"Justice League Spooky" is a much better name than "Justice League Dark."

Nebiros! (as seen in DC Universe Presents #14-16)

Part 19 of an at least 52 part series of Who’s Who entries of New 52 characters (but probably a whole lot more what with cancellations and all).

PERSONAL DATA
Alter Ego: None
Occupation: Demon Lord of a nameless hell
Marital Status: Unknown
Known Relatives: None
Group Affiliation: None
Base of Operations: A nameless hell
First Appearance: BLUE DEVIL #1
Height: 12' Length: 25'
Weight: Incalculable [Because nobody can get him on a scale?]
Eyes: Green Hair: None

HISTORY
"Thousands of years ago, a long-since forgotten civilization worshiped their demon-god, Nebiros [So he's not just a demon! He's a god! I think it's an insult to say he rules "a nameless hell". Or is that his own description of his world?]. Their priests breached the void between his dimension and our own, unleashing the monster on the world. They sacrificed captives to him, and in return he led their armies in an attempt to conquer the world.

Eventually Nebiros' empire grew to threaten the other great powers of the day: Mu, Lemuria, and Atlantis. The greatest mages of these realms banded together to defeat Nebiros. They vanquished his armies and banished him to his own dark dimension [Oh, so now it's simply a "dark dimension"?]; forever, they hoped.

But six thousand years later, Nebiros was accidentally freed by Sharon Scott and Wayne Tarrant, friends of Dan Cassidy, during the filming of Blue Devil (see Blue Devil). Cassidy defeated the monster, returning him to his realm, but at terrible cost to himself [If you call having a gigantic blue demon stunt suit with super powers fused to your body a cost!].

Shortly thereafter, Nebiros became freed again, this time threatening Mexico. Once more he was defeated by the Blue Devil, who was aided by Zatanna (see Zatanna).

Now Nebiros broods in his dark realm [Or nameless hell. Or dark dimension.], dreaming of returning to Earth to conquer the world and avenge himself upon the Blue Devil."

POWERS & WEAPONS
"Nebiros is an awesomely mighty engine of raw mystic power. His magic is not refined into spells and incantations, but rather is unleashed as pure supernatural chaos.

He is virtually indestructible, possessed of nearly limitless strength and stamina, fast beyond belief, and inhumanly savage.

For a brief period he possessed the Blue Devil's trident, which he altered into a potent conduit to channel and control mystic energy from his dimension, but the Blue Devil eventually regained control of the trident, and Nebiros generally eschews weaponry [He sounds so sophisticated!].

Perhaps Nebiros' only real weakness is his odd, demonic sense of honor [Oh no! Not this bullshit again! Honor is always a person's downfall!]. By his own standards, he is an ethical being, adhering to a code of conduct that, while terrifyingly alien, is also rigorous. He is direct and straightforward, and this makes him peculiarly susceptible to the subterfuges of less honorable entities [and to Daniel Cassidy's bad jokes.]"

DC Universe Presents #16: Black Lightning & Blue Devil

The Creature Commandos have their title cancelled and already these movie monster scabs are trying to take their place.

Last issue Blue Devil had his suit of demon skin stolen by Nebiros. But since the skin was originally Nebiros's skin, I guess that's technically not stealing. But Black Lightning wasn't definitely more than technically shot by Tobias Whale. Delightning (that's the team of Blue Devil and Black Lightning! I'm sure DC wants this duo to be called Black & Blue but I prefer Delightning) tracked down Tobias Whale and Nebiros because they wanted to stop their drug running operation. They also wanted to save Black Lightning's dad. But they might have failed because Black Lightning is now mortally wounded and Blue Devil is naked.

I should probably say Daniel Cassidy is naked because the Blue Devil suit (skin) was torn apart when Nebiros tried to stuff his fat ass into it. Apparently he's gained a few inches since he had his skin torn off by Etrigan. Feeling fat and not so pretty, Nebiros can't handle killing Daniel Cassidy on his own right now. So he brings some of the wax figures to life so they can tear Daniel apart.

Fucking scabs. This is why Frank, Griffith, and Velcoro lost their jobs! Bastards.

