Moments later, Hal Jordan was seen punching a homeless man to death.
I think it's also peppered into a lot of stories people tell about themselves because it just makes things sound so much more exciting. I think literally in everyday storytelling is akin to explosions in Michael Bay films. They're mostly unnecessary although they do help to distract from a poorly thought out story.
Let's begin the Cosmic Crisis Countdown Clock! This clock counts upward because I don't have any clue when the next cosmic crisis is coming. I just know that it's coming.
Cosmic Crisis Countdown Clock: 1 Issue
I'm going to begin it before even reading this comic book because I'm guessing the next crisis won't take place until after the big Convection event in April. Or whatever it's called. Maybe that will be the next cosmic crisis!
Why is Hal once again listening to the Guardians? These hippies have no authority over him!
Hal talks his way past Earth's sentry, Guy Gardner, and is allowed to go have a few beers out of costume. But Guy insists on joining him because Guy hasn't had a good brawl with Hal in a long time. And by "with," I mean either by his side or against him. I'm sure it doesn't really matter to Guy.
Don't be so quick to assume the designated driver thing, Guy! A Muslim is just as apt to drink as a Catholic is to diddle altar boys.
Next game, Barry moans about all the corpses still stinking up Central City after Forever Evil while Hal sits ignored at the bar. These are his best friends? I mean, Barry is his best friend and Guy is just some work acquaintance that nobody particularly likes? Can't they see their friend and work acquaintance is hurting?! His girlfriend was just stolen from him by the new kid! And by girlfriend, I mean the woman that he mostly ignored and treated like shit but whom he loved and even happened to tell her once or twice. Maybe.
On a side note, does Barry Allen give a shit about his secret identity? Does he not care if anybody notices him zipping around the pool table? Also, is this Future Barry Allen or regular old Barry Allen?!
Anyway, Barry spills some beer on some pilot who erupts into anger so Guy, logically, smashes him over the head with his pool cue.
And there it is!
I guess that's the space that would be filled by her cock and balls?
Then Carol flies away with her panties on fire.
Green Lantern #38 Rating: No change. Did I set the Cosmic Crisis Countdown Clock correctly? Guy Gardner starting a brawl probably doesn't count, right? And Hal and Carol breaking up for good (with possible hints of reconciliation down the road if Hal puts in some work on himself) doesn't matter a whit to the universe. So it looks like we're good for now! Maybe while Hal is on Earth, he'll even get a chance to battle some petty, C-List super villain! Or he'll just spend all of his free time over in Green Arrow helping out Oliver.