Batman: The Dark Knight #9

Oh yeah! Teen Titans were doing a crossover of their own so Red Robin needed a comic book title to fight a talon of his own!

Judd Winick, writer of the best Night of the Owls comic so far, Catwoman, is writing this issue so maybe it'll be a decent Night of the Owls' story. At least David Finch isn't writing it because the comic has been terrible up until this point.

And then again, maybe this comic is just full of bat-crap. Yes, I know that would be guano. But I wanted to use the format "bat" and "noun". This issue begins with the Talon that stabbed Lincoln March in the chest getting shot in the head.

I wish it really were your last thought, Mr. Talon. But there are still 18 more pages of comic. So, continue.

Immediately after the Talon Narration Boxes, "It is my last thought", he then starts another story with, "I began at Haly's circus." Have I mentioned how much I hate the way the writers use the Narration Boxes? I once likened it to Lester's narration in the movie American Beauty. And now it is exactly like that! The dead Talon is going to narrate a new story. Everyone tuck into their popcorn and milk duds and let's enjoy the show.

This Talon's name was Alton (oh! oh! So creative, Writer Judd Winick!) and the ringmaster burned him alive in a mobile trailer to teach him how to be a talon and to not fear walking on the high wire. I'm not sure how the one thing was meant to help with the other thing, but the Ringmaster seemed proud of Alton when he emerged still living from the inferno.

This Talon was working while Dick Grayson was still training in Haly's Circus with his parents. But he was already old and making mistakes. Batman beats him up one night and he's retired by the Court of Owls. I don't know which Talon takes over (if any) since Dick was being groomed to be the next Talon and he was still in the circus with his parents. Since he never became the new Talon, did this mean that no Talon existed for a number of years? Or did the Court of Owls bring William Cobb out of retirement to cover for his ancestor Grayson who bailed on the job? It would make sense having no Talon in Gotham during most of Batman's career. This would have caused the Court of Owls to keep a low profile and keep Batman from hearing much about them.

This Talon was killed by Lincoln March. But he regenerates enough to attack Batman when Batman comes to save Lincoln. But Batman kills him again by kicking him out of a window. And then Batman continues after the Court of Owls because Lincoln March gives him enough information to finish this whole crossover in the Annual. But the Talon that Lincoln just killed which Batman then thew out of the window and killed again, comes back to life yet again. I don't know if that Talon will appear again in the Annual or in the Talon Comic Book that begins in Spetember. But whatever happens, Red Robin doesn't do shit in this comic book. So why the fuck is he on the cover fighting a Talon? Fuck you, DC. Get your act together already!

Batman: The Dark Knight #9 Rating: -1 Ranking. This comic might not as well have been published. The story sucks. The story has nothing to do with anything. The story doesn't help understand anything going on in Batman's life. This comic is just a waste of time and 399 pennies. It is the worst.

Batman: The Dark Knight #8

I asked in another commentary why Batman has so many Wonderland foes. And now we get to see them all together! Maybe Finch and Harris will "make up" some new ones. I put make up in quotes because I really meant steal or plagiarize or borrow without asking.

This is my last issue of the New 52 until I'm technically caught up. Technically because it's currently May 31st and the only comics left in the stack came out in this May! Technically because that means I still have 50 regular issues and 2 Annuals left to read (I'm actually caught up on Batwing and Justice League International. This probably means I'll rush through the commentary on this one. Except it's about Wonderland, one of my favorite places, so maybe that won't happen.

First off, the cover gives credit to David Finch and Richard Friend. But that's all they did was the cover. The interior pencils are by Ed Benes and the inks by Rob Hunter and Jack Purcell. Just one of many editorial fuck ups on DC's part.

Commissioner Gordon calls Batman to take a look at a crime scene before the regular police get their hands on it. It's in the subway and dozens of corpses litter the platform and the train. And they all apparently killed each other and/or themselves.

Gordon continues to be hassled by Forbes, the idiot in Internal Affairs. Forbes has gone to the mayor and requested that Gordon undergo a psychological evaluation and Mayor Hady agreed. Gordon is a little bit pissed about it.

So the two parts of the story are tying together neatly with the title of this issue, "The Madness."
The Gotham subway is full of old closed-off tunnels which Batman has decided to investigate. The first foes he encounters are Tweddle Dee and Tweedle Dum.

Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum prepare to have a battle.

Batman has entered Wonderland and they're all mad down there. Although, technically, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum roam the lands behind the looking glass. The Tweedles are acting loonier than usual so Batman decides they're under some for of mind control just like the passengers of the subway. Alfred, who is in radio contact with Batman, fears what this might mean for the rest of Gotham. And no sooner does he voice his fear, then he sees evidence on television that other people are being affected by the Madness.

Wouldn't Batman be investigating the subway much later than a press conference would be scheduled? This timing seems fishy and contrived!

And across Gotham, Gordon has already been scheduled to visit the shrink. Now that's really really convenient! Really!

Batman chases Dum and Dee back to their headquarters where he encounters the next Wonderland resident.

Who else when Mind Control and Wonderland are involved? And the cover highlights his participation.

The Mad Hatter has the Tweedle boys positioning a radio transmission dish over Gotham. The Hatter is spreading his madness and Batman, well, Batman stops it. With a little help from Gordon who arrives in a helicopter in time to distract the Mad Hatter. Yeah, he does it that easily. Just, you know, stops the Mad Hatter.

