Why is there a Trademark tag on Lady Vic? I absolutely guarantee that nobody is stealing the name Lady Vic. Except now I want too!
Carmen San Pietro
The Fragrant Foul
The Purple People Leader
Now I want to continue writing The Galactic Hero Corps! That is too a thing! It was even a thing in which Dan Santat did art for it! Fuck, that was a long time ago. I should probably forget the past and move on with my life. But it's so hard! Forward movement is the worst movement ever!
Currently in Batwing: Termite Men are sucking the thought juice out of Wayne Enterprises CEO, Lucius Fox, while Batman and Batwing battle the Mother of all Termites in an action-packed, gloves-off, brawl to end it all in Gotham City. Or something like that. Have I mentioned recently that I find this comic book boring? I wish Aquaman would guest star. I have some really good fish jokes!
Semi-interesting fact: I called it "thought juice" before seeing this panel. Ewwww.
The Mother of All Termites at the end of last issue was supposed to be a tension filled cliffhanger. But it doesn't go anywhere in this comic book because Batman battles it off panel. The majority of the first few pages are filled with Luke's Narration Boxes hoping that his dad isn't dead. So seven pages later without anything really happening, Lucius Fox is safe and the Termite People have been arrested.
That may be the least I've ever said about the first half of any comic book since I began this blog! Something crazy needs to happen in this comic book soon or I'm just going to have to start making shit up.
I wish Batman was the star of this comic book!
Meanwhile in India, Lady Vic is shooting a Bollywood director through the head. She's also on a business call with someone in Rome (probably that jerk Atticus Fontaine) who has another job for her.
Batman is only worth twice as much as any other bat? Ridiculous!
Lady Vic calls the man on the phone "Charlie" so maybe it isn't Atticus Fontaine. It could be somebody else that was mentioned in the story at some point but I slept through it. Besides Atticus, who else was there? Some "client not in Rome" that the Marabunta mention to Lion's Mane whom Lion's Mane refers to as Caligula.
Lady Vic's business call is interrupted so that she can show us how shitty she and "Charlie" are with their Alice in Wonderland knowledge.
That isn't good at all, Charlie! Now if she'd asked, "Speak when you're spoken to?", you would have gotten it right. For you see, The Red Queen was the chess piece in Through the Looking Glass. The Queen of Hearts was the one obsessed with chopping off heads.
I love it when the comic book writes the commentary for me.
Lady Vic kicks Batwing off of a building and asks, "Can you fly?" That's how the issue ends. She's obviously not familiar with Gotham City because the Bats don't fly but they all own Bat-Grapples. I think he'll be okay.
Batwing #23 Rating: What am I rating? Did I just read something?