Now I want a scarf that looks like a snake.
I wish I enjoyed that Halloween story more than I actually did because I'm about to read the scariest thing I'll read on Halloween today: a Scott Lobdell jam!
Mmm. Scott Lobdell jam.
This issue, Scott Lobdell decided to change things up. He still wastes the first page of twenty with a boring, splash page that probably shouldn't even be called a splash page since it's more like a still life. So that's not different. But he does wait until the second page to Narration Box, "My name is Jason Todd." It also means that he wastes the second page with another non-kinetic splash page where nothing is actually happening. This is the equivalent of changing your spacing and font size on college essays. Now Scott Lobdell only has eighteen pages to write after having thrown away two pages with a few Narration Boxes that should have only lasted half a page.
This is one of the things that is wrong with Lobdell. You can tell he's not writing because he loves writing or else he'd pack in as much story as he possibly could in the meager twenty pages DC Comics gives the creators. Instead, he wastes as much space as possible, padding and extending his scripts with bullshit just to get the job done. He seems to like the idea of being a writer better than actually being a writer and doing the work. And he probably thinks he's pretty good at his job since he made tons of money writing the X-men. I never read that shit although many people promise me that he wrote some really good stuff back then. If he did, he blew his load in the nineties and now he's resting on his nice, soft laurels full of X-men money. But I can't judge him on the stuff he wrote which I never read. His Hardy Boys Adventures might be where he's putting all of his effort but I'll probably never read those because everything I've read in The New 52 with his name on it has been asshole flavored. Plus, it's the Hardy Boys.
The story begins with Roy Harper dying of burn wounds. If he recovers, hopefully he'll have lost his ability to Narration Box.
I bet I won't believe the story! I certainly won't believe that DC published it!
The two decide that they need to get rid of the body and thankfully Roy Harper is a super genius that can invent anything that Scott Lobdell needs for his shitty plot to keep moving. So Roy developed an arrow that reads the DNA of a victim and then explodes but only destroys everything with the victim's DNA on it. Including his clothing. But not the grass that had his blood on it.
Why did you talk her out of her kill in the first place? Sexist assholes. Also, it's Twat Lobo. Get it right.
Back in the hospital and back to the present, Oliver Queen visits Roy.
I don't get it. Where is a place he can't reach? On a high shelf?
Back to Jason Todd's story before he runs afoul of copyright infringement (you know? Suddenly having the name Assholster when that name already belongs to a member of the Graveyard Faction), the Outlaws begin their search for the terrorist that tried to destroy Washington, DC, which, I'm assured by the editor, happened back in Red Hood and the Outlaws #33. Now I'm angry that I was forced to remember that issue!
Oh, you're not, Starfire. You are not the only one.
When is Roy Harper going to burn up like a jack-o-lantern?!
The Outlaws stumble upon a shack with a basement full of thugs boosted by some contraption full of drugs latched to their ankles. Jason Todd, having no experience with the dangers of muscle boosting drugs (why would he, amirite?!) or their possible horrible side effects, decides to remove a contraption from one thug to place on himself. Um. Is he not worried about sharing needles? I'm not even worried about the side effects from whatever drug he's injecting into his system now! I'm worried that Jason now has AIDS or Hepatitis C!
Kori flies off but not far enough way that Roy can't reach her on foot while running through a swamp. It's like she wanted to get caught shooting up with Space Heroin! Or she wanted to make sure Roy was nearby when she took off like a rocket and burned the ever loving Jesus out of him.
Ha ha! I don't even feel bad for laughing. Fuck Scott Lobdell's Roy Harper!