Thursday, May 17, 2012

Voodoo #7

I've heard people say "Less is more" and I think I finally get it! Less Voodoo would be more enjoyable!

Voodoo has just killed a dozen Daemonites in the War Council's ship as she searches for answers. Another guard tries to take her away and she kills that one too.

Oh fucking just kill her already.

So the Daemonites apparently made a special hybrid that they can't kill. They also futzed with Grifter in some way (is he also a clone?! Perhaps he's like Priscilla Kitaen with some powers because he was experimented on and there's a Grifter/Daemonite Hybrid out there like Priscilla's Voodoo? I'm pretty sure that has to happen now) and they can't kill him either. I think these Daemonites need to knock off their genetic experiments before they eliminate their entire race.

The High Commander of the War Council decides to answer Voodoo's questions because the Daemonites don't seem to have a weapon aboard their War Ship that can stop her. He takes her into a room with Superboyesque clone tanks and gives her a story.

Oh bullshit.

"When you first came to Earth?" You mean thousands of years ago? When did you exactly notice humans turning into super heroes? Do you consider The Shining Knight a super hero? That's just something you noticed right off when you first came to Earth then. And why did you first come to Earth? Was it to conquer it? Why are you here? Why have you been hiding in the shadows for so long? Maybe he means when this particular War Ship first came to Earth about five years ago! I'll buy that.

Thanks for the summary, Josh!

After the explanation, the War Council Leader sets all of the Voodoo failed experiments on Voodoo! She just killed dozens of Daemonites that are supposed to be really hard to kill (unless you're Grifter) and now she just has to fight three shape-shifting lizard things? No problem! She's been written into invulnerability at this point!

Meanwhile, back on Earth, Priscilla Kitaen (the original Voodoo) is pissed off because nobody rescued her quickly enough. But she agrees to help Black Jack and Fallon catch Voodoo so that she can appear more magnanimous and caring than they are.

Meanwhile meanwhile back on the ship, Voodoo has blown a hole in the side of the ship (with WHAT?!) so her developmentally retarded clone siblings would be sucked out and into space.

Or it's a new writer that didn't like the limit Marz had set.

Voodoo kills her clones but wishes it were her dying instead. No she doesn't. She just killed all three of them with her own hands. Just jump out the hole you blew in the side of the ship (HOW DID SHE DO THAT?!) if you really want to die. But she doesn't want to. Instead, she kills all of the clones being made in all of the tubes on the ship. And then she threatens to destroy the Daemonite ship as well (please do it. Please. I'm already bored to tears by them). But the Daemonite Lord has a different offer.

Aha! The hybrids are LGBT! And now Voodoo will lead them all!

Voodoo accepts the deal and the Daemonites send her back to Earth exactly where she was when she left. And it just so happens Fallon, Black Jack, and Priscilla are there snooping around for clues! The confrontation goes something like this:

Priscilla: You ruined my life!
Voodoo: Oh, you.
Priscilla: You're not real!
Voodoo: I'm real.
Priscilla: Why did you do this to me?
Voodoo: I wondered why someone did this to me as well but I got over it pretty quickly when I was assured that I still believed in the Daemonites and I also go a pay raise.
Priscilla: What?
Voodoo: The Daemonites never loved you!
Black Jack: Calm down ladies!
Voodoo: I'll kill you!
Black Jack: Oh, I highly doubt that!


Voodoo Issue #7 Rating: -1 Ranking. I did not enjoy this issue in the least. After nearly every piece of dialogue, I released an exasperated exhalation of breath. It was mostly awful. That's reflected in my commentary because I truly didn't know what to write or what to think at times. My hope is that Voodoo just kills her original and the comic follows Voodoo as she tries to destroy the Earth. And of course she'll end up in a sexual relationship with Grifter at some point as well. Inevitable.

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