We Are Robin #11

I glanced at this cover quickly before sticking it in the scanner and didn't see the John Romita Jr. Variant Cover badge on it. But I was going to say the poses are horrible enough to be a John Romita Jr. cover. And then I saw that it was indeed a cover by John Romita Jr. That wasn't the best anecdote I've ever told.

The Review or Whatever!
I don't really care about this comic book so this will be a quick review that barely says anything at all about the book. As opposed to my lengthy reviews that barely say anything at all about the book. Although if it gives me stuff to talk about on every page, what am I going to do? Not fill up the Internet with my opinions?! That would be irresponsible! Like on this first page! The reader finds out that Dax is the son of Joe Chill! What the fuck?! Y'all couldn't let us know this eleven issues ago?! You know how many people never made it to this revelation because this book was so tepid?! Now who's being irresponsible, Mr. Bermejo?!

I wish comic books had more faith in keeping an audience by revelation rather than keeping an audience by teasing. Here's the thing! If you end a comic book with a character going "It's you!" while never revealing who the "you" is, I'm going to assume that the revelation isn't going to be as awesome as you want people to think it is. You're trying to lure them into buying the next issue to discover the person's identity. But how about this suggestion? Reveal the fucker and get the reader to go, "Holy shit! Not that person! Things are going to get crazy next issue! I have to buy it!" I guess a lot of comic books do that too! But why wait until the last page for the reveal? Thrill me four or five times every issue! Don't just tease the one big surprise at the end of the book! That's wasting nineteen pages on manufactured suspense! And yes, I realize that any work of fiction is manufactured. But since it's fiction and it's manufactured, how about assembling more surprises quicker?! Jerks!

I don't want anybody to think that complaint was directed at We Are Robin #11. This shit just revealed Dax's last name is Chill on the first page!

I've already written way more than I was going to write about this comic book. I guess it's pulled me in! It's also possible I'm not in a big hurry to read my next old New Titans comic book on the stack because it's an Annual. Here's a comic book rule of thumb: Annuals generally suck.

After the Joe Chill revelation, Bermejo spends a few pages calling gun owners cowards. Or was he calling promiscuous women sluts?

"I respect every woman who has ever let me have sex with them." That's something I hope to be able to say one day!

Smiley and the Jokers have taken over Riko's school and the rest of the Robins have been called in to help stop them. Meanwhile, Alfred watches everything on the Gotham News with a jar of lotion and a Batsock.

Oh! Here's the part where I run out of things to say and just summarize the rest of the book as quickly as possible! The Robins save the day and they fire Alfred! They're the future of Gotham and they'll be damned if some guy with experience is going to teach them anything! Fucking old people! How dare they try to help since all their help really amounts to is shaking their heads and saying things like, "Yeah. You're so passionate right now. You'll learn soon enough!"

P.S. I liked the art a lot.