Birds of Prey #20

Well at least maybe she'll be able to hit something with that gun.

Last issue hit us all over the head with a huge twist shocker that Starling is a big douchebag. Although she's been all over the place in this comic so far. She loves Black Canary. She hates Black Canary. She doesn't know Katana's husband is in her sword. She knows Katana's husband is in the sword. She knows Black Canary killed her husband. She doesn't know Black Canary killed her husband. She's always drunk. She's never not drunk. Okay, so that's been consistent. But now that she's betrayed the team, I have to believe that she's actually betraying the betrayal of the team. Or, you know, she's still loyal. One of those ways was a much clearer way to phrase it.

The issue begins with Black Canary meditating on betrayal. "It's the bread and butter of Black Ops!" "Everybody betrays everyone eventually especially when you have inconsistent writers like Duane Swierczynski!" "Starling was such a fine, upstanding, decent, loyal friend who never constantly accused me of murdering my husband and selling her out to hit squads! I can't believe this!"

Why does she mention being Black Canary? Is one of her super powers to not be duped by double agents?

Strix is trapped in ice and Starling has the rest of the Birds covered with her pistols. I don't know why they don't charge her and disarm her! Nobody but the wall behind them is in danger of being shot. Black Canary decides to talk it out to give Babs some time to cut Strix out of the ice. But talking it out probably isn't such a good idea because Starling actually raises some pretty good points that I'm sure Black Canary will ignore simply because her feelings are hurt. And fuck working with someone who just hurt your feelings!

Meanwhile Condor simply stands around looking stupid.

Black Canary refuses to work with a crazy person like Mister Freeze. A crazy person like Katana? Oh, sure. No problem! She just talks to her sword, stabs people, and blows up hotels filled with guests. But at least she doesn't go around pretending she can eventually resurrect her spouse! Umm, hmm. Now I'm not exactly sure why Black Canary won't work with Mister Freeze! I guess the only reason left is because he has a prick! Sexist!

The lab coats in Owl Masks try to make a break for it and Starling shoots the wall around them to get them to stop. It doesn't work. Also, it isn't just that she's a lousy shot this time although I would have liked to leave it at that if I didn't think everyone on the internet would correct me. Condor uses his stupid mental powers to stop the stupid bullets from hitting the wall. Big help that guy is! At least the walls won't need any repair.

While the heroes and villains battle for who gets to take down the Court of Owls, the Court of Owls' lab monkeys make a break for it. Mr. Freeze traps Condor and Black Canary behind a wall of ice and Condor is useless to manipulate that much ice with his telepathy. Or perhaps it only works when things are flying at him very quickly. And Black Canary refuses to yell at the ice because she might hurt someone. On the other side of the ice, Starling continues to try to explain how they could all work together to stop the Court of Owls. But nobody wants to work with her now because she's a fucking jerk that lied to them and liars need to stop lying already even if it means The Court of Owls thugs get away.

The mantra of The New 52!

While the Court of Owls' scientists retreat, one of them takes the time to phone the Grandmaster to let him know that the mute Talon has returned. The Grandmaster is just relaxing at home in his Owl Mask because I guess they never take them off? He tells her to make sure Mary Turner (Strix!) doesn't leave. So now the Court of Owls' scientists need to stand and fight or else the Grandmaster will be angry. And then it will be the Night of the Talons all over again!

It turns out Mister Freeze is only using his indignity as a cover to hunt the Owls so he can learn one of their secrets, most likely one that will help restore his dead wife that he doesn't want to remember is dead.

It's stem cells pulled from the corpses of liberal babies spawned by Satan in unholy black rituals learned from playing Dungeons and Dragons and ignoring the wisdom of Ronald Reagan.

Oy! I knew it had something to do with Dungeons and Dragons!

Now that Mr. Freeze has the secret that he believes will bring back his wife (probably. Isn't that the only reason he does everything?) even though I'm pretty the process only works if you stick the electrum in a person's teeth while they're alive, he's ready to leave with Starling. I wonder why Starling owes him a favor? What's there a connection? Why does Starling have a stronger connection with Mister Freeze than with Black Canary? I believe it has something to do with all of the Wildstorm characters being written like crap since Flashpoint merged them into the DC Universe. They may or may not have been written like crap before that but I wouldn't know having read nothing but The Authority.

Starling gets away because Black Canary screams at her and the scream collapses the hallway Starling was running through although it doesn't hurt Starling at all. I guess because flesh is malleable while stone is rigid. I think Jesus or Einstein or Kant or Brandi Carlile said something about being more like the willow than the oak and this explains that somehow. And Starling plugged her ears with her fingers, so that kept her head from exploding. The important thing to the story is that she gets away to be dealt with later. And the really important thing to this story is that stupid fucking Condor is still alive.

The team splits up because Strix needs to get out of the cold and into the sun to heal, so Batgirl climbs out of the building with her while Canary and Condor go after Mister Freeze. And then Batgirl and Strix run into a very special guest star for next issue!

Calvin Rose! Okay, okay. I guess the guest star isn't all that special.

Birds of Prey #20 Rating: No change. Man. I liked Sword of Sorcery so much that I'm really disappointed with Christy Marx's Birds of Prey right now. I'm still hoping it eventually gets better since Marx was left with a confusing mess with some really awful characters when she took over. I suppose I just have to give it time! I hate giving things time!