The Fury of Firestorm The Nuclear Men #6

I like that the explosion left a Firestorm logo crater. Nice one!

Ronniestorm and Jasonstorm were both convinced to join up with Zither Tech. Zither Tech is the big bad guy corporation and now they've become its pawns. They're just idiot high school students who had a lot of cash and the possibility of fame (which brings girls (and guys for Ronniestorm)) thrown at them and they just couldn't resist. They thought their first mission would be a public relations cakewalk and instead it turned into a giant catastrophe as a complete stadium was blown to smithereens. Now they're going to have to deal with their choices like the high school students they are. "It wasn't my fault!"

Ronniestorm and Jasonstorm ask why and yell and cry and scream and flip the fuck out because about two thousand people were just killed by a rogue Firestorm blowing himself up at a concert. But the comic is only twenty pages long so one of them is going to have to get them to concentrate on putting a good story together because I don't want to read twenty pages of "Oh the Humanity."

Unless maybe it were written by a better writer than Gail Simone.

Actually, it is about him. And it's about you as well, Jasonstorm. The 2,000 people killed are dead. Their experience is over. Demean them or pray over them, it's all the fucking same thing to them now. Piss on their ashes, actually. And it still isn't about them. But it is about you and why the fuck are you pissing on the ashes of these innocent victims, you disgusting fuck? See! You're alive and it is about you now. So deal with it and don't fucking think praying is going to be any better than flipping the fuck out.

The rogue Firestorm may have turned himself into a bomb to kill all of these people, but he certainly didn't die. He's currently watching Jasonstorm and Ronniestorm's reactions.

Oh, look who is holier than thou about the violence religion causes. After what you just did, I'm not sure you're in any position to judge, Douchestorm.

Oops. Excuse the fuck out of me. That's Pozhar, the Russian Firestorm. Carry on with your judging religion! Everything's cool between us. You hunt Firestorms, right? Well, I know almost everybody ever is practically a Firestorm at this point, but I'm not one of them. So carry on killing the two teenaged American Firestorms.

Pozhar blasts Ronniestorm and Jasonstorm with a Firestorm Fireball which simply pisses them off, especially Ronniestorm.

Hey now! I just got done apologizing to this guy! Don't go including me and 300 million other people in your insult!

Pozhar turns off Ronniestorm's power somehow. Probably as easily as turning stone into butterflies. He also subdues Jasonstorm with vines which seems really weak on Jasonstorm's part. I don't think he was trying too hard to save Ronnie. But the two high schoolers do convince Pozhar that they weren't behind the bombing but were trying to stop it instead. Pozhar believes them but mostly because he senses that these two Firestorms knew Stein and were created with legitimate Firestorm technology. Pozhar flies away but warns them he'll be back if they act up.

Afterward, Ronnie and Jason have a slight disagreement about what to do next.

This is Jason's opening argument in every debate.

So they fight a bit and Jasonstorm Narration Boxes during the whole thing. The bottom line: they don't like each other and never will. They will never work together. They hate each other. They'll never see eye to eye. BFF never. Ronniestorm flies off to chase down Pozhar and Jasonstorm reports back to Zither Tech.

And then she tells him to run because the military is coming to kill him. And the reporters pull up at the same time and run out of their van ready for an exclusive. Idiots. I even hate fictional comic book news reporters!

The Fury of Firestorm The Nuclear Men #6 Rating: No change. I was really hoping for a lot more here than Ronnie and Jason fighting Pozhar and then Ronnie and Jason fighting each other and now, lo and behold, Ronnie and Jason on the run and blamed for the terrorist attack. Trite. Not very exciting. No Ronnie's mom.