Harley Quinn #0

Rated Teen? I guess Harley's Clown Car won't be seeing any action in this series.

Charlie Adlard contributed some art to this comic? Does that mean I won't be able to tell any of the characters apart during his pages? Sometimes while reading The Walking Dead, I can't tell if a page is full of the main characters or it's a shot of zombies. I haven't disliked an artist on a comic book that I continued to purchase because of the writer so much since Preacher and Steve Dillon's interchangeable faces with different hairpieces.

And the really good ones don't draw any two characters alike, Charlie Adlard!

The premise seems to be Harley Quinn is wasted on alcohol and sugar and, probably, anti-psychotics. This causes her to strike up a conversation with Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti who might possibly write a comic book about her. I probably don't know enough about all the individual artists to understand most of the jokes that will be in this comic book. It already took me long enough to figure out why Jimmy Palmiotti does the cowboy stuff! But that's because I'm only an Apprentice Comic Book Reader!

I only recently became aware that Connor and Palmiotti were a couple (probably when I heard about them doing this book?) because I don't really clamber around behind the scenes of comic books. Not that I'm not interested to maybe know more about the creators. But you can never seem to read articles about comic books without getting a shit-fucking-ton of spoilers about upcoming stories and what's next on DC or Marvel's big crossover to-do list. Most of the conversation about comic books takes place somewhere about four to six months ahead of the stories currently sitting on the shelves of the comic book store. Just by writing about Harley Quinn #0, I'm already at least six months behind the conversation. Everybody already talked this issue out! Why am I bothering?!

Another reason I like to remain fairly ignorant of the background noise of the industry is to keep my thoughts about the comic book storylines as untainted as possible. I want my reactions to be my reactions based on what has been written previously and what is currently being revealed as I turn each page. I don't need to know what Scott Lobdell's intentions were for the Teen Titans because I'm not reading it to see how well he executes his vision; I merely want to judge the story by the execution alone.

I am surprised that Tony Daniel's piece wasn't a one panel, two page splash!

The Joker is fairly reminiscent of Roger Sterling. They have the same skin tone, anyway. And I could see Roger coming in to work in that suit.

Harley winds up in a fairly standard 90s comic bit by Walter Simonson and then she gets a Jim Lee reprint page dressed in her new costume with one roller skate. The New 52 universe does not explode by having Reboot Harley interact with Preboot Batman. It's just a drunken hallucination anyway although if it's all in Harley's mind, The Joker must have told her that Bruce Wayne is Batman! Although she does get to cameo in her old outfit when Bruce Timm takes over.

I want five hundred dollar bucks!

When does she meet Ambush Bug? I think he warrants an appearance in this comic book. Let him out of the stupid Channel 52 bullpen, even if it's for a drunken fantasy comic book!

Next there's a joke about Doctor Manhattan's penis and a panel I especially like.

Of course Harley wants Batman's love interest to come in last place!

Next she gets to spend some time in the Tiny Titans world which doesn't go so well for Robin's underwear. Next Harley is in the passenger seat of a convertible as Poison Ivy drives it away from lots and lots of cops. Palmiotti comments on Harley doing that thing where you hold your hand out of a car and let it wave with the wind. I also used to like cupping my hand and feeling the ball of air inside of it and running my fingers as if they were a little man running along the fence posts and jumping from tree to tree to sign to hydrant to whatever until he would slam into a sign or a trash can or something that came out of nowhere.

Next she drives through some nice looking Sin City stuff before she winds up in the page that caused a lot of consternation. I'm not impressed by the new guy's work. Maybe I would have enjoyed it more if Harley had been drawn naked in a tub.

The numbers on All-Star Western shouldn't be anywhere near where they are! That's one of my favoritest books!

In the end, Harley Quinn goes with Chad Hardin which I approve of because he did a great job on the later issues of Demon Knights. Although the ad placement for Harley Quinn #1 kind of spoiled the surprise. Or would have spoiled the surprise if it were a surprise that Chad Hardin had been picked as the artist for the series. Hell, I already had his as the only name in the tags anyway!

Also, Harley finds out that some old client from Arkham has left her a building in Brooklyn. I guess that means she'll be opening up a detective agency for the criminally insane.

Harley Quinn #0 Rating: You really can't judge the series that this will eventually become by this issue. But I'll stick it somewhere on the ranking charts in middle or something anyway. Right next to Justice League 3000! Whenever that comes out.