Saturday, March 8, 2014

All Star Western #28


What kind of quack doctor would save a guy's life after being hit by a semi-truck and choose to do plastic surgery on a facial wound that was obviously long past healed and scarred over? I bet Hex gets billed for it too.

I'm disappointed that Moritat's name isn't on the cover. I'm also disappointed that I've heard this book has been cancelled. Hell, I'm actually surprised it survived this long. It's been a fun book with one of the most interesting characters of The New 52's launch. I can still hope that Gray and Palmiotti eventually write the novel, Face Full of Violence by Amadeus Arkham.

The EMTs that found Hex at the scene of the crash believe that the accident took off half his face, so they call ahead to have a reconstruction specialist waiting at the hospital. That's all well and good because Hex's face is probably covered in blood and road rash. But if a specialist takes a look at that mess, he's going to notice all the scarring and healed over bits mixed in with the new scrapes and contusions. Although my only medical experience is playing Operation and I never took a turn where I had to reconstruct the guy's face. Although his nose really seemed inflamed. With that and all the weird shit in the guy's body, he must have been an alcoholic circus geek.

Hex winds up in a coma but not before he gets a new face put on! Meanwhile Gina comes to visit him every day for a month hoping that he'll get better. At least she has all the treasure they dug up to pay for her new life in Metropolis. And probably the medical bills. I doubt Hex has insurance.


So far this issue looks and reads like an old sixties comic about nursing. "NIGHT NURSE! The night ward will never be the same!"

After about two or three months, Jonah Hex wakes up and, well, that's about it. I guess Gina is happy. But the world doesn't give a shit. Nothing changes. All the boring shit we all do every day, we still do. One man just happened to get lucky and come back to conscious reality. Lucky him.

The doctor informs Jonah that he'll remove the bandages on his face so Hex can get a good look at the reconstructive surgery. I guess they just left the old bandages on because they needed written consent to remove them. Even though his face had healed weeks ago. "Oh, just leave it covered! It'll be a nice surprise when he wakes up! Like unwrapping a present!"

I bet he doesn't even recognize himself! Not because the scars are gone but because Moritat isn't drawing him.

Actually, the doctor explains why the bandages are still on his face right before removing them. Whatever. We know it was so the reader could get a nice reveal partway through the comic book. Unless they looked at the cover before reading and saw the spoiler about his face.


I have to say I liked him better before.

Once Tallulah sees the wonders of modern plastic surgery, she's going to want to take a trip into the future as well! She's got plenty of scars she might want touched up. Although I think she's beautiful the way she is. At least the way Moritat drew her! Staz and Fabrizio might not do her justice. They definitely aren't doing Hex justice! But then he shouldn't look good. He should look rough and drawn as if by an artist from the seventies.

Hex is allowed to leave the hospital with Gina the next day and they run into Booster Gold in the parking lot. He's finally allowed back into the DC Universe! Hex greets him by taking his hat back and punching him in the face. Is that a standard DC greeting that I just haven't been privy to? Booster doesn't offer up any stories about where he's been. He just gets right down to the business of helping Hex get home.


This sucks. I wanted to see The House of Secrets. I guess I have to make due with its appearance in DC Universe vs. the Masters of the Universe.

Check out Booster's junk in that first panel! I don't know why he's pointing to it.

Jonah and Gina find themselves in the middle of nowhere back in his own time. They also find themselves surrounded by Native Americans. Jonah tries to explain how he was raised by the Apache but it seems everyone is familiar with his legend. And everybody knows that Jonah bears the mark of the demon on his face. So they just figure he's lying and decide to kill him and take Gina. Well, if they won't believe he's Jonah by his words, maybe they'll believe him by his actions. Of course, you can't really believe anything with a bullet in your head.

All Star Western #28 Rating: No change. No House of Secrets? Come on! This story feels like a change in the plot to compensate for cancellation! Stop with the House of Secrets story and just get Jonah back to the past. Also give him a new face because one of the best things about this reboot that is just starting to show itself is that it's not afraid to change shit up. Instead of keeping the status quo for years and years, DC seems to be allowing characters to really change. Hex no longer has the iconic look. Two-face is dead and about to be replaced by Erin McKillemall. The Guardians of the Universe are dead and gone. Oa is destroyed. The Teen Titans fucking suck. Catwoman doesn't understand cats. The New 52 is finally acting new!

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