Batman: The Dark Knight #25

Time once again for some lonely jerk losing himself in a character and spending all of his time dealing with The Penguin! Also Clayface is in this story.

Clayface has broken out of Arkham Asylum again because nobody knows how to keep that guy incarcerated while still maintaining an illusion of humane treatment. And now The Goddamned Fucking Batman has to waste more time hunting him down.

Clayface's first visit is to The Penguin to tell him that he won't be working for him anymore. He's paid his debt and he's going out on his own now. I wonder what ever happened between him and Poison Ivy? They seemed like a happy couple for a little while there. While Clayface is off thinking up his own crime spree which will probably be pretty stupid (no offense intended, you big moronic pile of clay, but seriously, you don't really have much of a brain anymore. Just a big pile of slimy sludge), Batman and Commissioner Gordon are investigating Clayface's breakout at Arkham.

I think Hurwitz has pages and pages of Batman suddenly appearing and disappearing around Gordon jokes. And as long as they keep making me laugh, I'll be happy to keep seeing them in these pages.

Batman surprises even himself when he sees the footage of Clayface kidnapping people and realizes that he was correct about Clayface going out and getting a new audience. He says, "I didn't mean it literally, Alfred." This is the only acceptable use of the word "literally." When a metaphor suddenly turns real. Also you can use it this way: "I literally figuratively shit my pants when that guy attacked me with a chainsaw." Also if that happened, you probably wouldn't need the figuratively in there, would you? Maybe I should have thought up a better example.

Batman and Alfred make a list of all locations in Gotham that have any ties to Basil Karlo or his movies. The list is too big for Batman to cover himself, so he decides to get some help tracking down the kidnapped citizens. The two people he calls on for help? Black Canary and...ugh...Condor. Really, Batman? I think you're above needing that asshole's help. Unless you can accidentally get him killed! Is that the plan?!

Yes!

Luckily Batman finds Clayface first so we won't have to see any more of Condor. Except Batman probably gave Black Canary and Condor a list of his locations and they'll come swinging in at the last second to help Batman defeat Clayface. Not that Batman needs anybody else's help. But they have to make it look good so maybe a few fans will think, "Neat! Maybe I should be reading Birds of Prey too!" No, you don't need to be reading it. Not at all.

Nice sarcasm, Batman. Do you think they'll ever help you again with that attitude?

As you can see from the above page, Batman defeats Clayface by knocking him into a gigantic fondue pot. I have no idea what a gigantic pot of melted cheese was doing in the theater. Perhaps it was the hors d'oeuvres for the cast party after the show?

See? Pages and pages of these jokes!

Clayface is returned to Arkham but this time he's kept in a pressure cooker to keep him from being able to keep any form. I guess that's as humane as they can make it with this guy.

Batman: The Dark Knight Rating: +8 Ranking. This issue wasn't a "+8 Ranking" kind of issue. But I figure this comic has been way farther down in the rankings than it deserves to be since Gregg Hurwitz took over. Ever since he came on board as the writer, this comic book has been interesting and entertaining. It was a pile of shit before that though, hence it's previous position at 37 on the charts.