Deathstork the Terminator #3 (May 2026)

If that's how Slade sees the world, he needs a new fucking mask.

Deathstroke the Terminator #3 (May 2026)
By Tony Fleecs, Carmine Di Giandomenico, Ivan Plascencia, and Wes Abbott
Cover by Carmine Di Giandomenico
Edited by Brittany Holzherr and Marquis Draper

When we left Deathstork last issue, he had just been confronted by Deathblow and Deadshot. But for some reason not Deadborn. You'd think Deadborn would get more love what with having a fucking stupid fucking name. If I were writing Deathstork, he'd be first on my list as Deathstork's new nemesis. We'd learn his secret identity is Johnny Truant and he was actually stillborn but his mother's love and her story of his life (or maybe his Elseworld's life as some jerk named Navidson) somehow made him real. His catch phrase would be "Etch a Pooh air!" and he'd speak in multisyballic words because he'd read the Oxford English Dictionary so many times. Deathstroke wouldn't be able to kill him because he was more ghost than physical person. The only way to defeat him would be to find his mother and kill her. Or find the letters she sent to her blind friend and old lover, Zampano, and burn them. But then he'd find the real monster behind it all was a massive werewolf called Redwood! Also Deathstroke would groom a few minors during the run, just to keep his character tied to his canonic lore.

But back to reality (reality being this comic book I'm reading), you'd think with three guys who love guns and have dead or death in their name, they'd wipe each other out in a matter of seconds. But, surprisingly, these assholes talk a lot. Deathstork is all, "Who killed Wintergreen?!" And Deadshot is all, "Hey buddy! What're you up to?" And Deathstork is all, "Who killed Wintergreen?!" And Deadshot is all, "Why don't you surrender, buddy?" And Deathstork is all, "*waugh waugh waugh* Who killed my father . . . I mean Wintergreen?!" And Deathblow is all, "I love guns!" And then Deadshot reveals the big revelation! No, not who killed Wintergreen. But that Slade apparently knows who killed Wintergreen! What a twist!

I think maybe I suggested at some point that Slade was hunting himself because the guy he was after had all the same attributes as Slade (divorced, middle-aged, male, pedophile) and that maybe Slade wanted a real challenge so he did one of those Philip K. Dick mindwipes so he could hunt himself. Is that what's going on?!

Nobody would be fucking surprised if Deadman joined in with all the other Dead/Death/Noun/Verb guys.

How has this series made it three issues without somebody in editorial threatening to fire the letterer if they don't fucking change the fucking Goddamned fucking font?!

You may not have noticed this detail in the scanned panel above because of the coloring and the diminished size so I'll zoom in for a better look:

Who the fuck is Deathblow aiming at?!

Three of the deadliest psychopaths with guns and after several pages of fighting, nobody has been shot. How am I supposed to buy into this?! These guys are super good at shooting other people but also they're super good at not getting shot by other people who are super good at shooting people? Am I to believe that they're honoring some strict code that doesn't allow them to shoot other people mercenaries so instead they just punch each other in the face a few times and yell non-sequiturs?

What's outside the bounds? What's unacceptable? What code? Were Deadshot and Deathblow created by Ann Nocenti because I don't know what the fuck they're talking about!

In answer to Slade's very astute question, "What are you talking about?", Deadshot answers, "Rule #1, Slade!" Oh! Okay. I get it! They're talking about Fight Club. But Rule #1 is you can't talk about Fight Club so it's really confusing when you have to beat the shit out of somebody who broke Rule #1 and talked about Fight Club.

Deathbro don't miss, dude!

Oh, he doesn't?

Look, you can't be certain that "BANG" sound effect was Deathblow's gun! It may have been from when they knocked him backwards!

Hmm, I'm arguing with myself. I think I might have a Deadman situation here.

Christ this fight is choreographed worse than a Tony Daniel fight written and drawn by Tony Daniel. You'd think if you were writing the fight you were drawing, it'd be easy to translate for the reader. They'd see all the beats, understand how the characters are moving and attacking, easily decode the movements throughout. But you'd have to think one or two more times if it was Tony Daniel writing and drawing. Maybe that's unfair. Maybe he'd gotten better at it since The New 52. I've never felt the desire to pick up another one of his comics after having to read his Detective Comics. You remember? The one where The Joker cut off his own face for reasons that I'm sure they eventually got around to explaining.

