Nightwing #24

At the end of last issue, Zucco gave Nightwing a choice: team up with him or watch Chicago burn. Hmm. Looks like we know Dick's decision!

I just spent a few days in Las Vegas, my lips are super chapped, and I can barely speak. So I guess I'll read a few comic books to decompress.

Being that Nightwing was in the middle of a story when he was kidnapped by The Crime Syndicate over in Forever Evil, I'm sure they'll finish that plot up here before heading to Nightwing's Zero Year episode next month. After that, maybe Dick will be free from the grasp of his Earth 3 Bestie and allowed to continue with his own life. Hopefully in Gotham. Can we please leave Chicago far behind for a very long time now? Besides, DC, it's weird when you decide to have real cities next to their fake cities. Isn't Central City supposed to be a Chicago or Indianapolis analog? Was Coast City supposed to be Seattle? As a student of DC Comic Book Geography, I might just be at the bottom of the class. The only student beneath me is DC Comics themselves. I still can't believe Green Lantern flew over Detroit while heading from Gotham to Metropolis way back in Justice League #1.

Nightwing and his new sidekick, Finally Apprehended for Murder Boy.

Tony Zucco explains that The Prankster isn't some revolutionary out to change the city or to bring down unethical politicians or to feed stupid homeless people that aren't smart enough to have homes. It's simply about a son that lost his dad and now has severe Super-Villain Causing Daddy Issues. The Mayor and his brother killed an engineer that they had worked with on Halloween and the man's son found him dead on the lawn. The son was wearing a Prankster outfit. Too bad the man didn't have a daughter so that Nightwing could be battling a sexy construction worker right now.

I think I met a stripper super villain in Vegas this weekend. She told me her name was Princess Unicorn Pants and for $25, she'd stab me in the face and choke me. All that for $25?! How could I refuse! I wonder if that's why I can barely speak now? It could also be the cause of my spontaneous loss of depth perception.

It is nice to finally have a Daddy Issue Header for this blog since 95% of DC's characters are motivated by them.

"Where's Mommy?"

Tony Zucco points out to Nightwing that tonight is Halloween and that everybody is going to die. Are kids allowed to Trick or Treat in Chicago since they have a no masks policy? I suppose they can still go as somebody who doesn't wear a mask. Which, metaphorically speaking, leaves no costumes to choose from.

The Prankster sets the Mayor loose with the means to stop a bomb that will level part of the city. But he drops him off in a neighborhood filled with people that would like to kill him for the damage he's seemingly caused the city. I suppose that could be any neighborhood, actually. But The Prankster makes sure it's a neighborhood with people rough enough to feel no qualms hitting a guy in the face with a baseball bat. Luckily for the Mayor, Nightwing and Finally Apprehended for Murder Boy come to the rescue.

I'm almost certain Finally Apprehended for Murder Boy's battle cry is "Say you like dick! Say it! SAY IT!"

Nightwing stops the mob and sends the Mayor off to safety with FAM Boy while Nightwing runs off to stop the bomb. Thankfully The Prankster put the bomb on a subway car so it can easily be moved and dropped in the harbor. Nightwing rides the train to its destination (because he needs to be there to throw some Batarangabombs at the bridge over the harbor), jumps from the train at the last second, swims away from the blast, and climbs back on dry land just in time to be choked by Princess Unicorn Pants The Prankster.

Instead of choking to death, Nightwing decides to save himself by having Finally Apprehended for Murder Boy show up in the nick of time to shoot The Prankster in the back. Great plan, Dick Grayson! The second part of Nightwing's plan is to leave the scene before the police get there because who wants to deal with a misdemeanor fine of wearing a mask in the city? He leaves Finally Apprehended for Murder Boy to deal with the aftermath and take the credit for shooting The Prankster and saving the city.

Fine. So he doesn't take any credit. He just takes it like a good Sidekick would. There may be hope for him yet! But not for his son who will become a major Super Villain when he gets older because his father wasn't there for him.

Dick Grayson heads back to his apartment to tell his roommates that the reason he came to Chicago has come to a resolution and he's ready to head back home to Gotham City.

Oh Goddammit!

Foul temptress! Don't tell him a story that equates to Dick Grayson having found Chicago to be his new favorite place! I hate you, Joey the Roommate! You're the worst character in The New 52 so far! And while I can't remember most of the worst characters I've hated, I'm still fairly confident that I'm making an accurate assessment of your suckitude. I hope this apartment has a large enough refrigerator for you!

Meanwhile, Tony Zucco probably isn't going to jail even if he wants to because The Mayor and his lawyers want him free. So they make his family disappear so that he doesn't have a son to worry about anymore and put him back to work.

Double Meanwhile, Dick's other roommate Michael has a friend that wants to keep Chicago free of heroes. He believes Nightwing will bring Gotham's madness to it and he's prepared to stop it "by any means necessary." And "by any means," he means putting on his Ghostwalker costume and kicking Dick's ass out of Chicago. So he's got my support!

Nightwing #24 Rating: -1 Ranking. Every issue that Dick is still in Chicago, I'm going to subtract a rank from the comic book. Dick Grayson had better hope his future adventures in Chicago are super extra duper fun to counteract the automatic drop in ranks each month!