I haven't forgotten about Black Lightning but since he's bleeding out on the floor, his story just isn't as exciting as Cassidy being attacked by old time movie monsters. But I should probably see what else is going on since Tobias Whale hasn't forgotten about him either. Whale goes to put an end to Black Lightning when Black Lightning decides to give up on his non-killing philosophical viewpoint. He's dying so why shouldn't the guy who killed him die as well?

See? See you in hell is the type of thing you say to someone you're intending to kill.

Cassidy realizes Black Lightning is dying and how the fuck can he go on with the sassy name of Delightning if his partner dies. I guess Lightning is still trapped somewhere in The Red. If he finds her, he could keep up the nickname. But it would probably be easier to save Jefferson Pierce. With that in mind (yes, he contemplated all of that. It's so obvious), he slides back into the torn apart Blue Devil skin and it reattaches. Now he has enough magic to destroy the monster scabs and illegally hunt Whale and send Nebiros back to hell and heal Black Lightning and untie Black Lightning's dad and massage his wrists and get him a glass of water.

Says the gigantic green demon from hell.

Except he apparently doesn't have the time or the power to save Black Lightning from death. But Nebiros does. So Blue Devil makes a deal with Nebiros: Nebiros will heal Black Lightning if Blue Devil lets Nebiros live. Blue Devil accepts. Now Blue Devil has even more reason to have his own comic book. He's got a warehouse full of dangerous yet humiliated magical artifacts that can cause a lot of trouble and he's got an arch-enemy that wants him killed. And, of course, if he allows Black Lightning to tag along, the comic can be called Delightning. We all win! And by we I mean me.

Black Lightning is revived but he's a complete douchebag now. Nebiros added a twist of evil to him when he brought him back. But isn't that always the way? There's a cost to this stuff and nothing ever comes back the same. You reap what you sow and then the cat fucking stinks to high heaven. All of that stuff. But Blue Devil isn't going to let Nebiros get away with it! He decides to back out on his deal as well. Although technically Nebiros didn't back out. And I guess technically Blue Devil isn't either! He's letting Nebiros go but in the body of Tobias Whale.

I'm not sure what he did with Tobias Whale's soul. It might have been stored in his trident.

Everything works out for the people things are supposed to work out for (not counting Dan Cassidy's grandfather who is still dead). And the issue ends with "The Beginning!" Oh, how terribly trite.

DC Universe Presents #16: Black Lightning and Blue Devil Rating: No change. I would have enjoyed more funny dialogue in this series but, hey, you can't be funny all the time! Look at my blog. 1000 posts and maybe 5% make me really laugh. And entertaining myself is the most important thing in the world. And I don't just mean my world. All you slackers out there on Earth need to get busy entertaining me. Stop being so boring! The people I follow on Tumblr and those that follow me and/or comment on my commentaries are excluded from the "boring" label because you are entertaining me. And I thank you!

Besides the not being as funny as I would have liked, this comic did a lot of things right. Minus the Kid Flash episode, the stories in DC Universe Presents have been very good at telling a concise story introducing characters to the New 52 and setting up a broader storyline that can continue to be told in the future. "The Beginning" ending might very well be trite but it is reasonably true as well. There was a lot of material presented in this three issue arc that could easily be mined to support an ongoing monthly series. Good job!

DC Universe Presents #15: Black Lightning & Blue Devil

Guest starring an army of Skrulls!

I'm enjoying DC Universe Presents but it really should cut down the length of the stories to one or two issues. They should raise the price of the comic by fifty cents and flesh it out with four more pages. For me, the draw of this type of comic book is seeing who gets spotlighted every month. After two issues, I feel like I saw enough of the worlds of Black Lightning and Blue Devil and I'm ready to move on. Although Blue Devil could already have a successful monthly comic book after the B-Movie Studio humiliating magical artifacts plot idea. That was simply marvelous.

This issue begins with, I believe, Black Lightning trying on Blue Devil's demon skin.

It's probably a little tight in some places. Oh, you know what places I'm talking about!

Elsewhere in town, Tobias Whale has a new drug on the street that turns the user into an unholy monster from the pits of Hell. Overdosing on the stuff is okay unless your friends panic and rush you into a church until help arrives.

I've never once had a medical emergency where I said, "Quick! Get this man to a church!" Although I did once help a kid that landed a bicycle jump on his face into a school. Nobody exploded.

