series is actually called "The Lost Girl." See what Tim Seeley did there?! The lost girl is Star from the movie. It turns out she has been working for a tribe of vampires called the Blood Belles in their search for the ancient vampire city of Xibalba. They sent her to destroy The Lost Boys so that the Blood Belles could swoop in and wake the mothers, ancient vampires who are probably the mothers of all vampires. It's also possible "mothers" is just a shortened name for "motherfuckers" because these are the baddest ass vamps that have ever existed. Except it's more likely they're the matrons of the vampire race, this being a story called "The Lost Boys: The Lost Girl". Who is more lost than little boys and girls without their mothers, right?

So in this issue, it turns out a vampire named Billy is running the Blood Belles and organizing the waking of the mothers. David is helping because there has to be some vampire connection to the movie. It isn't enough to have Sam and Michael and Star and the Frog Brothers and Lucy and Nanook and Grandpa Vampire Hunter. Those are just boring regular people. Billy knows the ritual to wake the mothers. She must sacrifice somebody with vampire blood (Michael who still has Max's blood running through him) and a male virgin (either one of the Frog Brothers will do). Will Star allow Billy to go through with it or will her love for Michael prove too strong?! We probably all know the answer to that unless Tim Seeley has really thought up some super groovy twist ending.

I'm pretty sure I'm going to overuse the phrase "super groovy" for a few weeks.

Also, Michael and Sam have met The Believer who's been made aware of new vampires in Santa Cruz. I mean Santa Clara. I mean San Dimas. I mean Santa Carla.


This is The Believer about to kill a vampire with his boner which I totally thought probably wouldn't work in my commentary for Issue #1. I stand corrected.

No change in ranking. I standby my assessment that this is for The Lost Boys fans. Although if they're too big of fans, they'll hate it because it isn't the original source material or by the people who made the original source material. Fans of pop culture are weird. Some fans like anything to do with the thing they like. But they're only middle of the road fans! If you're the biggest fan ever, you show it by being super duper critical of everything that isn't the original bit that made you a fan in the first place. So basically the bigger a fan you are of something, the more you hate everything that isn't an exact copy of the thing you love. In other words, people who declare themselves the biggest fan of something are usually the biggest dicks in the fandom.

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