Vibe #5

This has the potential to be the best issue of Suicide Squad yet.

It only took five issues before Amanda Waller lost all control of Vibe and had to send the Suicide Squad after him. She is one impatient asshole. Too bad the Squad doesn't have an additional member like Air Wave or Shockwave or Tidal Wave so there might be some tension from the possibility of a member dying. But if it's just King Shark and Deadshot and Harley Quinn, nobody is going to die. Except maybe Agent Gunn's husband! He seems pretty dispensable after the big ring controversy from last issue.

Vibe is currently trying to save Gypsy from being taken by ARGUS. He's seen enough of ARGUS and their secretive ways to know they're not telling him the whole truth about the Breachers. Plus he had that half of a message delivered to him by the first Breacher that seemed to be pretty important if a bit mysterious being that it was half of a message. Plus Gypsy is really pretty, so you have to believe the pretty girl is innocent and the soldiers with the guns and the violence are not very innocent at all.

To make sure ARGUS can't trace him and Gypsy as they light out for the territories (the territories being a secret place where Vibe is going to meet up with his brother Dante), he destroys any piece of ARGUS technology he has on him.

Rules Violation! Vibe should be blurry and indistinct in the video feed!

Gypsy explains to Vibe that her wicked stepmother kicked her out of the caravan for making a bad trade. So her tribe left without her but her father has been sending messages to her every time the tribe entered a new dimension. So Vibe believes he can find Gypsy a portal back to her family.

Vibe fiddles with his Vibration Vision and realizes he can see Interdimensional Portals all over the city. But he's laid low from the pain caused by using this power and Gypsy can think of only one way to distract him so he can stop focusing on his powers.

Vibe the Living Sex Toy!

And then the Suicide Squad attacks! Goddamn cock blockers.

The best part about their appearance is that a guy named Crowbar is hanging out with them! Yay! Crowbar is going to get his ass killed! I know Vibe won't kill him and I'm pretty sure Gypsy won't either. I bet Deadshot kills him. Gypsy will disguise herself to look like Crowbar and Deadshot will put a bullet in the real Crowbar's brain! And then that'll mean Sterling Gates killed just as many members of the Suicide Squad as Adam Glass did!

But first the Suicide Squad has to actually do their job well! Deadshot shoots Gypsy in the shoulder which causes her to say 'fiddle sticks' in Runespeak and which puts King Shark into a blood frenzy. As he's about to eat her, Vibe fails to save her because he gets hit in the back of the head by Crowbar's crowbar.

Let's take a moment to discuss Crowbar. Is this guy a member of Sixpack's Section Eight? Who picks up a fucking crowbar and thinks, "Holy damn! I'm a fucking Super Villain!" Maybe the Crowbar is the one used to kill Jason Todd and it's gained a demonic sentience, imbuing the wielder with super strength, invulnerability, and bad one-liners.

Is his sister back home in Ethiopia?

Crowbar's crowbar (help me please don't make me say that anymore) absorbs Vibe's powers. It can apparently redirect the power as well but Crowbar just keeps building up more and more power. There's a huge blast of power from the feedback and Crowbar disappears. His crowbar doesn't though. He's probably not dead though. I'm sure he was just blasted into another dimension. But is he an interesting enough character to rescue from that dimension? Probably not. So he's dead. Or maybe he's now the sentient presence in the crowbar! Because his name is Crowbar and now he's actually a crowbar! That's probably the way that went down.

The feedback also knocked Vibe silly and Deadshot knocks him unconscious with one more punch. Now they just have to find Gypsy since she was knocked free from King Shark's grip in Crowbar's power release.

Nobody would have let King Shark carry a deliciously edible person anyway.

Vibe and Gypsy wake up back in The Zoo. Agent Gunn isn't happy about it. Dante knows his brother is in trouble because he never arrived at their rendezvous. And Agent Gunn gets a dressing down from Waller. Amanda's next big project is to find a replacement on the Justice League of America for Vibe. If that happens, they'll have to change the title of this comic book from Justice League of America's Vibe to Now Nobody Has a Reason To Keep Reading Vibe.

Vibe #5 Rating: +1 Ranking. That ranking was actually for the Suicide Squad. How come they work so well as a team when they're in somebody else's comic book? That's the opposite of what usually happens. Maybe because they're bad guys, they have to fail and suck in their own books but they're allowed to defeat the protagonist of other titles since heroes always have to rise up after being defeated to truly be heroic. So the Squad served their purpose and moved on. And a Suicide Squad member died! Sure, he was some nobody named Crowbar using a magic crowbar imbued with the demonic energy of the murder of Jason Todd. But that's probably why he was killed. Because the Magic Crowbar is the important half of that villain team.