So after five pages of confusing fighting and dizzying dialogue, the story slips into a flashback to explain these rules they're arguing over. Rules set up by Deathstork so that maybe he could get Adeline off his fucking back.

Two rules? That's it?!

Adeline doesn't give a shit about the family rule because her sons are already dead. And I guess Slade didn't give a shit about Rule #1 because Deadshot's accusing him of breaking Rule #1. I think maybe in the first issue, Slade went a little tiny bit against the wishes of the client by making a massive spectacle of the kill when he blasted out of the sixth floor of a parking garage in an armored vehicle spraying the whole Goddamned fucking city with poorly aimed bullets. Although they should be talking about Rule #2 and how Slade groomed Terra to get at the Titans and since the Titans consider themselves family, his fucking a minor went against the spirit of Rule #2. Not to mention the actual physical embodiment of, like, um, real, actual statutory rape laws.

Oh wait! There were more rules but they weren't important to the story yet! Rule #3 needs to be mentioned right around when Deadshot and Deathblow are going to kill Slade for free.

"No freebies in the limousine that's not what it's about" -- the Goddess Pink

I hope this becomes one of those comic books where we get a new rule every fucking issue for the next 100 issues.

Wait! Let's get back to Pink and her song, "Respect". I don't expect high-minded philosophical dialogue on a Pink album, especially one where she has a song about how volunteering to feed the homeless is her Vietnam. I mean, um, Pink? PINK?! Did you have nobody around to explain a bad idea to you?! Her song respect feels like a lot of trite dumb bullshit about how women shouldn't be putting out unless they're in some kind of relationship or they're getting something out of it or whatever. But there's a line in there that I think is the heart of the idea and I'm all for it, no matter a person's gender: "Respect is just a minimum." That is followed by "Go on, girl, and get you some!" So, see, Pink wants her girls to be out there fucking and enjoying themselves. But respect being the minimum doesn't sound like a bad rule to follow.

Or maybe I'm wrong? I know I wouldn't mind getting laid by some hot piece of ass who treated me like dogshit. At least I'd be getting laid!

My favorite line on the album, Mizundaztood (I don't know how to spell it or how many fucking Zs she used!) is this one: "What good am I to you? If I can't be broken?" Fuck that's great! Yumyumyummyyum!

Deadshot begins talking too much yet again while Deathblow stands there stupidly with his gun out which gives Deathstroke's healing factor time to kick in so that he can use his super dexterity and speed to leap at Deadshot and slice his guts open before Deathblow can even get an unmissable shot off. Plus more rules!

Oh! This is why they can't tell Slade who sent them or who killed Wintergreen. No snitching is in effect!

By the way, those three shots missed.

During the fight, the mysterious young person who is good with computers so maybe's it's Oracle calls Deathstork with some news: Wintergreen's body wasn't found at the scene. Some mercenary is searching for both Slade and Wintergreen and not caring about leaving evidence of their search. Deathstroke has an idea who it might be. Rose, maybe? That's too obvious though, right? Adeline? Anyway, Slade takes out Deadshot and Deathblow with a knife because when you fight with a gun, you simply expect to win against a knife. And that's when you always lose! I think there's a Biblical passage about it somewhere. If I knew The Bible, I'd find it and quote it but I'd probably spend more time flipping around the Bible than Russell Brand on Piers Morgan's show. I think it was something like "Let he who shoots the first bullet die by the sword and also Samaritans suck, man. Just the worst people. Fucking awful."

It's on your back, stupid.

While Deathstroke helps Deathblow look for his gun, Deadshot walks up and shoots Deathstroke in the good side of his face! Luckily his armor takes the brunt of the damage as it's blown apart because as we've seen before, his eyes don't regenerate. Just before Deadshot pulls the trigger one final time, point blank in Slade's face, he lets Slade know who killed Wintergreen. And let me tell you, it's not the most surprise twist ending anybody's ever read. It's the most expected thing Deadshot could have said.

