In retirement, The Swamp Thing can watch what Woordrue gets up to. He also knows what Woodrue is thinking. Being a retired Avatar is a lot like being an omniscient narrator.
Or a lot like my aunt who can't shut up while watching a movie and thinks she's offering helpful suggestions to the protagonist when she's not asking me unanswerable questions about what's going to happen.
Jason Woodrue (also known as The Seeder but that title's a bit too porny for me. Although, "Woodrue" isn't exactly not porn material) has decided that the best times the world has ever known was when one of the Three Colored Kingdoms was completely fucking out of control and decided to destroy the other colored kingdoms. So his first order of business is to take out Buddy Baker.
Good thing Woodrue didn't go after the real Avatar of the Red! Even with her little kitty cat's help, I'm not sure Maxine is ready for this kind of fight.
While Woodrue battles Buddy Baker, Alec Holland, Retired Avatar, studies Woodrue's past. Because as a previous Avatar, he gets to know everything Woodrue knows just as Woodrue gets access to all of the memories of past Avatars. So Holland remembers that time at Reed College in Portland, Oregon, when Woodrue met a professor that somehow guessed the mysteries of The Green by reading The Lord of the Rings and other ancient histories. Woodrue believes him because this is a comic book and characters need The Wise Man to tell them things that nobody can easily find out. But this is Reed college and two guys are talking about "The Green Man," so if this weren't a comic book, this entire conversation would really just be them feeling each other out and making sure they're both into pot before they offer each other some chronic herb.
The Professor: "So, Jason, you're interested in plants and consciousness, are you?"
Jason: "Yeah, Prof! Have you ever heard plants thinking?"
The Professor: "Ha ha! That's a theory most people aren't quite ready for. But are you ready to know it?"
Jason: "Fuck yeah! You know it, Pro!"
The Professor: "Have you ever heard of 'The Green Man'?"
Jason: "Have I! You mean like fucking Tom Bombadil and shit right?"
The Professor: "So, you like The Lord of the Rings, do you? Especially the Hobbits and their penchant for smoking?"
Jason: "If only we could become The Green Man, right Professor?"
The Professor: "Say no more, Jason. Say no more. Although, what would you think about becoming The Brown Man?"
Jason: "Whoa whoa whoa! I may party, Prof, but I don't party, if you get my drift."
The Professor: "What? Hunh...oh! No, no! I just meant Hashish!"
Jason: "Fuck yeah! Let's do this shit! Reed College for the win!"
The Professor: "Smoke up, Jason, smoke up. A+, my boy! Now, when you get nice and relaxed and the hash has you groovin' just right, maybe we can really discuss your mistaken version of The Brown Man, hunh my succulent student?"
Jason: "Whatever you say, Prof. Whateeeeeeeevvvvvvveeeeeerr ya glarbglarggllleee saaaaa...."
I wonder if Reed will give me a job writing brochures for their college?
After talking with his obviously crazy Professor and seeing one woodcut of a half-man, half-plant creature, Jason Woodrue decided all this bullshit about Plant Avatars must be true because there was so little evidence of it.
And persistence and ignorance of probability eventually pays off!
Back to "reality," Buddy Baker believes Alec Holland has gone nuts when Swamp Thing (Woodrue Version, of course. I just have to explain that because I don't know how stupid you are or if you've actually been paying attention or perhaps, like usual, I just haven't been clear enough) challenges him to a duel. Buddy agrees to the challenge though because he realizes Woodrue wants to destroy the Avatar and Buddy doesn't want this nutcase hurting his daughter.
So they battle while Alec loses himself in more of Woodrue's past. Like when Woodrue went to see Foghorn Leghorn for some additional power.
"I say, I say son, yah got ta take the bull by the man-parts. By the testicles, that is."
Swamp Thing #26 Rating: No change. Swamp Thing was just a disembodied voice throughout this comic book! I can't justify a rise in the ranks when all Alec did was Narration Box the entire time! If I didn't like this title so much, that might even be a reason to drop the ranking! Anyway, I'm not sure how much The Swamp Thing can interfere with an Avatar as a member of the Parliament of Trees. If he's even a member! I'm a little bit unclear on that point. But I'm sure he'll learn to manipulate The Seeder and get him to fuck up his job so that The Parliament eventually realizes they've made a huge mistake. I think he'll probably contact Abby and get The Rot to help put down Woodrue.