I bet the next cover has Fire in a mirror image pose!
I just made up those "some people." It's a trick other people whom I've made up use to manipulate still more made up people into thinking that there is a debate that doesn't really exist. But the existence of the debate helps convince the still more made up people that they had better start acting or else the world is going to get really fucked up or something. I think it's called a scarecrow or something.
I make stuff up all the time to suit my purposes. It's easy to do and nobody on the internet knows about checking facts. Well, they sort of know about it. But they always suspect that somebody with more time has already done the fact checking and that they wouldn't have heard the thing they're hearing unless it were already true because why would people pass on false knowledge?
People not on the internet also don't know how to check facts. It's just that they don't see as many fake facts in the same amount of time. Oh, to be sure, the percentage of incorrect facts non-internet users hear is probably higher but they just aren't bombarded with as many. Especially if they've taken a shotgun and blown out the tube on their television. I'm assuming that if they aren't on the internet, they still own an old fashioned television. And a shotgun.
As some of you may have noticed already, I'm rambling and Howard Porter isn't doing the art for this issue of Justice League 3000. That's too bad because I like his style. And his mustache.
Last issue, the Justice League 3000 were reunited with Preboot Ice (as much as you can call it a reunion since the Justice League 3000 are kind of zombie reanimated clone type things of the originals). This issue, everybody wants to know what Ice has been up to for one thousand years. And Etrigan was summoning Fire (probably the Preboot version as well) to join the fun. And Preboot Blue Beetle and Preboot Booster Gold were also out there somewhere. So it looks like fairly soon (probably June?), Keith Giffen and J.M. DeMatteis will once again be writing Justice League International. Except in the future. I wonder if they're going to dig up the Dibnys? And Oberon! And L-Ron!
That's Oberon! They remember Oberon!
Knowing Giffen and DeMatties, my supposition is actually probable!
Ariel asks Ice to clear up the last thousand years of history because obviously she must have been paying attention to all of it. I bet the focus of her story is how she and Bea had a falling out over one of those stupid things friends sometimes have fallings out over. And then they just stopped talking and lost contact with each other and Ice went to sit in an ice castle while Fire went to Hell.
But before Ice can clear up all of this wacky doodle nonsense, we need to see how Booster and Beetle are doing.
Looks like they're having one of those fine messes they enjoy so much.
Ice was not rescued that time but later Fire came back and traded her life for Ice's freedom. After many fruitless attempts to rescue Fire from Hell, Ice gave up on everything and locked herself away in a stasis pod. She was only awakened by The Great Disaster which apparently destroyed much of Earth. That was probably The Flash's fault for trying to change time and save his mom. Again.
One of her adventures with Kamandi after waking up from stasis. This looks like it was probably only a two issue Kamandi story.
Ice has some other adventures where she defeats the Atomic Knights because they're dicks. Then she escapes Earth in a space ark with a bunch of talking animals and left them on another planet while she headed to Camelot Nine. Her animal planet is probably where Captain Carrot and his crew live. And then after seemingly finding peace, Etrigan came to visit. For some reason she wasn't happy about it. Come on, Ice! It's Etrigan! How can two of my favorite characters not be friends?!
See? Fire learned to love him! You should too, Ice!
Meanwhile, Fire never once appears in this comic book (except in flashbacks) even though she was kind of promised at the end of last issue. Liars! Bastards! But Etrigan has another recognizable old friend at his side who's revealed on the final page.
Yes! Out of all the DC Characters across all time, Etrigan was the one to defeat Darkseid! That's my boy!