"Holy fucking shit I just shit myself from surprise and shit!" is what I would have said if Batman had been revealed to have killed Wintergreen. But not Slade. Slade was the main line in Vegas.

The Ranking!
Is the killing of Wintergreen, along with the killing of Alfred, some kind of message DC's trying to send to its long time fans? "We don't need you old fuckers no more! Get the fuck out, man!" I have a feeling this entire story line is just going to be some elaborate Escape Room puzzle that Wintergreen set up for Slade's birthday. It'll end with Slade arriving at some dark warehouse where all the people he battled, as well as Wintergreen, alive and well, will pop out of the dark and scream, "Surprise!" Of course you don't surprise Deathstork like that so they'll all get shot in the face and it'll be the worst party ever, especially when Slade sees the blood leaking out of his giant cake and looks inside to see three dead fifteen year old girls in Terra costumes. Then Slade will shrug and quote Rule #6: "Never scare a man with a gun and super reflexes."

Deathstork the Terminator #2 (April 2026)

Which fucking editor gave the green light to this fucking cover?!

Deathstroke the Terminator #2 (April 2026)
By Tony Fleecs, Carmine Di Giandomenico, Ivan Plascencia, and Wes Abbott
Cover by Carmine Di Giandomencio
Edited by Marquis Draper and Brittany Holzherr

I'm not claiming I know how to create a successful, eye-catching comic book cover. If I knew how to be successful at even one single thing, do you think I'd spend the majority of my time criticizing every other artist in the world's hard work? You don't bitch and moan about every slightest thing when you're successful and content! But since I'm not either of those two things, how about I stop explaining why I'm such an asshole and just get on with being one? Good? Great!

Why is Slade facing away from the reader? Was there a mandate on all "Next Level" second issues to have the character facing away from the reader because Lobo was facing away too! Let me check Batwoman #2. Hmm. Unless the back of her head looks like her face, she's definitely not facing backwards. Being it's the second issue, I'm going to assume it's too late for the "This Character is Back! Get it?!" cover. So what was the decision to create a mostly orangish-red cover focusing on Slade's old man back?

I think I understand it but the road to understanding just happens to go through Whinelikeafuckingloserville. The problem with most people online¹ is that they get sidetracked in Whinelikeafuckingloserville and never come to terms with the thing they decided to shit on. They're so up their own assholes, believing they're the smartest piece of shit in every room and that their instincts are so great that a first impression is the only impression they'll ever need, that they misunderstand the entire world around them. But unlike them, I won't stop at "This cover is shit!" because I'm wrong about everything.

We can't see Slade's face because he's sad, guilty, and probably slightly irritated. He's removed his mask in exasperation at his failure and mourning at the loss of his friend. The orangish-red color mixed with black suggest anger and depression. We also realize that Slade's life has become so entirely focused on violence that his shower has been turned into a weapon arsenal.

He is in the shower, right? This is how I stand in the shower every morning as I contemplate the sad orgasm that just trickled out of my tired body, a metaphor for my need to find joy in life but ultimately find only monotony and despair and semen. Although I seldom wear my pants and pouch belt when I'm showering so I could be wrong. Maybe Slade's shirtless because his shirt is attached to his mask! Yeah, that's probably it.

This issue begins immediately after Slade was blown up at the end of last issue. The soldiers who blew Slade up weren't told that he's got the most powerful healing factor in the DC Universe so when he pops out shooting at them, they all shit their pants and die. Meanwhile, Slade has a flashback to "Years ago" just after he lost his eye.

Back then, Wintergreen recommended that Deathstork murder his wife. So I guess it's good that woman-hating bastard is dead!

I mentioned in my "review" of Issue #1 that I own every series of Deathstork ever published. But that doesn't mean I remember them all! But I think what happened was Adeline was angry that Slade got Grant killed and Joseph's throat cut and she was all, "I should probably hire some people to kill him!" And then she failed or something but managed to take his eye as a reminder to Slade that he got most of his kids killed. Maybe she even pulled the trigger herself! Like I said, my brain sucks donkey dong.²

Deathstork confirms a few panels later that Adeline blew his eye out onto the coffee table because Slade was responsible for their son Grant's death. So my brain mostly remembers stuff. Just not clearly. I wonder if I let too much ocean water into my ears when I was younger and it brined my brain? Stupid Pacific Ocean!

