Talon #1

I appreciate how this cover could easily be passed up on the shelves so DC added the "From the pages of Batman" blurb.

The first page of Talon has so many Narration Boxes, I thought it was a Scott Lobdell comic book! Turns out, Scott Snyder is only half-responsible for the plot and the guy responsible for the other half, James Tynion IV, actually wrote it.

So any hope I had for this thing just went down the toilet.

That's an exaggeration! I never had any hope for this comic book!

Calvin Rose, the first Talon to ever escape from the job and the grip of the Court of Owls, has returned to Gotham for the first time in seven years. He'd heard reports of the Night of Owls. He'd heard about the two dozen prominent business leaders found dead and wearing owl masks the day after the attacks. And he's returned to find out if he's finally free of their grip Did The Batman actually destroy them all? Can Calvin Rose finally live free from the fear of being assassinated by one of their Talons?

Apparently not.

While searching for evidence of the Court, Calvin Rose sets off an alarm which alerts that old guy in the panel above who actually seems worried that Calvin will get himself killed. And that's just about what's going to happen, as an actual Talon shows up to finally finish Calvin off. Apparently The Batman didn't capture all of the Court's killers.

You can tell he's in Gotham. That wall sure gave way easily enough.

Guess how this turns out? Calvin manages to escape! In the comic book universe, it's always nice to be the best at something! Or second best, anyway. I'm sure Scott Free, Mister Miracle, will come along at some point and challenge him to an escape off.

My guess is Scott Free is the better escapadermist since he escaped from Apokolips and Calvin Rose simply escaped from Gotham. And since Gotham has all kinds of tunnels and bridges and ferries to get you out of it, escaping Gotham really doesn't seem that impressive no matter how many Narration Boxes you use to explain how the Court of Owls designed it to be a trap. Plus, Calvin's escape from the Talon doesn't last very long. The Talon reappears to finish the fight.

At least Calvin doesn't need his wife to fight his battles for him when the escaping fails.

Even electrifying the Talon's brain apparently isn't enough to kill one. So the mysterious old man appears on the scene to dump hydrogen peroxide on its head. Unless it's actually liquid nitrogen. One thing you're learning from this commentary is that you wouldn't want me to bleach your hair!

Calvin loses consciousness after the fight and wakes up in a room with an old man. After the obligatory fight before talking scene, the old man explains what is going on.

Looks like this comic is headed for the old 13 Ghosts of Scooby Doo plot. Calvin will have to hunt down the remaining members of the Court with the help of old man Vincent Price Sebastian Clark!

Sebastian Clark's father wrote a secret history of the Court of Owls. But when the Court heard about it, they killed everyone that had ever heard of the book. Sebastian was the only one to survive. He moved to Europe and plotted his revenge. When he came back to Gotham, he had some kind of security system that he sold to the descendants of the names his father had put in his book. Through a back door in the system, he's been able to keep a watchful eye on everything the Court has done. And now, after the Night of Owls, he believes they're finally vulnerable enough to be taken down.

The 16 Talons of the Court of Owls Doo.

Now that all the explication has been done, I hope Calvin Rose simply says, "Sure! I'll join your crusade!" I'm tired of comic books spending a half dozen issues trying to get one character to trust another character before the plot can begin moving ahead. Stupid fanboys that continuously bitch and moan about how a character shouldn't have trusted another character so quickly or how it doesn't make sense for all the DC magicians to work together or some other example that I don't want to spend more time thinking about have caused many issues of comic books to be wasted simply to make a character seem more believable. I'm all for characters seeming believable! But at three to four dollars a month, sometimes I just want an exciting story to get the fuck on with itself.

Ha ha! I called it! Of course, my webcomic Dwarf Lover is based on the 13 Ghosts of Scooby Doo which is why I immediately recognized the best plot device ever.

Of course, Calvin refuses to help. OF COURSE HE DOES! But I'm sure he'll somehow be convinced before the end of this issue. I hope. He may need one more issue to have some near death experience make him realize he'll never be free until he helps old man Sebastian Clark.

Good old Sebastian "Vincent Price" Clark tries to make a logical argument for Calvin to go after the Talons. He even warns him that they now know where Casey Washington and her daughter are and may kill her to draw him out. None of these arguments mean that much. It's the final point Sebastian makes that changes Calvin's mind. "You'll look fabulous doing it."

Sebastian kept one of the Talon's suits and made modifications to it. Now Calvin is a real super hero.

Talon #1 Rating: +2 Ranking. I started this comic fairly low in the rankings simply because there was a spot available. And it's way better than the placement I first gave it. Art is good (though not as sexy as Catwoman), old man character as mentor/sidekick/information specialist, and the plot of The 13 Ghosts of Scooby Doo!