Isn't Constantine's ego already big enough? Do you have to declare him Earth's last, best hope as well?
At the end of last issue, Andrew Bennett had taken over The House of Mystery and evicted John Constantine. That might be a problem for most of this issue but I have a feeling the real owner of The House of Mystery might show up to set things right. You know? Cain the Original Vampire? Now, he's not the Preboot Cain, obviously. But he very well may have the same relationship to The House of Mystery that that Cain had. Not that Cain is really much of a solution to anything unless it serves his own interests. So until John Constantine can do that thing he always does where he convinces his enemy that serving John is in his enemy's best interests, John is going to have to figure out on his own how to boot the squatters from his house.
I think these were my downstairs neighbors a few years ago. At one point I had a housemate I called "The Troll" and at another point, there was "Dead Boy."
Professor John runs into his lesbian grandmother. Virgin Bloody Mary winds up in a room full of the animated corpses of all of her previous meals. Deborah Dancer finds herself with zombified Mishkin (her lover the dog was named after). And John finds himself alone with Tig with his first opportunity to convince an enemy that serving John is in his enemy's best interests!
Constantine continues on the next page, "Well, kid...I suppose you should do something about that." These are my favorite moments when doing these commentaries. When something I mentioned earlier about a character actually proves out a few pages later. Although it can only be done when a writer knows his craft and allows the characters to be themselves. You'll never see me correctly guessing how one of Scott Lobdell's characters is going to act!
During the ritual, guess who appears easily enough inside the House of Mystery? Oh, you don't have to guess. You know I always make the right call!
I forget what Constantine told Cain last issue but whatever it was, he may have already convinced Cain to help out.
Meanwhile, Professor John's grandmother has turned into a lesbian octopus flailing on the floor. She's just a distraction anyway. Andrew Bennett is John's real problem.
Holy shit! Is that how gay sex always ends?!
This comic book might as well be the first issue of Constantine. Or the last issue of Hellblazer. Maybe it's the bridging story.
Apparently Tig is a huge nerd.