Monday, April 16, 2012

Stormwatch #6


I think Daemonites are beneath Stormwatch if Grifter can hold his own against them.

At the end of last issue, Harry the Liar escaped as The Eye of the Storm (Stormwatch Headquarters) was exploding with all of the other members of Stormwatch aboard. Stormwatch has that gate opening teleportation technology so I'm pretty sure they'll be okay.

But I guess nobody used it in time even with that ominous countdown happening. Things usually explode at the end of a countdown so, I don't know, maybe they should have opened up one of those Doors and walked away to safety. But they didn't. So they were all blasted into Hyperspace. Jenny put up a force field around herself along with Martian Manhunter, The Engineer, and Jack Hawksmoor. Midnighter was just ejected with nothing. I'm not sure what happened to the Projectionist. I think Harry Tanner kidnapped her. They seem okay in Hyperspace but since they're only in Hyperspace due to the Eye of the Storm keeping itself their via a power source that has been destroyed, they all phase quickly into real space. Which is a problem.


Geez! He's even taking Batman's lines! Except for the part where Batman has never called Superman hot. Wonder Woman, maybe. And possibly Green Lantern.

Apollo rescues Midnighter and flies him into Jenny's force-field, destroying it. But The Engineer puts up her own field in time to save some oxygen and keep them alive for a little while longer as Jack Hawksmoor talks with the Eye of the Storm's Avatar, a Daemonite A.I.

Jack tries to convince the Daemonite to pull itself together instead of wasting time fighting with him. He easily does this by agreeing to give the Daemonite AI a voice command so that it can speak with members of Stormwatch and call them "Unbelievers" and "Bags of Flesh" and say things like "Look at you, Stormwatch. A pathetic super team of meat and bone, panting and sweating as you run about my headquarters. How can you challenge a perfect, immortal machine?" Jack also promises to never turn it off.


See?! I was joking about it calling them unbelievers! But I guess that's all it really can do! They're still in control of the ship but now it gets to be a passive aggressive douchebag as it follows their orders.

Midnighter is pretty pissed off at Harry Tanner and decides to join Stormwatch to get revenge. And where Midnighter goes, Apollo follows. Or something. So the team is now set. They just need to pick another new leader now.


Oh sure! They can't detect all of the other alien shit flying around in Earth orbit but The Eye of the Storm appears for a few seconds and they detect it and determine its orbit so their weapons are locked on it if it ever appears again. Whatever!



Does it now? How about fifteen or more organizations operating covertly? Does that explain even more? And why are you talking into that mug?

The team decides to let The Engineer lead for now. Interfacing with the headquarters, Engineer realizes Harry stole a map showing the location of several hidden Stormwatch caches, some with valuables and some with dangerous weapons. So their next mission is to stop Tanner from getting his hands on these things.

Except they might have their hands full with the next universe ending cataclysm.


Again?

Stormwatch Issue #6 Rating: No change in ranking. Stormwatch has now arrived in that place where the set-up is done and now they seem to be ready to cut loose. But they're also changing writers next month so that might derail things a bit. Writers are notorious for not giving a shit about the future threads laid down by previous writers and just making up all new bullshit, myth, and history. So who knows what'll happen next?

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