The Fury of Firestorm #10

I'm so bored of Nuclear Men.

So far, Pozhar has been the most powerful Firestorm. He's untouchable. Even with the incredible powers each Firestorm wields, Pozhar has been able to easily destroy every rogue Firestorm he's come across. But their power levels are so incredibly huge, the fights don't really have any logic behind them. There's no reason Pozhar isn't annihilated but his combatant is. The Firestorms might just as well be a bunch of rampaging alcoholic pugilists who beat the shit out of each other with their bare hands whenever they encounter one another.

Hopefully something interesting happens this issue.

The story has split into two main lines: Pozhar hunting rogue Firestorms with Ronniestorm as his new sidekick and Jasonstorm continually having delusional arguments with Ronnie while he flounders about with no direction. From the way this issue begins, it doesn't look like anything new and exciting is changing with Ronniestorm's story arc.

This is just another war comic with a couple of soldiers hunting terrorists. Having mentioned the intense boredom yet?

Jason's story arc might be changing up quite a bit as he seems to be close to getting some direction finally!

He's currently in the Quantum Field with Firehawk.

They entered the field by kissing which caused them to merge (isn't that the entire point?) and turn into a creature called Wrath. But Jason seems to think Wrath wasn't very stable because the Quantum Field already had Fury. I don't think that makes any sense but then Jason is just a high school student who thinks he's smarter than everybody else.

Firehawk just thinks he's a big jerk.

After that side trip into the Quantum Field, Jasonstorm is back where he started: directionless and confused. But maybe he can get some pointers from Firehawk since she seems to be France's state sponsored Nuclear Terror.

Back to the Nuclear A Team, Pozhar discusses his scientific theories on the powers of Firestorms. Most of his theory is backed by random speculation and hard-hitting suppositions with some wild imagination thrown in for good measure.

Now, now. Did you hypothesize it or did Martin Stein hypothesize it? Did the smart professor think up the theory with proofs and logics and sciences or did the crazy military Firestorm assassin come up with it? Quick, Pozhar, what's two times two?!

The above caption was for the first panel in that triptych. Here's the caption for the middle panel:

Really? Another plan that relied on a whole bunch of completely random shit out of Stein's control or future forethought but it was a plan anyway. At least Pozhar has no idea what he's talking about here. He's just overconfident when it comes to Stein's abilities.

The third panel doesn't get a caption but it sets up what happens next. Pozhar pulls out the standard "piss off the young recruit that doesn't believe in himself" ploy so that Ronniestorm gets super pissed off and accidentally regrows his missing arm using his nuclear powers. The arm doesn't stay but Pozhar seems to think the nuclear fake arm is what Ronnie should be emulating and he should stop wasting his time worrying about the flesh and blood part.

The near choke hold almost always works.

Meanwhile, Jasonstorm and Firehawk have been ejected by the Quantum Field to find themselves in Russia. Jason wants Ronnie answers and he believes he can only find them by finding Ronnie and merging with him. How come the fans freaked out when they learned Alan Scott was gay but nobody gives a shit about Jasonstorm lusting after the high school quarterback? This comic book isn't a war book at all! It's a romance!

The Quantum Field rejected the heterosexual couple. It only wants the two men to merge in passionate fury! And notice how Jason can't help but think in blow job metaphors when discussing Ronnie and the, ahem, "Quantum Field"?

Back with the Action Team, Pozhar is attacked by Raksashi, the Sanctioned Indian Firestorm. She's attacking Pozhar because she senses a Rogue Firestorm signature in him. She claims he gave birth to the Rogue Protocols. But Pozhar easily takes her power away from her as their fight stalls and becomes a heated argument. But then Ronniestorm comes flying in wanting answers. He wants to know about Ashra Khan from Raksashi because that's the name the rogue Firestorms keep yelling and Raksashi mentioned the name while attacking Pozhar. And from Pozhar, he wants to know the best thing to buy another man for a first date that will guarantee the sex.

Ooh! Intriguing!

The Fury of Firestorm The Nuclear Men #10 Rating: +1 Ranking. I'm giving this issue a boost to the rankings because I think it works as a biracial homosexual romantic tale! I'd been hinting that it feels that way but I think I should stop hinting and just fucking believe what I want to believe! I might have to reread the whole series now!