Friday, February 10, 2012

Batman and Robin #5

If Robin and Nobody kill Batman, I won't ever find out how The Court of Owls storyline ends!

Batman finds this note out by the family grave where we last saw Damian approached by Nobody.

I would expect Bruce Wayne's bluetooth earpiece to be much smaller than a normal one. Unless Waynetech makes mostly normal technology as a cover for all of the Batman super high end gadgets. And since Robin left the note where we last saw him, does that mean Robin keeps a pocket printer on hand for these occasions? Or else he was trained in Grandmaster Font Writing and Ignoring Paper Folds. Or else the note was pre-typed up by Nobody and left there to make Bruce think Damian went with him of his own volition but was actually paralyzed and dragged away. Drug away? English is hard. I think it's probably 'drugged away' because he was both filled with toxins and removed by force!

While snooping in his room, Alfred finds a big book of Damian's drawings. The drawings are of different Bat-Villians being killed in various ways. Unless this wasn't done by Robin either! Maybe Alfred planted it!

If this were a Hollywood movie (and it might be! If nobody is lucky!), Batman will save Robin. But Robin won't want to be saved. And during the climactic battle, Nobody will do something to show he never gave a shit about helping Robin and has only done this to Robin to get back at Batman. This point in the climactic battle will have Nobody about to strike the death blow on Batman while Batman mutters what he thinks will be his final words: I love you, son. And Robin will become enraged and strike down Nobody! But Robin won't kill Nobody! He'll win the fight and turn and walk away and the audience will know that Batman has won Robin back! But it'll still be a long road ahead and everyone should expect plenty of sequels!

But since this is a comic book, let's hope it doesn't get all mushy with crap like that!

When I posted the excerpt from my Places & Predators Sidekick Manual, I was really looking for the text where I discuss how Robin is just a decoy for Batman. I still can't find where I discussed it so I'll just start again.

Did you ever wonder why Robin's costume is bright and flashy? Batman is dark and hides in the shadows and can't be seen very well. So the bad guys can't even find him to hurt him. But then this kid in a bright yellow cape with a bright red shirt and glowing pale legs sticking out of bright green underwear comes sailing down from the rooftops and now you've got something to shoot at! But while you're distracted and almost killing Robin, Batman has time to safely take you down without risk of bullet induced injuries! What a big bat jerk!

So Nobody takes Robin on a mission to murder the famed Bat-villain, the Oscar Wilde Headed Man!

He does dastardly crimes while saying paradoxical things in poetically profound ways! Like "A bad bank robbery will see Batman crash the party." And then he sips from his drink and says, "But a truly great bank robbery must have Batman as an invited guest!" And then everyone chuckles and laughs and drinks some more.

Batman is off hunting for Robin before Robin can finish this action:

I suspect Nobody chose this guy because of the size of the test head.

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