Back to the main attraction, Daniel Cassidy and Jeff Pierce have taken to getting coffee together. Cassidy wants to team up as Delightning to take down Tobias Whale and get his demon drugs off of the street. But Pierce has yet to lose a family member to the bad guy, so he's not sure he wants to hang out with a guy that wears the skin of a demon. It just seems like a bad idea. But since Jefferson Pierce's dad is an investigative journalist and he's planning on meeting Tobias Whale (or Nebiros (or one of their underlings)) later that night for a scoop, I have a feeling Pierce might soon have the motivation to tackle the Whale. Should I have said harpoon there?

Pierce's dad won't let him tag along for backup, so Pierce decides to go after the big fat white Whale with Blue Devil.

Blue Devil has no qualms about eviscerating the so-called bad guys. Perhaps when they look like zombies, there's an unspoken super hero agreement that it's okay to kill them.

Black Lightning refuses to zap these guys with too much power because he doesn't want to kill anyone. But Blue Devil, having a sense of magic and mumbo jumbo, tells Black Lightning that they're already dead, so it's okay this time.

While Delightning is mopping up the back alleys with zombie brains and zombie gizzards, Black Lightning's father is walking into a trap. Just like a clueless father slash journalist to screw up everything. Dammit. I probably shouldn't have typed that last sentence. Now people looking for fiction about fathers ass-fucking journalists are going to find this site and be thoroughly confused. Sorry, gay father/journalist porn lovers! As they say in the colloquial, "My error!"

Clever, fat man. Clever. Now I'm picturing another level of reality where someone is reading the comic book of me reading this comic book and typing, "Clever, fat man. Clever." And that person is saying, "Nice one, asshole." It's a pan-dimensional waterfall of witty retorts!

Blue Devil and Black Lightning find the Whale and Nebiros because Blue Devil can sense Nebiros. And that wasn't Black Lightning trying on Blue Devil's skin on the opening page. That was Nebiros getting his skin back after Etrigan tore it from his body "long, long ago." And he was screaming because Cassidy's penis must be severely misshapen.

Maybe Cassidy just infected the skin with the Herpes Virus.

The confrontation between naked Cassidy and Nebiros covered in his shredded old skin will have to conclude next issue. As will the fight between Black Lightning and Tobias Whale. Black Lightning zaps Whale so he can save his father but it seems Black Lightning doesn't hit the Whale with enough juice to put him down because he's got so much insulating material.

And that's what Black Lightning gets for refusing to kill people!

Be with us next time for "The Blue Devil in the Nude Mess," or "The Naked and the Dead."

DC Universe Presents #15: Black Lightning & Blue Devil Rating: No change. I'm less excited about the ending of this story than I am about who will be portrayed in issue #17! And all you solicits readers can just bite your motherfucking tongues, ya hear?! I don't want the surprise spoiled! I like finding out when I have the issue in my hands. I'm old fashioned!

DC Universe Presents #14: Black Lightning & Blue Devil

I didn't remember Nebiros so I read his Wikipedia page. That might be the most poorly written Wikiepedia page I've ever read! It ends with "He has a sense of honor, which is his only known weakness." I read it as he has a sense of humor which is his only known weakness. I think that would be more interesting.

Last issue, Blue Devil and Black Lightning inexplicably ended up in the same title together in some kind of Brave and the Bold team-up. Obviously this idea was hatched by some super imaginative editor that couldn't resist creating a team they could dub "Black & Blue." I like both of these characters and I was in a good mood, so I think I liked it. But brain chemistry being what it is, I could have been deluded. I'm looking at the cover of this one and wondering why I was so intrigued by it last time!

At the end of the last issue, both heroes were watching someone close to them die or about to die because the Great White Whale, Drowned J. Jonah Jameson, put a hit on the heroes. Or maybe that's only why Blue Devil's grandfather died in the crossfire. I think Black Lightning's dad was just getting attacked because he's butting his nose into something that isn't any of his nose's business.

Blue Devil immediately gets about his nose's business of vengeance.

Looks like that trident is a little more than a simple movie prop.

Before Blue Devil's grandfather died, he told Daniel (Blue Devil!) that the suit was more than a movie special effect. But now that his grandfather is dead, Daniel will have to learn about the suit on his own. It looks like whatever it just did to this thug's soul is a clue!

