Monday, March 2, 2015

Batman Eternal #47


I suppose it was only a matter of time before Hush escaped. They probably shouldn't have been feeding him.

Last issue, Batman crossed Ra's al Ghul off the list of potential bad guys. I think he's out of bad guys to blame! He's even crossed Crazy Quilt and the Ten-Eyed Man off that list! Unless the bad guy is Bat-mite, I think Batman needs to start interrogating his friends. Is Aquaman into pranking people?

This issue begins with Selina putting up her own Bat-signal. Actually it begins with Hush conflating dreams with nightmares but Hush is hardly ever worth talking about. And since he's on the cover, this is probably going to be a short commentary.

Batman is probably still busy in Pakistan, so Julia Pennyworth puts on a mask with a bat on it and heads off to discuss business with Selina Kyle. I guess Selina doesn't know how to conduct business when she's not constantly being lectured, so she tells Julia to go away. Julia decides going away is a worse option than kicking Selina's ass.


Catwoman is at a disadvantage when her combatant drops the fuck from the fuckfighting.

After losing the fight to Julia, Selina waits to see if Julia undresses her. When she doesn't, Selina simply gives Julia the information she had for Batman. Basically it amounts to "Get ready for Knightfall II: The Return of Knightfall!"

Batman returns to Gotham disappointed that he's not going to be battling Ra's al Ghul because that usually sells loads of comic books. But he'll be happy to learn that all of his usual enemies are loaded up with toys to create havoc in Gotham. That should kill a few hours.

Batman tells Julia that she needs to contact the rest of the Bat-family and she's all, "Duh! Already did. Don't worry about it!" Too bad Damian isn't back to life yet in this series. He'd get this mystery wrapped up in the snap of a neck.

Batwing takes on the Scarecrow who is using his gift to do the same old thing he always does and spray fear gas all over the citizens of Gotham. The only difference is he's using Waynetech drones to deliver the gas. Clayface is using his gift to film a movie as Batman since he was given Batman's cowl by the unknown benefactor. And Bluebird winds up tracking down Mr. Freeze who is building a frozen family moment from the fifties for him and his cryogenically frozen wife Nora. The first two match ups seem okay but Bluebird against Mr. Freeze? What's she going to do? Hack into his cold suit? Hmm, I bet that's exactly what she does!


How do they even know who The Joker's Daughter is? When did she become notorious?

As Julia begins getting updates from Red Hood, the lights in the cave go out and she's knocked unconscious. It seems Hush asked a pal to come by for a visit. Too bad Julia couldn't stay on the line just a few seconds longer because then she would have found out that Jason Todd loves huffing farted in, used gym socks. I think that's Seeley's commentary on how poorly Jason Todd has been written by Scott Lobdell in The New 52. He just seems like the kind of guy who loves farting in dirty socks and then sucking in the aroma.

Also, Jason Todd learns that the shipment he was following was a supersuit constructed for Bane. So now Bane is extra dangerous. Maybe since this is the Knightfall sequel, he'll get to break two bats this time!


Things aren't that serious if you're contacting a second rate Lois Lane.

Hush's friend isn't revealed this issue although it's somebody who knows Batman's secrets. I'm all out of guesses. Unless it's Aunt Harriet.

Hush launches Julia Pennyworth into Gotham Bay where she'll get to swim to the city and participate in Knightfall II. Hush mentions this is the eve of destruction so this comic book must be close to ending.

Batman Eternal #47 Rating: No change. For the most part, I've enjoyed this series for nearly a year now. But forty eight issues is a little much to introduce the back of a character's head in the first issue and then tease his (or hers! It might be Aunt Harriet!) identity for what equates to four years of monthly comic books. That's a long time to dangle a carrot! Most people after a month or two would be all, "Fuck this. It's just a fucking carrot anyway!" I suppose it's better than what's going on over in World's End where we know the outcome of that comic book so there's nothing to look forward to except the day when the comic book stops appearing in our pull boxes.

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