Thursday, March 8, 2012

Grifter #2

Grifter meets up with his girlfriend Gretchen in a diner in Louisiana to try to convince her that he isn't crazy. Last issue, she really seemed like she was going to make him pay as she was headed toward the police station. I guess Nathan Edmondson, the writer, decided not to go that way. While he's speaking with Gretchen, a police officer walks in.

Grifter gets a feeling that this cop isn't a cop at all but one of the Daemonites. I wouldn't call that intuition at all. I would call that your new ability to identify the aliens even when they're wearing human skin. Just like Grifter can hear their thoughts all the time, now he can sense them in his presence. That isn't intuition. Or a gut feeling. Or a suspicion. That's the new alien DNA or blood or whatever in his body reacting to the presence of an alien with the same DNA. Or blood. Or whatever.

Intuition is such a fucking crock anyway! Intuition is usually just a stupid or imperceptive person reacting to but not consciously thinking about the evidence presented to them. Or it's just nonsense made up in the person's head. One of those so-called first impressions. And these are the hardest things to disprove once somebody gets it in their head that they've intuited something. Like when someone thinks someone is lying to them. They'll never be convinced without incontrovertible proof to the contrary because why would they think up something that was wrong? Especially any asshole who walks around telling other people that they have a great intuition. When I hear that, I have an intuition that that person is the dumbest fuck in the room.

Grifter picks a fight with the cop to prove to his girlfriend that the aliens actually exist. Here's the part where I say this story would have been better if Grifter really was insane and only believed he was hearing aliens. But I think I've kicked that dead horse in the teeth long enough. At one point in the fight, Grifter sets the cop on fire.

That's flour and fire.

This results in a huge explosion. Okay, not an explosion but a SSHOOOOM! He used barely a bag of flour which probably would have caused a flash fireball that lasted a second or two at best. But this?

Maybe if it were non-dairy creamer! I've seen Mythbusters too, Mr. Edmondson!

Oh but does it all work out? Of course not. The cop never transforms into some alien thing so his girlfriend just believes Cole Cash killed a cop. Which he did, I guess. But I think it was a Daemonite! But now not only his he Sawyer pulling con jobs, he's also become Kate running from the law with the people he loves claiming he's a killer!

Gretchen runs off. Cole steals a cop car. Gretchen steals some money and takes the last train to Gotham. Max shoots out the tire on Cole's car. Cole and Max have a shooting match with neither one willing to actually shoot the other one. And then Cole runs away into Issue #3.

Oh, also, the jerks at the Pentagon noticed a Daemonite gas beast leak out of the dead woman on the plane while looking at the plane's security camera. One of them mentions it looks like images from THE BLACK FILES! Whistle whistle whistle whistle whistle whoooo. WOOO WOOO whoo wooo WOO WOOOOO! Whistle whistle whistle whistle whistle whoooooooo. Whooo whoooooo. DUN!

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