Aquaman #9

Last commentary, I guessed this fight would take place in-between issues. It would be cool if this cover were the only representation of the fight and it was already over in the pages of this issue.

Black Manta is currently infiltrating a psychiatrischer krankenhaus so that he can murder Prisoner of War. If you had a Seal of Clarity like Black Manta, you could smash it against your computer monitor and the words "psychiatrischer krankenhaus" would change to "psychiatric hospital." So I guess that's what the Seal of Clarity does! It transmutes German words into English words. Or it probably just changes the world so that everything is understandable by the person smashing the Seal of Clarity on various surfaces in the world.

Prisoner of War is busy crank calling the relatives of his buddies who died in Desert Storm. Or the next Iraq War. Or the War in Afghanistan. Probably Iraq since photos of his buddies show them in desert camouflage. Black Manta seems to have something against crank calls.

When did Black Manta become a silent assassin?

Oh, scratch that caption! Black Manta sucks at silent assassinating! Manta just can't help commenting on P.O.W.'s extreme crazy instead of going for the quick kill and ends up thrown across the room. P.O.W. only has time to put on one magic shackle before Black Manta shoots him in the chest with a harpoon. Now that's more like the Black Manta I know! But P.O.W. manages to shoot Black Manta in the chest with a normal person's weapon. He then leaps out the window to escape Manta and to keep the Magic Shackles safe.

Oh, and when I wondered last commentary if each of his Dog Tags grant him a special power? Well, they do! Because P.O.W. has the skills of each man who wore the tag before him. He is a medic and a paratrooper and a sniper and a brawler and a fuel truck driver and a shit ditch digger and a tank mechanic and probably even a military cook!

Meanwhile in the Amazon Rainforest, a full page fight is going on that looks a lot like the cover. So much like the cover that I won't bother scanning it. But it does look like the fight is well under way and Aquaman and Ya'wara and the jaguar are winning.

Well, maybe not the jaguar.

Ya'wara has the ability to telepathically command animals the way Aquaman can telepathically command fish! Her power is much more useful, of course. But then she can be shot in the face and die while bullets just bounce off of Aquaman's pressure toughened skin. With the help of some local pumas, Ya'wara and Aquaman put down the last of the attackers. Afterward, Ya'wara feels like a quickie connection with Aquastud.

I wonder what Vostok was doing when the Moon was busy attacking the Earth in Stormwatch.

Back at Dr. Shin's place, Mera begins the grueling process of beating the crap out of him so he'll tell her about his connection with Black Manta.

This is all prologue to Shin's Manta story.

Since nobody would believe Shin about his boy from Atlantis, he searched for somebody who could help him restore his credibility as a scientist. He sent Black Manta to get a sample of Arthur's blood. But when Manta attacked, Arthur's father, Thomas, intervened.

Holy Mackerel!

So Black Manta has a right to seek vengeance against Aquaman! And Aquaman is revealed to be a gigantic douchebag! How is Aquaman going to come out of this smelling like sea roses? I don't know! Probably because Black Manta is such a huge dick, Arthur can't help but look good in comparison. And Black Manta did sort of cause the death of Thomas Curry. But it doesn't really matter who is right and wrong here. This is how comic book rivalries should be! Neither one being totally at fault and neither one being totally free of blame. They both have extremely good reasons to hate one another.

Speaking of hating one another, Aquaman finally confronts Black Manta when Ya'wara teleports herself and Aquaman to Germany to try and save Prisoner of War. And that's where this issue ends. I hope next issue doesn't begin with this confrontation already half over!

Aquaman #9 Rating: +1 Ranking. This comic continues to surprise while the last issue of Action Comics, while good, wasn't really Super special. And the back-up story in Action Comics #9 was better than the main story! So Aquaman can have at least one week at Spot #2. Hell, if Batman #10 sucks ass, maybe Aquaman can be the best comic currently in the New 52! That's crazy talk!