Saturday, November 28, 2015

Harley Quinn #22


I feel a bit uncomfortable now. Is this comic book making light of domestic terrorism?!

I don't really care if this comic book were making light of domestic terrorism! Because making light of domestic terrorism isn't domestic terrorism. Making jokes about a clown who goes around murdering people doesn't end up with dead people everywhere. You know what else it doesn't do? It doesn't create a culture in which domestic terrorism is more likely to happen. This is true of a lot of things that people joke about that doesn't end in anybody actually being hurt. It's weird that way, you know? It's almost as if some people who feel powerless want to gain some kind of power and so they tell other people what they can and can't do because, as they explain it, what those people are doing is literally the same thing as the thing being done. People like to throw "literally" in there a lot. Mostly because they're idiots and they don't see that writing a comic book about a domestic terrorist clown doesn't literally cause terrorism. Those people also probably believe they know what propaganda is and that they would never fall for it ever.

I was using domestic terrorism as a metaphor in the previous paragraph because it's less controversial than the thing I was actually talking about.

This issue begins with Harley Quinn going on a shopping spree using Deadshot's credit card. Hey! I have a secret to tell you! I don't really like this comic book very much. Sure, it's fine. It's whimsical and cartoonish and stars one of comic book fandom's favorite characters. And I enjoy the art. But it's kind of...boring. I think I've hit my Harley Quinn threshold!


Zena Bendemova was resurrected and had her youth restored just like Deathstroke! I wonder if the first thing she'll do is look at her vadge?

The resurrection happened a week ago so that Zena can be prepared to attack Harley as soon as she gets back from Los Angeles. I'm not sure why she went to Los Angeles. I guess she still had some leftover jokes about Los Angeles that she forgot to use in her Road Trip Special.

The attack really does happen the instant she gets back! She's picked up at the airport by Zena's goons instead of by her pal Goatboy who's tied up in a closet with being tied up.

The limousine takes her to an ambush where Harley manages to kill all of Zena's thugs. It happens across four pages and not just one sentence but I don't think blow-by-blow accounts of comic book battles should make up the bulk of my commentaries. Although in one panel, you get a glimpse of a Russian woman's underwear which is super hot except that she's dead on the next page which kind of ruins the moment for me. I wish I'd masturbated before turning the page! Now if I want to wank to it (it was a really nice pair of underwear!), I'm going to feel weird and be thinking about her corpse. That might lead me down a strange path that I think I'm too old to begin walking down. Necrophilia is a young man's game! It just seems like a lot of work unless you accidentally stumble into it.

Meanwhile in prison, Mason is having a rough go since somebody put a hit out on him. Since Harley plans on putting Mason's penis in her mouth and her vagina and probably her butthole too, she's going to have to save him later. But first she has to deal with Zena Bendemova.


Now that she's back home, we can get some hilariously fresh Harley's beaver and my cock jokes!

After the Mike Cock zinger, there's a panel of a bunch of birds shitting on a guy who told a woman to get back into the kitchen. The "fap" sound effect is used liberally. Does that mean jerking off sounds like a swarm of birds shitting? I think I can see that.

Harley Quinn calls a meeting of the Harleys because she has two missions for them: save Mason and find Sy Borgman. That means the team will have to split up and also make some titty jokes and call penises "yogurt slingers" and talk about twiddling chocolate donuts which--I'm assuming!--means something hilariously gross.

Harley Quinn #22 Rating: No change. This comic book really doesn't hold my interest. It's the main reason why most of my commentaries on the Harley Quinn books are so short. I'm usually thinking about playing more Call of Duty or eating a huge slice of carrot cake or finally getting around to rewatching Wizards and Warriors for the first time since it aired on television in 1983. What I am not thinking about is how intriguing the plot of the comic book is or what themes might emerge if I looked closer at all the cock, beaver, and poop jokes. Normally I'd really be up for delving into cocks, beavers, and poop! But this comic book is skirting Giffen/DeMatteis territory. That means it's recycling the same jokes over and over again while keeping the main story as stale and predictable as possible. But I do love Chad Hardin's art!

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