Deathstroke #3

So much blood! This issue must be super exciting!

When this series began, Deathstroke's kill count was at 600, give or take a few. Last issue, Deathstroke killed 300 men in one battle. So he's at least up to 900 kills. I'll give him another 30 for issue one even though that's a complete guess. Does that sound about right? So let's keep a Deathstroke kill count going!

Current Deathstroke Killcount: 930

This issue begins with Slade wandering through the snow with no grey hair and two eyes. It's hardly even the same character! Especially the way he stumbles and falls over from exhaustion. Slade can't be defeated by snow! What the hell is wrong with this comic book? I bet Tony S. Daniel is just preparing for a double splash page! Because you know how artists make the big money, right? By selling their original art of double splash pages! Fuck how well it fits into the story, man. Tony S. Daniel has bills to pay!

He could have at least fallen down so I could read the credits.

As he lies unconscious in the snow, he remembers his conversation with Joey when he found him in a force field being manipulated by Odysseus. I get why Joey calls his father Slade but I don't know why Deathstroke keeps thinking of Joey as Jericho. Or boy! Disrespectful!

Slade mentions Rose and I pretend not to flip the fuck out over the convoluted past history of Deathstroke and how in all of the different versions of Slade's New 52 life, only the Team 7 version treated Slade's family as if all three children knew each other. So I guess we're going with that version even though it made no sense at the time as Rose and Joey and Grant all reminisced about eating sandwiches together. Or something.

Hell, I don't think this even squares up with Deathstroke's Villains Month issue and that was just over a year ago.

Slade doesn't remember if he eventually freed Joey...er, I mean, Jericho or not. So Slade picks himself up out of the snow after the nice rest and remembrance to continue heading toward his super duper secret safehouse! It must still be full of weapons and Hot Pockets because even Slade Wilson himself almost died trying to find it! No way Odysseus got to this one!

But maybe Opossum did because he was way more powerful than Deathstroke.

No wait! Tony S Daniel decided Slade needed to have more memories after one more page of walking! He remembers saving his naked son and fighting through more of those Eye People.

Current Deathstroke Killcount: 934

I had to add them to the killcount because he only just remembered them.

While escaping, Joey is forced to use his powers against the scientists trying to restrain him.

Gross! He's naked!

Deathstroke teaches Joey Jericho an important lesson that all fathers should teach their children: "Sometimes we have to do bad things for good reason." Yes, yes! Exactly! Also, I sometimes do good things for bad reasons. Both are generally viable solutions to life's problems.

Joey Jericho and Slade discover Odysseus who is also naked. A lot of naked shit goes down in Deathstroke's memories! Odysseus claims that the three of them together make the most powerful power ever. But before they get the power flowing, does Slade have to get naked as well?

Apparently Odysseus is Deathstroke's father. I guess he died and was reborn with Joey Jericho's help since the last time we saw Slade's dad which was in a hospital bed in Gary, Indiana in Deathstroke #8. Slade hates his father because his father once sold him to pay off a ten thousand dollar debt. There were other reasons he hated him too but that one kind of stands out. Deathstroke has a short conversation with his father before getting in the final word.

Current Deathstroke Killcount: 935

This family really has some serious trust issues.

That's the end of Slade's memory. He makes it to his safehouse and thinks about how he hasn't seen his father since he was twelve. Lies! I read Deathstroke #8 and Slade most certainly saw his father! It's the entire reason Slade Wilson does what he does! To prove his father wrong! It's a stupid reason but it was right there in Deathstroke #8! DC Comics, you suck at reboots. I mean, you're pretty good at rebooting over and over again. But how could you fuck up Deathstroke and his history so badly in the space of three years? Fucking imbeciles. And did you even ask Tony S. Daniel to familiarize himself with the past Deathstroke book? I assume you didn't since why should a writer base anything he's writing on what has actually happened to the character. It's not like the main reason people love comic books is the long history of the characters! Oh wait, you already killed that long history when you began The New 52 anyway. So I guess dumping Deathstroke's history three or four more times since then shouldn't be such a big deal.

But has Tony S. Daniel ever read any story with Deathstroke?! I don't think he knows that Jericho's actual name is Joseph!

The only reason Slade wandered so far out in the snow is to get a hidden satellite phone. But somebody beat him to it! The guy who he trusted completely right up until Red Fury said, "Are you sure you can trust him completely?" And then Slade was all, "You're right! Ew! I hate that guy!" That guy is Bronze Tiger! And they wind up fighting! At least Bronze Tiger doesn't have the head of a tiger like in Red Hood and the Outlaws. That's greeeeeaaaaat!

What does that mean? "Too good for your own sake"? Does it mean he's going to beat himself?! That's pretty good!

Red Fury shows up to put an end to the fight...for now! I don't know where he came from but a VTOL follows after him, so they all load up and head to some cozy chalet to make plans against Odysseus. Who I guess isn't dead even though Slade shot him in the eye. Unless that wasn't Odysseus. It also might not have been his father. Also, Joey Jericho may have been Odysseus.

What makes Red Fury think Jericho is the only one that can kill Odysseus? Doesn't anybody want to see the scientific reasons for this theory? Or are they just going to try again and hope this assumption holds true? I remember earlier this issue when Deathstroke said he doesn't hope!

Red Fury has learned that Joey Jericho is headed to Gotham City. So now it's time for Slade to go battle The Batman! Again! Remember the time they fought early on in The New 52? Of course you don't! Let me remind you: it was a dark and stormy night. Two-Face had just declared that he was One-Face. Some hot piece of ass calling herself The White Rabbit was thonging it up all over Gotham. Batman was flying his Batplane over Gotham Bay when Deathstroke, completely fucked up on Venom for no reason at all, drops out of the sky and onto the Batplane! Holy shitballs, Batman! What a crazy day! They fought then they fell out of the sky then Deathstroke quietly disappeared from Batman's life. Although on revisiting the story, I think maybe The White Rabbit teleported Deathstroke onto the Batplane with her finger guns. That still doesn't explain what Deathstroke was doing there and on Venom.

Anyway, I think Batman is probably too busy to deal with Deathstroke. So somebody else is waiting for him in Gotham.

Oh look! It's a fifteen year old dressed as Harley Quinn. How adorable!

Deathstroke #3 Rating: No change. There are so many things I don't like about this comic book but I can't really fault it too much on starting Deathstroke's history over. I can fault Daniel for the lousy plot but it's really not much worse than most average comic book plots. Maybe it's better but I can't see that it's better because of all that messed up stuff about not having seen his dad even though he did see his dad recently. And why doesn't Slade call his son Joey? Even when he thinks about him, he thinks of him as Jericho. And I hate that they youthed Slade up! Well, at least Daniel's art is nice to look at. It pains me to say that because I tend to concentrate on his flaws and weak points. I suppose if you're new to Deathstroke in The New 52, and you're one of those people that always thought when reading Deathstroke, "This would be more enjoyable if he weren't an old fucking man!", then you'll probably enjoy this comic book a lot. People die and shit, so that's cool, right?