Saturday, April 23, 2016

Starfire #11

I find John Romita Jr's covers boring and I'm upset that my comic book store gave me so many of them.

The Review!
This comic book is like belly button lint. I can live with or without it. Sometimes it just sits there and I don't even care it's there and sometimes it provides me a moment's pleasure as I pick it out and give it a sniff. Some people might be more into belly button lint than I am, so they might appreciate this comic book more than me. It's not bad but it's the kind of comic book that winds up at the bottom of the stack each week because I'm not super interested in what happens.

The Commentary
In this issue, Starfire accidentally procreates with an overly sexually aggressive chipmunk-man whose species only lives for two days (which is why he's so insistent about getting his penis in something (I mean, getting the top of his head rubbed (if you get my meaning (actually, you don't have to 'get my meaning' because I meant it literally)))). That's the kind of wacky hi-jinks that take place in the monthly Starfire series. I should also mention, since it's cropped up in the zeitgeist again and since I'm one of the few reviewers I know of who constantly mentions it anyway, Sweaty Grabbyhandza...I mean, Eddie Berganza is the group editor of this comic book and he's almost certainly a serial sexual harasser. I wonder if somebody rubbed the top of his head, his back would explode with spawn and he'd keel over dead? Has anybody tried it?

Don't think of them as babies. Think of them as tomorrow's crop of sex offenders. And I mean "tomorrow" literally since these things will be dead by the day after tomorrow.

Starfire is worried that the life she's living and enjoying will one day be Rebooted and she'll lose it all. Ha ha! It will!

Starfire learns that she's a dangerous pest that is making life in Key West unsafe for everybody. At least that's what Stella tells her. Although Stella isn't wrong because the Teen Titans have a history of making things around them unsafe while never actually helping anybody ever. They're the worst.

Starfire decides to leave Key West for the safety of everybody living there. But then she decides to stay because Key West is having a ten day long party called Fantasy Fest. So her belief that leaving is the safest thing for everybody is only as strong as her desire to have a good time. It's good to know she still has the heart of a Titan.

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