After the memory is over, Deathstork kills all of the soldiers trying to arrest him. None of them can tell him who killed Wintergreen and robbed him blind. So he shoots them all in their ignorant faces in a way that says, "Let's see Batman ignore this!"

When did this turn into a Grendel comic? I wonder if the Pander Brothers can sue for this layout?

I think those boxes were actually too big for the Pander Brothers to sue. Imagine if you could sue other people because they use your stylistic layouts? Keith Giffen would get rich off of all the other nine panel pages out there! At least until he was sued by Sherwood Schwartz³.

You know what? Ignore all that if it wasn't the Pander Brothers who did all those small box bits in Grendel. That might have been Matt Wagner himself! Man, I should probably do research before making pop culture references that my pickled brain only half remembers. Stupid Picklific Ocean!

Deathstork limps away from the base he just broke into, bleeding out and on the verge of dying. Or just passing out, I guess, since his healing is so good⁴. As he does so, he radios somebody he doesn't usually radio because Wintergreen is the guy he usually radios. The guy on the other end of the call keeps quipping and being funny and makes a joke about Batman kicking his ass. I hope it's Dick Grayson⁵, especially after he's all, "You were on a blind drop?! But that's against all ethical and moral rules! I can't help you if you're out there murdering probably innocent people and all of the innocent soldiers guarding him and two sexy young ladies too!" But Deathstork is all, "Look. Just fire up the Bat computer and get me some information about this client that just killed Alfred's best friend and stole all of my money!"

Whoever's at the other end of the call won't help Slade until Slade pays him and currently Slade has zero dollars. Which means Deathstork's going to have to go on r/INeedSomebodyKilledFast and take a few jobs to get back on his feet. But first he has to get back on his feet. Which should happen sometime after he passes out and/or enjoys a recent memory of having breakfast with Rose as she chastises him for being a murderer. But before he can finish the memory or click "ACCEPT" on the job, his safehouse is attacked by more soldiers. But that's okay because Deathstork can't be killed by normal soldiers! It doesn't matter how many guns or rockets or grenades or tanks they have because Slade has a sword!

Swords don't run out of ammunition!

Luckily for the client (but not for all of the soldiers because Slade killed them all), not everybody hunting Slade is a normal soldier.

Whew. I'm glad they put the text on there because I never would have remembered Deathblow's stupid name!⁶

The Ranking!
It's only been two issues so I don't mind that they keep teasing the reveal of the person behind Wintergreen's murder. I think most people would expect it would play out like this without a reveal but there are more than the one way to keep people hooked. A reveal at the end of the first issue wouldn't have been terrible because just revealing Slade's antagonist would draw people back for the eventual confrontation between them (assuming it was an exciting enough reveal!). That's usually my choice but I think it takes a bit more confidence for a writer to not lead the reader on. The mystery always seems like the easier way to draw people in. I don't think that's true but in this case, it's fine! The story's working, Deadshot has been revealed for next issue (and Deathblow, I guess!), and I'm even more curious about the young chin (male or female? I'm not sure!) that Slade was attempting to get help from than I am about the main antagonist! The person Slade called for help was really worried about Slade breaking a bunch of rules Slade made by asking this person for help. Does that mean this person is a young woman whom Slade is legally not supposed to be within 300 feet of?!


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¹ I could probably have omitted this word.
² Lucky brain.
³ That's a The Brady Bunch joke!
⁴ Except when it comes to eyeballs.
⁵ But it's probably Jason Todd. Which will be okay because he's not being written by Scott Lobdell.
⁶ If you love Deathblow and hate that I think his name is stupid, just replace that caption with this one: "It looks like Deadshot has fleas!"

Deathstork the Terminator #1 (March 2026)

If Deathstork were actually any good, he wouldn't need laser sites to aim. Shit. Was that ableist? Does he need them because he only has one eye?! Oh, who cares. He's a pedophile!

