Steel doesn't look like he's enjoying this brutal beating too much.
We may be in luck! The issue begins with one of them French sexual positions.
Of course Batman is one of those assholes that insists on playing Devil's Advocate for everybody's own good.
Pretty soon, Mongul's son Jokey arrives with Warworld to avenge his father and punish the Earth. He encounters Superman first and asks if he's the one that defeated his father. Superman tugs at his collar, swallows hard, and says, "Well, not the only one! That Bat guy is to blame too! If you really need to destroy something to feel better, may I suggest Gotham City? Don't tell anybody I said this but it really is a pit."
Instead of grabbing Jokey by the throat and throwing him out of the solar system, Superman says, "You have two minutes to leave." Jokey checks his watch and says, "Earth minutes or Warworldian Computational Bitpoints?" Unless what Jokey actually says is, "Let's not fight on Earth because, unlike you, I don't want to hurt any humans or damage any of your buildings. But I would like to kick that Batguy's ass as well. So why don't you guys pack a lunch and meet me on Warworld tomorrow. Bring some family members along. We'll make a day of dealing death." Superman readily agrees for everyone because fuck that asshole Batman and his Batfamily and their stupid desires.
Superman and Batman are not killers. No matter what their opponent is up to, they always try to figure out a way to stop them without ending their lives. Sure, maybe Batman gets a little out of hand sometimes and nearly kills them. And maybe Superman doesn't have a problem locking them away in The Phantom Zone for eternity without a fair trial. But at least they're not breaking the letter of their ethical law! They never actually stop a heartbeat! They're pure as the driven snow and shit! Except now that they're facing Jokey, Son of Mongul, Inheritor of Warworld, they're beginning to equivocate. Superman chooses Supergirl but kind of makes sure that Wonder Woman is around so that Wonder Woman can tell Supergirl to kill if she needs to because Superman won't. And Batman heads off to bring along Red Hood because he knows Red Hood will kill if he needs to and Batman might decide to look the other way this time. So good job, Greg Pak! You really know how to make these characters shine!
Superman's second choice is Steel and Batman's second choice is Batgirl. So maybe they're second choices are actually to keep their first choices in line. That way if their first choices actually do kill Jokey, Son of Mongul, they can blame their second choices for failing to control their first choices and thus blame the killing on everybody else.
Why you gotta make Batman look like a naive jerk, Greg Pak? Batman didn't lose Jason Todd because he didn't realize the danger they were constantly in! Batman lost Jason Todd precisely because fucking Jason Todd didn't listen to Batman's warnings like this one! What a dick.
And so everyone arrives at Warworld feeling slightly more Rocaforty than before. Things go a bit sideways once on board Warworld because they're having elections for the leader of Warworld and Jokey, Son of Mongul, doesn't have time to kill Batman and Superman now. Instead, Jokey teams up with Batman and Red Hood to fight for leadership of Warworld. And since Batman and Red Hood are mere humans, Supergirl decides she, Kal, and Krypto should also form a team to fight to lead Warworld. Which is probably why they're all battling on the cover.
Meanwhile, Steel and Batgirl have infiltrated Warworld's computer server room and are getting busy with a little high tech sabotage.
Surprising nobody, The Bat-Family winds up facing the Super-Family in the final round. The only problem is that the final round is a fight to the death. I'm sure they'll think of something. Although Greg Pak has already killed them in the previous Toymaker story arc, so maybe he'll do it again. Death comes easy to these heroes because it never really sticks.
Luckily Jokey, Son of Mongul, is allowed to kill. And he chooses to kill the judges of the competition. Hmm. Why don't they do this during the Superbowl? Take out the refs early and anything goes!
Batman Loves Superman's Annual #1 Rating: At this point, I suspect Superman really is a threat to Humankind. If he's just going to start packing everybody he thinks is evil into The Phantom Zone on his own say so, then he's become the despotic madman that Batman has always feared. He is the dictator that does whatever he thinks is right to secure he peace. He's become Darth Vader!
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