Legion of Super-heroes #7

If one Legion of Super-heroes member dies, how many are left? Infinity!

The old man from last issue defeats Chameleon Boy. He does this because he has a mandate from heaven.

Hee hee. Mandate.

Dragonwing spits fire on a bunch of Red Dragons and spits acid on a bunch of Red Dragons and tells them how she deserves to be a Legionnaire.

Listen to me. If I don't care about this comic book, why would anybody else care to read what I'm writing about it? What is it about this comic that just puts me to sleep? Let's work through its faults.

#1. Too many characters. The comic only has 20 pages of story and it has to have over 25 different characters. I know at least fifteen were introduced in the first issue alone and there have been plenty more since then. How am I supposed to develop any kind of attachment to any of these characters when they get so little story time? I can't even remember how they relate to each other from one issue to the next.

#2. It takes place 1000 years in the future. I don't give a shit about the DC Universe 1000 years in the future! It has no relationship at all to the other 51 comics. And while I don't really need the comics to interact (and definitely don't need them to cross over as much as DC has been doing), I at least need their to be some kind of tether between them.

#3. The characters don't have time to develop distinct personalities. And it doesn't help that they're all named Lass and Boy and Kid and Girl and Lad!

#4. The writer can easily choose characters to use based on what problems will develop within the story. Maybe this shouldn't be a fault as a writer is free to write anything he wants. But it just seems that with the wide array of powers inherent in the Legion, they heroes can accomplish just about anything.

#5. There are probably more problems but I'm even bored trying to figure out the problems with this comic. I'm sure there are Legion of Super-heroes fans. Maybe someday I'll be one of them! After I slog through 100 issues of this comic, maybe they'll grow on me!

Although, I do like the Substitute Legion of Super-heroes! They can be entertaining.

Meanwhile, in space and headed to Earth, Brainiac 5 convinces Mon-el to hold another election to determine a new leader for the Legion of Super-heroes. Brainiac 5 wants the position and believes he should have it since he's the smartest. I bet someone other than Brainiac 5 or Mon-el wins!

Elsewhere, the Dominators are cloning an army of Daxamites mixed with Dominator blood so that they will lose their allergy to lead and other heavy metals. Basically they'll have an army of supermen. And then they'll destroy the Legion! Yay! Go Dominators!

Here's a picture for your viewing pleasure.

The fight in China continues and since Chameleon Boy and Dragonwing aren't doing a very good job, Dream Girl, who can see the future and can tell that they're going to lose, sends Comet Girl and Harmonia to help out. I don't imagine Dream Girl would have sent a couple of Legionnaires that were going to lose the fight, so I think this one is about to wrap up.

Really? The true mandate of heaven? This is like arguing about who has the fastest unicorn.

Harmonia stops Phoenix somehow. I don't know exactly how because Harmonia's Legionnaire Super Power Box says this: "Abilities: Natural Elemental." What does that mean?!

And that's all wrapped up. Dragonwing's sister is sent to prison to escape at a later date and cause trouble. Phoenix is also wrapped up and put away. He'll be back around issue 34 when it's time for another Dragonwing story. And Chameleon Boy ends on a pouty note because he almost died. Boo hoo!

Legion of Super-heroes Issue #7 Rating: -1 Ranking. I can't just keep letting it tread water because I don't feel I know how to judge it. It's boring! Plus I gave it a +1 a few issues ago because it was actually entertaining. So I know I can be entertained by it! 1 good comic out of 7 isn't so bad, right? That's a better ratio than Grifter!