And that's the whole story! A story just to showcase more Wonderland villains because the White Rabbit has been running around Gotham for the last 8 issues. It also, sort of, compares Gotham to Wonderland. Are the people of Gotham prone to violence, crime, and madness simply because they live in Gotham? Were the residents of Wonderland mad because of the influence of Wonderland? Or is the madness already there in the heads and hearts of the people, just waiting for something like The Mad Hatter to tip them past the breaking point.

Who cares? The Mad Hatter is a big jerk that caused a bunch of people to kill themselves and then Batman knocked him off of a building. Batman seems awfully careless with the lives of villains in these Dark Knight stories. Is that why they're Dark Knight stories? Is he supposed to be a bit more ruthless in these than in the others? This story was also just filler until the Night of Owls story in Issue #9.

Batman: The Dark Knight #8 Rating: No change. So this is the comic where the creators pull an emotion or a state of being out of a hat and then write a story based on that?

"Fear!" "Oh! Oh! I can fill seven fucking issues on that! Easy!
"Madness!" "Oh! Wonderland characters! One issue story!
"Impotence!" Yes! More White Rabbit cameos! Four issues!

Batman: The Dark Knight #7

I hope this is the real final final battle with Bane. I know Bats won't kill him, but maybe he'll overdose on his Venom.

David Finch is back to being a co-plotter which I suspect was the case for the last issue as well. I don't think Paul Jenkins has really been taking part much in this thing. I think he's just adding his name to get a bump in his salary.

Batman was getting his ass handed to him by Bane last issue but this issue opens with Batman pulling a disappearing act on the gigantic idiot. Bane thinks he smashes Batman with a rock but what probably happens is that Batman is pushed out of the way by the rock displacing the water and Batman is washed up on shore away from Bane. Probably since it really just looks like Batman was smashed and then disappears.

Batman quickly assesses the situation.

Infinitely stronger? I think that's infinitely improbable! And smarter than the Batman? Because of the drug? He's just a big dumb oaf to begin with! How could Batman make this assessment of Bane's intelligence this quickly? Batman outsmarted him by getting away, right? Batman is stupider than Bane! Oh wait....

Batman searches the one building in the area not destroyed by his fight with Superman and discovers Bane has a prisoner.

Oh, there were clues! I forgot about those. Forget whatever I said about Poison Ivy being a dead end.

Poison Ivy was kidnapped because Bane may have needed her to help make the formula but he definitely needed her to procure the rare flower used in the making of the new Venom. I'm surprised Batman is willing to just let her go. I'm not quite as surprised that he knows about her involvement with the Birds of Prey or that he knows about the Birds of Prey operating in his city. But why allow it? Doesn't he usually frown on other vigilantes that aren't part of his Bat-Family and thus under his thumb a little bit?

Again I missed something though. The Virgin Star Cactus, the rare plant Ivy gave Bane access to, was used to create an antidote for the new Venom. It's what was waiting for him on the Batplane. It needs to be ingested to work, so Batman is going to figure out how to get Bane to open wide. It would be easy if it were Catwoman who needed to ingest the antidote! Or Robin.

Batman and Bane call each other chicken and resort, once again, to fisticuffs. Meanwhile, The Flash outruns the Venom by running too hard. Or something. Who fucking cares? It's all Comic Book Magic anyway! After he outruns the poison, he zips back toward Gotham to help Batman. Superman just stands around in a cornfield in Kansas because the comic book would probably end too quickly if he headed back to help Batman as well.

Back in Gotham, Bane is still going on and on and on about fear. Geez. This entire story did nothing to actually show Batman afraid of anything. Not once was there any emotion involved in the revelations of the things Batman might actually fear. And now he's admitting to himself that he fears Bane. But he fears failure more.

This entire story might have had something interesting to say about Batman and fear but the execution was atrocious. I should go back through and read the story without reading the Narration Boxes just to see if it makes any sense. Because a good comic about revealing Batman's fears would do it without constantly telling the reader about fear over and over and over. And every fucking enemy Batman met in this story harped on fear like they were all in on it together instead of just all randomly out on sprees while cracked out on Venom.

So, where did I leave Bane and Batman?

Oh yeah.

The Flash arrives just in time to catch the vial of antidote. After which, Batman punches Bane in the throat and throws the antidote into Bane's mouth. Yeah, I didn't skip anything. The Flash never gives the antidote back to Batman to toss in Bane's mouth.

I know The Flash could have quickly given it back to Batman. But that's just making excuses for the poor storyboarding.

Batman shoves Bane off the cliff where he just stands at the top with The Flash and they watch Bane, unconscious with his Venom about to wear off, slip into the water and disappear. Batman casually says, "He'll be back." Yeah? Or he's going to drown. For someone who refuses to kill, it seems awfully irresponsible to just let an unconscious man disappear under the water. And why let him go anyway? The Flash could easily run down and drag him off to whatever prison can hold this beast. It seems a huge failure on Batman's part to let Bane go, only to cause more destruction and loss of life. Especially when Batman fears failure. This ending is stupidly duped.

And then there's the epilogue which is probably meant to be a twist (which is why I call this comic "The Dark Knight Shyamalan."

Okay. Raise your hands whoever called it that Jai was the White Rabbit? Everyone!? Well, la de fucking da!

Batman: The Dark Knight #7 Rating: -1 Ranking. That negative one reflects my feelings on the overall storyline. A concept that maybe (MAYBE) could have been interesting but was just put together terribly. Snyder's Batman deals with Batman's fears so much better than this one. SO MUCH BETTER!