This is a really nice looking cover. Marred only by the asshole at the top. Fuck Condor!
This issue is called "The Eve of Battle" because the Birds of Prey and Mother Eve are going to have a battle with Ra's al Ghul! So it's possibly very clever. It could have been accidentally clever as well but that's still clever. The title might also be "Eve of the Battle." It's either not very clear or I'm a moron.
Page one treats us to a full body shot of Black Canary as she Canary Screams over the side of the boat and into the wind. That's her version of making a crossword puzzle to expel the raging desire to put Condor's head in a wood chipper. I can't wait to see how Strix deals with her dislike of Condor! I sure hope this ship has a wood chipper on it!
Wait a second! How did my thoughts appear in the comic book?!
Condor learns that Kurt Lance has become a permanent vegetable! Wait. Is calling someone a vegetable insulting? It's not like they'd know, right? Does that matter? I call my mom a fucking asshole all the time but not to her face and she doesn't seem to mind! Sometimes late at night, I scream, "YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! HOW DARE YOU BRING ME INTO THIS MISERABLE WORLD? I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS PAIN AND LONELINESS!" Then my neighbor screams, "Hey Dickface! I'm trying to sleep. How about finding Jesus already?!" And then I yell, "GO FUCK YOUR CHICKENS!" And then I hear the cock of a .357 Magnum from twenty feet away and I yell, "SORRY SORRY SORRY I'LL BE QUIET PRAISE JESUS!" And then everyone is quiet until 3:34 AM the next night.
The doctors have suggested that Black Canary unhook Kurt Lance from life support so that he can pass away peacefully. But Condor is all, "No no no! Let me do that!"
It's possible Kurt Lance is just fine and Condor is manipulating the machinery to look like Kurt has no brain activity. I wouldn't put it past him. He's a huge asshole. You can tell because he wears his stupid helmet into Kurt's hospital room instead of taking it off to show respect for the dead. I mean, dying! Bah, he might as well be dead. It's not like Amanda Waller is here to save his ass.
Condor decides to go sexually harass Black Canary while she's inconsolable over her husband's condition.
Watch the hand, creeper!
Oh, she'll notice! She'll wonder why nobody has tried to touch her butt in the last half hour.
Congratulations, Condor! Hope you enjoy sobbing uncontrollably until you pass out from exhaustion!
Or she'll do that other thing where she just trusts Canary's good nature and believe in Canary so much that Canary won't betray her at all. One of those two things will happen!
Her dedication in our 9th Grade Year Book. I didn't notice the "Luv ya kid" until halfway through summer when my friend Sal pointed it out. I never saw her again. Fuck you, Condor! I hope you experience this kind of pain, you shit!
You know, I used to respect Ra's al Ghul. But he wants Condor working on his side? Ugh. Loser.
Oh wait! Maybe I like Ra's again! I see what he's doing! He's giving that jerk Condor hope only to pull the hope rug out from under his stupid hopeful feet! Ha ha! Good one, Ra's!
Mother Eve reveals that the reason Ra's al Ghul is attacking her is to find out her secret of immortality. He's tired of long soaks in putrid water. He wants to be able to live forever from within! But he'll have to win this battle to learn the secret. Which means Black Canary will have to betray her friends! That most likely won't happen. I'm about 60% sure of it.
Mother Eve makes sure Black Canary knows everything about her process and how long it takes so that if she wants to betray her, she can.
Hell, Mother Eve is practically committing suicide!
Birds of Prey #29 Rating: +2 Ranking. Finally, I'm kind of enjoying this comic book! I suppose it's mostly because Condor couldn't catch a break this issue. But I also think the team is finally involved in a story that's at least engaging their own desires and providing real motivations for their actions. Hopefully Condor will die or leave after this war, the Birds will break up for a bit, and then they'll reform with Black Canary, Strix, Skitters, and Mouse.