Deathstroke #1 (March 2026)
By Tony Fleecs, Carmine Di Giandomenico, Ivan Plascencia, and Wes Abbott
Cover by Carmine Di Giandomenico
Edited by Marquis Draper and Brittany Holzherr

• I guess March is Anti-Hero Month at DC Comics because alongside Lobo, they've also released BatmanButWithTits¹ and Paedo the Terminator. It was probably a good move because idiots like me² figure as long as they're in the store picking up Lobo #1, they might as well pick up Batwoman #1 and Deathstork the Terminator #1 as well.

• While doing a little research to see if I've collected every volume of Deathstork that exists to date (I have), I noticed that this series was Volume 2 of Deathstork the Terminator and not Volume, I don't know, 3? 4? of simply Deathstork. In essence, this is a sequel to the early '90s series where Deathstork got to participate in Total Chaos and was almost outshined by a ginger troll from the future who loved to say, "Cheese this!" Boy, wasn't that an exciting time for Titans fans! Evil Nightwing! Rapist Mirage! Terry Long creeping out another generation of teenagers! Terra back to tempt Paedostork!

• I'm going to read this entire comic book while picturing everybody naked. Especially if Wintergreen is in it. I mean Rose Wilson! I fucking meant Rose Wilson!

• Oh, I'd also like to point out that I think Rose Wilson is 50-something so don't start talking about pots and kettles, you jerk! Rose was conceived while Slade was in Vietnam, right? So, you know, do the math! I mean, have your smart phone do the math! We're "All In", baby, and that means whatever happened in the DC Universe happened! Rose Wilson just looks young because she's full of super soldier semen. I mean serum.

The DC Wiki has a long list of Rose Wilson's powers but "talking while drinking" isn't one of them. I should update it!

• I wonder how many times Billy and Alfred have stood around smoking cigars and shaking their heads as they watched their "Masters" beat the shit out of each other? I bet they're best friends!

• Why's everybody in the Deathstork universe have white hair?

• Oh, I should finish Rose's thought for her from that last panel! She finishes her statement with "He's a killer." Well, I'm glad somebody isn't delusional about Slade Wilson! I mean, she's delusional in that she probably doesn't think he's a Paedo but, well, you know. All in, baby!

• I've often had people scream at me online in their defense of Deathstork, claiming he's not a pedophile at all. But did you read that part about how I have every single run of Deathstork comics?! You can like the character and still acknowledge that he knowingly groomed and fucked an underage girl. And don't buy into Marv Wolfman's whole thing about Terra seducing Slade! Marv had some weird ideas about older guys and younger women. Also weird ideas about demons from other dimensions that super loved rape. He also once looked me straight in the eyes and said, "There will be an animated Elfquest movie." Okay, maybe not straight into my eyes and more like straight into the ears of everybody in the room at that panel at Comicon. But it felt like he ripped out my soul when that movie never materialized.

• Why was Marv Wolfman talking about an animated Elfquest movie? I don't remember the particulars but I think he was involved with the Pinis somehow trying to get it done. I don't think I'm remembering that wrong although I very well could be. I should also blame the Pinis for ripping out my soul but then they didn't create Terry Long so I can easily forgive them.

• Later that evening, Deathstork's on a job to murder somebody for money. He doesn't know who he's murdering for money because he gets extra money for murdering unknown people because it's harder to look Batman in the eye and say, "I'm not a villain! I'm an anti-hero! Like your dead sidekick!" Because you can't have the word "hero" anywhere near your name if you're fucking underage girls. I mean if you're murdering people without any knowledge of the people you're murdering. He's just taking the word of a person with a bunch of money that he's murdering a terrible person. Hell, maybe Slade doesn't even have to tell himself the world's a better place because he killed somebody. He just has to know the numbers keep going up in his bank account.

Oh look! Slade's actively making the world a worse place by killing a whistleblower!

• The typeface used in this series is going to drive me fucking batty. It's just too small! When I shrink a longer panel down to 600 pixels to fit within my blog's boundaries, it becomes really hard to read. Stupid Wes Abbott! Use Bold Arial or something so I can see it clearly!