Blue Devil chases after a different thug while spouting B Movie cliches. For once, a super hero spouting bad dialogue has a character driven reason! Blue Devil is just regurgitating movie lines from his roles while a stunt man in shitty movies. Unless the demon that seems to be possessing him just has a shitty imagination. Blue Devil learns from this thug that Tobias Whale is the man behind the attack.

Meanwhile, Black Lightning finally remembers that he has a secret identity to protect as he's saving his dad.

Too bad he already screamed out "DAD!" while dropping to the street. Good thing Blue Devil sucks out there souls a page later.

Blue Devil and Black Lightning randomly meet up once again just as Blue Devil learns that Tobias Whale put a hit out on both of them. Los Angeles really is a small town. Black Lightning's dad gives them all a ride home and that's the end of that exciting night.

At Dan Cassidy's grandfather's funeral three days later, Dan runs into Jefferson Pierce (Black Lightning!). They went to the same high school and played football together. And Dan Cassidy realized that Jefferson Pierce was Black Lightning when they met a few days ago. Because he's as good a detective as Tim Drake! No, it's because they spent so much time in a locker room together. You really get to know a guy when you casually talk about banging high school chicks while your dicks are hanging out. I should know! Although I never played high school football.

Why is this comic book suddenly reminding me of Firestorm?

Meanwhile, the only one of Tobias Whale's thugs to survive the encounter with Blue Devil returns, although not of his own accord. To try to save himself from the wrath of Whale because he failed his mission and ran, he gives Whale the Demon's Cup prop he stole from Grandpa Liam's movie studio. Turns out, like Blue Devil's suit, it's more than just a prop. When Whale shoves it down he thugs throat, the cup mixes with blood and activates.

"I am Nebiros! My only weakness is Knock Knock Jokes!"

Back at Graveyard Studios, Jefferson Pierce actually meets with Dan Cassidy to discuss naming their new team. Blue & Black? Devil & Lightning? DELIGHTNING! There is also some foreshadowing in a movie poster for the version of Nebiros that I've created!

See? The Killing Joke! They're going to kill him with laughter!

Cassidy's grandfather left him a note along with the entire movie studio. Cassidy reads the note to Pierce and it all makes awesome sense.

I love this explanation!

Now the responsibility falls on Blue Devil to keep the world safe from his movie studio full of mystic Macguffins! Once Cassidy and Pierce realize all the crap around them is magic, they turn their attention to Cassidy's Blue Devil suit. Cassidy always thought the suit was made with fiber optics but Pierce takes one look at it and realizes it's simply skin with veins and nerve endings running through it. Cassidy has been wearing the skin of a demon that fuses to his body! Gross!

Blue Devil suggests that he and Black Lightning team up. What a surprise! I'm guessing they'll come to some sort of agreement since the story isn't quite over. And they still have to stop Whale, so they might as well work together.

Back in his office, Whale is striking up a deal of his own. He'll bring Blue Devil to Nebiros (who seems to hate him for some reason) and Nebiros will provide Tobias with powerful power or something. You know. Standard deal with a devil.

DC Universe Presents #14 Rating: +1 Ranking. The story is well told and I like the movie studio that humiliates evil relics to keep the world safe twist. Now I'm beginning to suspect Death Bed was a true story!

DC Universe Presents #13: Black Lightning and Blue Devil

I bet their team-up name becomes Delightning!

Blue Devil may have been one of the very first comics I began reading with the first issue. I don't know how the comic holds up today but as a young kid, I enjoyed the humor. But even back then, I felt the reluctant hero thing got old fairly quickly. I don't a person suddenly given super powers (in his case, a stunt suit fused to him) not feeling he must become a super hero. But if you've got your own title, just get on with it already! I'm not reading Blue Devil #5 to see how his day goes shopping at the local convenience store. Although that would be (or was?!) probably entertaining. He was a giant blue demon!

One of my other favorite comics which began my career of reading comics (can that be labeled a career? Am I wrong about that?) was Batman and the Outsiders which eventually became Adventures of the Outsiders as it republished stories from The Outsiders, except on shittier paper and lousier color. If any of that history is wrong, you have the option of shoving your actually straight up your ass. I'm probably nearly as accurate as any random Wikipedia entry!

