Friday, June 29, 2012

Green Arrow #10

So he's been cornered by the editors at DC Comics?

Hopefully this issue of Green Arrow will have a blurb describing what's been happening. The only thing I remember is Green Arrow had sex with three women at once (triplets!) and Green Arrow never did recover that Polar Bear he was looking for. Oh! Speaking of Polar Bears! Join me in the next paragraph for a little bit of Lost (the television show) talk!

Everybody here? Great. Okay. I've mention before in these commentaries and to every bum on every street in Portland that would stay still long enough to hear me rant about it that the island in Lost was meant to be Purgatory. The writers and creators have all denied it but the whole fucking show makes complete sense if only they hadn't abandoned that story because too many people on the internet guessed it. Don't worry, I"m getting to the Polar Bear.

So, the Island was Purgatory. Don't spit on me for my horrible research but the following quote is from Wikipedia: "In addition to accepting the states of heaven and hell, Catholicism envisages a third state before being admitted to heaven. According to Catholic doctrine, some souls are not sufficiently free from the temporal effects of sin and its consequences to enter the state of heaven immediately, nor are they so sinful as to be destined for hell either." The Others were these souls. The passengers on the plane were also these souls. The ones that died outright were instantly sent to Heaven or Hell. The ones like Jack and Kate and Sawyer who were stuck on the island were yet to be free of the "temporal effects of sin." This is why the show was set up the way it was set up. We flashback to their lives when they were alive and the reasons that they ended up in Purgatory. Then on the Island, we see them enduring punishments or redeeming themselves and moving beyond the attitudes and personality traits, the flaws, that caused them to sin in the first place.

The Others are souls that don't want to play the fucking game. So they want to kidnap the best people on the island, the ones most easily redeemed or with the greatest amount of (for lack of a better term) "good". They have some means by which they can siphon off this good for themselves and thus enter Heaven quicker.

Now, Lost didn't get that far into the Purgatory plot. But most of what it did, it was heading toward that revelation. But most of all, they wanted Walt because Walt could do things with his mind. How this would help them, I don't know. But Walt had the ability to create things as seen in his old life in Australia when he's looking at the bird book and then that same bird crashes into the window. And then on the island, he's reading one of Hugo's Spanish Green Lantern comic books featuring a Polar Bear. And, lo and behold, a Polar Bear is on the island! It's created by Walt.

Of course, after Walt grew too much to keep him in the series and the plot changed course, the Polar Bear came from a zoo on the island. Don't get me wrong! I like a lot of what the series did after they changed course! But stop fucking denying that the island was Purgatory, fellas.

And in summation, I have no idea why Green Arrow wanted that Polar Bear!

This issue begins with a woman in love with cars trying to kill herself by riding a motorcycle off of a bridge. I've probably driven over that bridge but I'm really bad with my Seattle Locations Knowledge. Oh, and it also begins with a summary of what's been going on!

If you can't read that, it's okay. It's complete bullshit.

The woman Green Arrow just rescued is pissed off that he saved her from dying. She declares she's a robot and there isn't any law against a robot killing itself. Even if their is a law against a robot (or a human!) killing itself, it's a stupid fucking law!

Suicidal Suicider: "I felt like ending it all but I was afraid if I got caught, I might have to pay a fine or do some jail time."

Have you ever met one of T.O. Morrow's androids? Or Doctor Magnus's Metal Men? Free will all over the Goddamned place. And even if she is a robot without free will, maybe she was programmed to kill herself! I now know Green Arrow isn't a robot because he's dumber than an Atari 2600.

I really don't think she is a robot so Green Arrow is correct about her being human. But he just had a lucky guess. She, on the other hand, is a logic spewing firecracker! Which might mean she's a robot! Or a Vulcan!

I want to die every time I read Ollie's comic book adventures!

Psycho Pauline bashes her face against a wall and knocks herself unconscious so Ollie takes her to the hospital. At the hospital, they find wire filaments embedded under her skin and a bar code tattoo on the bottom of her foot. The bar code has the name of a company: Nacrotics. That's the stupidest name of a company I've every heard! It sounds like they sell drugs made from corpses. While they examine her, she comes to and begins TMIing all over the place.


The next day, Oliver Queen heads off to find this Nacrotics place to take a look at the robots and maybe purchase one. Or all of them. The salesman tells Ollie that each Robot is based on a real person. I'm thinking the guy digs up bodies and moves the personalities into the robots. So it's a kind of Robot Purgatory! And the guy named his business Nacrotics because Necrotic (Necro + Robitcs) is already a word and a dead give away to what he's doing. So Nacrotics with an "a" and then people read it and think "Narcotics" first!

Oliver Green visits Suicidal Pauline's parents to discover she was adopted. But she was young and has grown, so how could she possibly be a robot? This looks like a job for Green Arrow! He heads back to confront the Nacrotics guy.

Green Arrow the Detective: "I'll interview the parents first and then I'll...fuck this! Detective work is hard! I'll just go back to the Robot Store and demand the truth!"

But he doesn't get the truth. He just gets into a big fight with a bunch of robots. Or a bunch of people who think they're robots. Or a bunch of robots who think they're people. But when Pauline shows up and threatens him with his life, he spills the cogs.

Sir, you cannot disconnect from life and still enjoy it. If you want to disconnect, you aren't enjoying it anyway. See the problem?

So this jerk developed a chip that limits a person's emotions. And, I guess, it takes their free will away and tells them what to do. He says he "removes the anxiety of free will." No, you remove anxiety. The two don't necessarily go hand in hand. And free will is just an illusion anyway. If two roads diverge into a yellow wood, you're going to take the path you fucking take. It's a choice in one moment and then inevitable a few moments later because you've chosen. Don't fucking stress over it, robot people.

Maybe this story is a criticism of the status quo? Or maybe it's a criticism of robotics? Or maybe it's just a not very elegantly done minor story modeled off of any one of Philip K. Dick's books.

Oh! The company name was "Nacrotics" because it's basically a Robot Narcotic dulling the senses of the individual undergoing the process!

Green Arrow #10 Rating: No change. This wasn't a bad story. But it was handled amateurishly. She seems to have more than enough writing credits to her name to be submitting something this sloppy. Perhaps the deadline for the story rushed Ann Nocenti through the process and she didn't give this story the proper attention it needed. It definitely could have used two issues at least and been a little more subtle and a little more focused as to its point. Having the guy confess everything when he's threatened to be killed effectively just drops the whole synopsis and idea of the story on a single page. That needs to be stretched out and told through dialogue and action, not instant summary. But Green Arrow isn't dropping in the ranks this month because the gem of the idea could have worked.

No comments:

Post a Comment