Thursday, March 17, 2016

The New Titans #63 (February 1990)



Don’t worry, Titans Fans! The team wasn’t terminated forty-something issues before the series finally ended! That would be weird, right? I guess Nightwing could have rehired Danny Chase and they could have restarted the group with a bunch of heroes worse than Speedy. Only Raven and Joey were killed in this issue. I mean almost killed! Jericho may as well have been killed because he looks foolish without his sideburns.

The Werewealthy have easily become the Titans biggest threat they’ve faced. But that’s what happens when you deal with all of your parental issues by beating up your fathers and then drop the Teen from your name and enter the adult world. You find out that the real enemies are rich assholes! And they’re the toughest enemies you’ll ever face! Not tough in a wears a denim jacket and smokes and rides a motorcycle around the baseball field and throws and hits well enough to save the worst team in the little league tough. They’re actually quite soft and pasty. But metaphorically, they’re super tough because they have so many resources and they have control of the American government because everybody knows money talks and votes are ultimately meaningless. Sure, we’ll all go to the polls and feel good (okay, only about 45% of us will probably go to the polls. And then that 45% will feel smug and look down on the 55% who didn’t go to the polls because they assume the people who didn’t vote would have voted their way when in reality there is a reason they didn’t vote and it’s because everybody sucks and laws are idiotic and we should all just do whatever we want like having orgies in the street (only in crosswalks because safety matters!) and set fires to bars because wouldn’t those go up spectacularly and write manifestos that ultimately make no sense and matter less than the vote that could have been cast) but the guys with money will continue to do whatever they want. Like turn into monsters and kick the shit out of the other 99% who can’t turn into monsters! Jerks.

What I’m trying to say is I think this story is an analogy or a metaphor! Even Slade Wilson is on the right side and he’s a rich bastard too! Except he’s worse than the other rich bastards because they think money makes right while he thinks violence makes right. I suppose if I had to choose between the two worlds, I’d rather live in one where the people with money control my life than live in the world where the people who utilize violence control my life. Although I live in America so I guess I’m lucky enough to have both!

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