That being said, I have no idea what Black Lightning and Blue Devil have been up to in the years before the Reboot. Looks like Blue Devil is an actual demon now. I know I've seen him working with Shadowpact that I know nothing about but sounds like I comic I would have been all over. Reading it! Not humping it. And possibly Black Lightning had a daughter? He may have had a daughter back in The Outsiders but I'll be fucked if I can remember much of those stories. I remember a Nuclear Family!

Why are these guys teaming up? Probably for no better reason than to be called Black and Blue. I hope there is a better reason though. Also, I prefer Delightning.

The story takes place in Los Angeles. You can tell it's Los Angeles because some kind of nefarious deal is going down in an empty, graffiti-filled concrete canal with a bunch of hot rods surrounding some guys saying, "Ese" and "Jesu Cristo." Also, the Location Box says Downtown Los Angeles.

I'd like an upside down Black Widow tattooed on the top of my head too!

Blue Devil is here to stop a drug deal and shut down some guy named Tobias Whale. Black Lightning shows up with the same plan in mind but he doesn't realize Blue Devil is on his side, so he gets aggressive.

I'm such a fucking optimist. I really thought Blue Devil was going to nip this good guy battle in the bud here.

But of course they fight each other while the drug dealers all get away Scott Free. How badly do you want to see Mister Miracle in DC Universe Presents? Yeah, me neither. Big Barda, however, is a story I'd love to read. Without her pansy husband.

The two trade mediocre quips and then Black Lightning makes a smurf joke. I have to say he's reaching here. Blue Devil is a big blue creature! You can't make a smurf joke against a guy who's over seven feet tall! Now if he had made a penis joke that involved smurfs, I would have found it acceptable. Or if he was from Oa.

Thankfully, the LAPD show up. I wonder if anybody has ever said that before? They break up the fight by threatening to shoot the shit out of them. Now I know that's been said before! But both Black Lightning and Blue Devil run off in separate directions. I wonder how many issues before their team-up actually becomes a team-up?

The next day, Black Lightning is reading a newspaper article asking if Blue Devil and Black Lightning are "heroes or psychos." Why can't they be both? He's a teacher for a school system that obviously needs a cash infusion.

What kind of cheap, knock-off American Flag is this?

His father stops by and for a brief moment, I expect this Black Lightning to be one of those new generational ones following in his dad's footsteps. But his dad calls him Jefferson, so he's the original. At least he's the original I grew up with!

Fuck you! What am I supposed to do? "At least he's the original with which I grew up"? Fuck! (That joke was for all the language lovers. You're welcome!)

I'll leave the arguing about ending sentences with prepositions to people who constantly feel the need to correct others about things that don't matter at all and get back to the story.

Meanwhile, Tobias Whale is a disgusting freak! Now, now. Don't all the freaks out there get up in arms about that sentence! It's obvious by clarifying "freak" with the adjective "disgusting" that I generally find freaks other than that. Some freaks are so fucking sensitive!

He kind of looks like J. Jonah Jameson if Jonah had drowned in a pool and was fished out two weeks later.

Tobias Whale's plan is to find out who these heroes are and have his men kill them. That sounds like a pretty solid plan. The first part is to lure them out and tag them. It's successful and Blue Devil gets a tracer stuck to him. I mean, stuck to his suit.

Oh! I guess it is still a suit and Dan is just a stuntman that feels it's okay to use the studio's property on his own time.

Some thugs follow him to the movie studio, break in, and kill Blue Devil's grandfather. Blue Devil comes out and holds him as he dies (and it seems perhaps his grandfather did something to Dan and the costume just before he dies?) and calls him "Grandpa Liam." At the same time, Black Lightning's father is out on the streets trying to find some leads on a story against Tobias Whale when a bunch of thugs pull some guns on him. Black Lightning is watching over him and jumps off the building to save him, yelling, "DAD!" I hope neither of these guys give a shit about keeping their identities secret.

DC Universe Presents #13: Black Lightning & Blue Devil Rating: +1 Ranking. This issue is a gigantic improvement over the Kid Flash story and a marked improvement over Issue #0. It's about two characters I've been interested since the beginning of my journey into comics. The humor wasn't great, just some spastic one-liners that barely made sense in the context of the fight. But I'm definitely intrigued and I wanted more! Stupid twenty page comics.