• To make sure this first issue is super exciting, Tony Fleecs writes in a scene where Deathstork rides atop an armored car as it crashes off the eighth floor⁵ of a parking garage and into the middle of a special forces escort protecting his target. Slade's left hand holds his staff which is pressed down on the accelerator of the vehicle leaving him to shoot his semi-automatic rifle one-handed. He can do all of this because he's a super soldier and also because he's a comic book character but mostly because Tony Fleecs sat down to write this script and thought the answer to the question, "Should this be in any way believable, even as a comic book?" was "No! No! By all the Gods in Heaven, NO!"

• Deathstork explains to Wintergreen that the people he's killing who were just paid to protect a whistleblower don't mean anything to him. He doesn't hate them. He doesn't pity them. He barely even thinks about them as he cuts them all down and ends their one and only existence. But he does despise the people who pay him to kill people because they're all, "Do it this way! Don't do it this way!" Wintergreen is all, "I think that's what's called 'being employed'?"

• I'm glad to see Fleecs writing Deathstork as the sociopath he truly is. The only problem with having a monthly comic book about a villainous sociopath is that there's no motivation other than to watch them be awful monsters. That's why the bartender in Lobo #1 had that bit about some "honorable reason" needing to be "shoehorned" into their motivations. There's a big difference in an anti-hero monthly and a villain monthly. I thought I would enjoy Giffen's Eclipso monthly back in the early '90s and, hoo boy, let me tell you: booooooooooo-ring. Just nowhere to go, man! Aside from Eclipso walking around outside the panels on the pages, there wasn't much more to enjoy. Hopefully Deathstork, having a bunch of human connections in his life that he has to navigate, will allow for more drama and story fodder. Eclipso was just sitting on the moon being mad at stuff.

• Although as I say all that, I'm sure Deathstork will have some weird change of heart when he sets his eyes on the client for the first time. Probably be a clone of himself or something and he'll be all, "Wait? What?! I have to kill myself?! But, but, existentialist crisis!"

Well, if these are the kind of self-preservation at any cost assholes that Deathstork's killing then I'm not going to think much about them either. Have fun, Slade!

• During Deathstork's assault on the compound where the target's being held, he's mentally composing a letter to Rose to apologize for being a murderous piece of shit father. I threw in the "murderous" there to distinguish him from all the other piece of shit fathers out there who didn't have to resort to murder to be truly awful. Deathstork's barely exceptional even if he got two out of his three kids killed. Lot of deadbeat dads out there who'd rather hate other men than love their kids.

• Deathstork kills a lot of random men and then he's knocked to the ground by a couple of non-random women.

Weren't these two in Resurrection Man? Enh, I'm probably thinking of somebody else and somebody else.

• Deathstork sets up these women and their "Body Doubles, bitch!" entrance by saying this: "Wintergreen, I've only got one eye . . . how is it that I'm seeing double?" But that would only work if the two women in Body Doubles looked identical. Which they absolutely don't. Which means Tony Fleecs only wrote that line to set up their "Body Doubles, bitch!" introduction to Slade. This is worse plotting than having an assassin ride an armored car through the air while shooting a semi-auto rifle with one hand!

• The dark haired woman of the Body Doubles duo probably shouldn't be dressed so Lolita-esque because now Deathstroke is going to want to fuck her.

See?! He's so gross! I can't wait to buy more of his comics!

• Wintergreen gives Slade some intel on the women in Body Doubles. They're names are Carmen Leno and Bonny Hoffman. They have healing factors. He doesn't give their ages which Slade wouldn't give a shit about anyway, I guess, so, well, Wintergreen knows the important stuff to pass along.

• One of the Body Doubles stabs Slade in the heart which causes him to see his life flash before his eyes. Grant. Joseph. Adeline. The young girl he groomed. You know, Tara! Say her name, right?! TARA! Was Tara Terra's actual name? Seems like a bad choice. Especially since she was a famous princess and everybody would be all, "She seems familiar?" Then she'd be all, "I'm Terra!" And everybody would be, "Oh! Yeah! Tara Markov! That's why she looked so familiar!" And she'd be all, "No, no! I said, 'Terra!' T. E. R. R. A. Dammit!"

