Green Lantern Corps #7

Now it's time for the sad.

Last issue, John Stewart killed a member of the Green Lantern Corps to keep the universe safe. He killed one person for the greater good so I think it's time for another John Stuart Mill joke! You'll have to come up with it on your own though. This is a participatory comic book commentary.

The first five pages of this issue show the ceremonial funeral honoring a Green Lantern killed in the line of duty. I don't know if this ceremony has ever been shown before but I'd imagine it has been since hundreds of Green Lanterns have probably been killed over the last sixty years or whatever. And I bet, at times, even important ones that readers liked have died! He's made into a Green Light Image and placed in the Tower of Green Images which is probably actually called something different and more reverential.

Who's the guy in the Burberry, tie, and kneepads?

Guy Gardner is called in to have a meeting with the Guardians of Oa. I guess they're taking a break from developing their new Universal Police Force. There's always time for a tongue lashing of the subordinates!

I like Gardner's reaction to his lousy superiors. At least, this first reaction.

The Guardians act upset that Guy killed two prisoners while using them as bombs. But the Guardians are actually upset that Guy went against their rules and took two prisoners from their science cells without their permission. Now, that isn't actually in the text but that's their fucking nature, the bastards. You know that's what's driving them crazy. But Guy's defense is just lame for all the reasons I explained earlier.

Really? Every child was going to fight against the American soldiers?

I already explained why the whole World War II analogy falls apart. I have to wonder if Guy would have made the connection at all if the stupid Sinestro members hadn't been calling themselves by the names of the bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. He's not that bright. Until the writer needs him to be that bright! And then he's Mr. Smart Chops!

While Guy Gardner chose to end the lives of two murderous Sinestro Corps members to save the lives of many Keepers and Lanterns, John Stewart chose to end the life of one Green Lantern to save the lives of, perhaps, the entire universe. Of course the amount of lives he may or may not have saved is theoretical while the Green Lantern is actually dead. And that's what John is going to have to deal with. Guy seems okay with his decision though.

For the greater good, bitch!

John is busy packing up Kirrt's things to send home to his family. Kirrt is the name of the Green Lantern I've been refusing to learn. It's not like he's a real person who gave his life to help make the universe a better place! He's just a made up character! I don't have to learn his name if I don't want to! And so what if he was a Green Lantern! What the fuck are these Space Cops trying to do anyway? The universe is a big place being infinite and all. Every time they help somebody it's like they're helping nobody because it's just one good deed out of an infinite number of random accidents or catastrophic disasters or evil megolmaniacal space Gods killing innocent otter people! They can't stop sadness! John Stewart is a Green Lantern and he can't even stop his own sadness!

You didn't put it on the report because you didn't want others to see that Kirrt had been broken and shamed.

What if Batman were put into this situation? He wouldn't have killed Kirrt so how would he have saved the day? He would have let the Keepers get the code. Then he would have escaped as they were firing up the Stargate. And then he'd throw his Batarang into the control panel, shorting out the device! And after that, he would have delayed the Keepers long enough for Superman to come in and throw them all in a big cage.

Except Batman did shoot Darkseid with the intent to kill him, right? Or was the Magic Bullet supposed to just immobilize him? Oh, who cares! That was an entirely different universe. Kind of.

John Stewart escorts Kirrt's body back to his home planet of Lorror in Sector 1346. Kirrt's parents take the news as many parents have over many thousands of years and probably more if we're speaking about alien cultures on alien planets across the whole of time. But Kirrt's younger, mentally awkward brother thinks he can bring his brother back from the dead.

Of course he died a hero. He did everything the Green Lantern Corps asked of him to protect the universe. It's not like he ever killed an innocent man or a teammate!

And that's how that ends. John makes a grave for Kirrt that says, "Beloved Son and Best Brother Ever" It also mentions he was a Green Lantern but not that he was a coward that tried to betray the universe and get everyone killed. That's John and Vandor's secret!

Green Lantern Corps Issue #7 Rating: +1 Ranking. One thing I like is how different Guy and John are. I disagree with John killing Kirrt but everyone does what they think is best in the moment. Time is a ruthless bitch and we all do our best, moment by moment. Okay, not all of us do. Some of us do the worst. And others do as little as they can possibly get away with. But, you know, I think John did what he felt he needed to do at that exact instant. I also don't agree much with Guy. But then Guy is a marine and a patriot and a blow hard. I've always liked the character though! Tomasi is doing a pretty good job with both of these guys. I can't wait to see how he writes G'nort now!