Monday, October 31, 2016

Lumberjanes Love Gotham Academy #5

Holy shit! Will somebody just fucking fingerbang somebody else already?!

The Review!
This is what people want from comic books nowadays? A bunch of nice people getting along and solving problems?! Ugh! I know I'm always complaining when heroes don't get along so now I sound like a hypocrite. But since I'd never experienced a comic book (or real life situation) where people got along and actually cared about each other, how could I have known how utterly boring and nauseating it would be?! From now on if I ever feel I'm getting along too well with another person, I'm going to punch them in their stupid face. Not even the flying skullheaded ghost monster drama can make me care about any of these Lumberjanes! This comic book also just broke a record for being the first anything with a raccoon in it that didn't make me scream, "OH MY GOD I LOVE THE RACCOON SO MUCH GIVE IT TO ME!" Instead I found myself wishing the raccoon really had been killed and made into a hat so he wouldn't have to suffer the insufferableness of all of this good-hearted cooperation! Somebody please tell me that the reason the Lumberjanes are popular is because that comic book has a lot of fingerbanging in it?

The Rankings!
1. The Sheriff of Babylon (*)
2. New Super-man (*)
3. Deathstork (*)
4. Wonder Woman (*)
5. Hal Jordan and the Green Lantern Corps (*)
6. Suicide Squad (*)
7. Scooby Apocalypse (*)
8. The Flash (*)
9. Lumberjanes Love Gotham Academy (*)
10. Earth 2: Society (*)

I probably shouldn't even include this comic book in the overall rankings since it's obviously not for me. I'm way too immature for something put out by Boom! Box Studios.

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