• Slade remembers that he has a healing factor and stops seeing his life flash before his eyes. Then he stabs and shoots the Body Doubles before kicking in the door leading to his actual target. Who will it be? What will be the big reveal?! A Caucasian father! Divorced. Three kids! Will it just be a fucking mirror?!

Surprise! It's Alfred's best friend!

• I hope that note is from Batman! But it's probably from Red Hood. Or, you know, Rose, maybe? Would Rose do this to Wintergreen? Of course she wouldn't! It's got to be, um, resurrected Joseph! Or resurrected Grant! Or resurrected Adeline! Or resurrected Tara! The only suspects Deathstork knows are all dead.

• It could be Memento Slade Wilson! Maybe he's trying to get himself to feel anything at all by taking a fuck-ton of Ambien every night so that he disassociates and then gives himself terrible experiences to ignite his feeling sensors! Seems like a lot of work when he could just go out and rent Pig.

• Wintergreen has been dead too long for Slade to do the kissy kissy of life on him. Later, Slade discovers that all his accounts have been drained of cash. His Gotham Bank account. His Deathstork, Inc account. Even his account at the Bank of Markovia which seems a little, um, inappropriate. Why's he gotta bank there after all this time?!

• So somebody used Wintergreen to steal all of Slade's money because Wintergreen had access to it all. If this were a movie, it would have to be Rose because she's the only other character in the comic book. Aside from Body Doubles but I think they were just there to establish some early nemeses for this ongoing series. Deathstork versus two nubile women who also have healing factors! So paedo!

• The issue ends with the person who has been talking to Deathstork this entire time pretending to be Wintergreen saying, "Tick tick, Slade." Then the room explodes. Slade lives but he ends his internal missive to Rose saying something like, "You said I was a killer. But now I'm worse than a killer because everybody stole everything from me and Wintergreen, who kept me in check, is dead and I haven't groomed a young girl in a long time! The world is going to rue the day, bitches!" That's when I stood up and applauded!

The Ranking!
How was this this good? Did I forget DC could publish good new comics after injecting my veins with Pure New 52 for five years (or was it six? How long did they give it before they were all, "Can we get Superboy to punch this universe too?"). I imagine whoever just pissed off Slade won't be the most exciting reveal when it happens (unless it's Batman. I mean, that would be a fucking twist, right? Maybe it's Alfred! Or is he still dead? All in, right?!) but I think I'll continue to get this series for at least one more issue. I love loving Deathstork! I've got to admit, knowing he's a paedo makes it a little bit more exciting. It's like, "Why do I like this character so much?! I'm so naughty!" Also maybe Tara was 28 and just pretending to be 14. If Hal Jordan could have his paedo tendencies retconned with comic book nonsense, Deathstork can too, right?! Maybe Tara was a Durlan who was actually three hundred years old. That would mean she was basically the paedo! Fucking Tara. So gross!


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¹ I was going to call Batwoman "Mature Batman" because in The New 52, any book in which the main character was a woman who had sex, it received a Mature Rating. Robin was over in Batman and Robin cutting off heads left and right while Batman tsked at him but did that get a Mature Rating? No sir! That rating was saved for Catwoman enjoying a good frolic and Batwoman scissoring or whatever lesbians do in bed. I'd probably have a better idea if I knew what a woman's naughty bits looked like. I hope the term "scissoring" isn't a visually descriptive term because now I'm fucking terrified.³
² You know. Mindless guppies.
³ Oh wait! I forgot to finish my point about calling Batwoman "Mature Batman"! I didn't do that because I noticed that Batwoman #1 was rated "13+" while Deathstork #1 and Lobo #1 were rated "15+". So has DC finally realized that graphic depictions of violence are more harmful⁴ than women having a fulfilling sex life?
⁴ The term "more harmful" here just means "possibly could cause people to complain if they found their five year old reading it" and not actually "harmful" in any fucking sense of the actual meaning of that fucking word at all. Although by that definition, I think I agree with The New 52 DC in that people would probably complain more about Catwoman having an orgasm while unmarried more than Robin cutting off a terrorist's head.
⁵ That's a guesstimate!