Legion of Super-heroes #12

I'm declaring Paul Levitz needs to give the inside scoop on Duplicate Damsel's powers immediately! Am I supposed to feel awful when one of her duplicates is killed? Can her duplicates be killed? Are they all driven off a single consciousness so that it doesn't matter if even the original dies? As long as one is left? If she were pregnant and she split into four Damsels, would they all be pregnant and capable of delivering a different child? Or am I supposed to just shut up and accept whatever Levitz gives me?

Last issue, a few members of Legion were on some planet and they were being rescued by some other members of Legion and then Comet Queen knocked out Brainiac and now they've all been captured. This issue, they'll rally and defeat the Dominators. But it's how they'll do it that remains a mystery! At least to me since I can barely remember any of their names or powers.

The captured Legionnaires have been trussed up and tied to platters. They're going to be served to the fattest Dominator of them all, Primus Dom. Somehow Dream Girl escapes her bonds first. Perhaps she took a nap and saw how she would escape in a few minutes and that dream showed her how to escape and so she does it in a few minutes. I would have guessed that Duplicate Damsel would have just made some duplicates of herself. Those duplicates wouldn't be tied up? It makes more sense than Dream Girl escaping! Unless she has some escape artist skills I don't know about.

Oh, well that explains that then!

Anyway, it kind of explains it. Apparently some Legionnaires can be held by junk locks. I would think Star Boy could have done something with his density powers. And Chunk or Chuck or Bouncing Boy or whatever could have probably expanded and popped the locks. But the best bet still would have been Duplicate Damsel simply making a bunch of herself and unlocking all the other locks. It is possible the locks somehow kept their powers in check. But with the variety of races and powers that make up Legion, that's just too much to believe even for a comic book that takes place 1000 years in the future! Okay, maybe it isn't. One thousand years is a long time.

Duplicate Damsel is the first person Dream Girl frees because, lo and behold, she makes a bunch of duplicates of herself and each one frees a different Legionnaire! When she frees Bouncing Boy, this takes place:

This is just weird. Do the Duplicate Damsels retain the same personality when created? So there is DD Prime and DD #1 and DD #2 and so on? Is the first duplicate created always #1? Or can she duplicate to make any of the personalities? Or do the personalities expire when the body goes away? If that is the case, this power is the most tragic power in the DCnU!

The general Dominators seem pretty useless. But they have created a Daxamite-Dominator hybrid which they let loose on Legion. From what I know of Legion of Super-heroes history (not much), a Daxamite can probably defeat this handful of Legion members unless they happen to have some lead on them. But if anyone of these idiots can figure out how to defeat it, I guess it'll be Brainiac 5.

Yes! Yes! I see where you're going with this!

Actually, unless his next sentence is "And then we'll hit him with a lead pipe!", I've got nothing. Brainiac 5 instructs Star Boy to increase the gravity around the Daxinator. It's beyond his powers but being that it's their only chance and Dream Girl tells him, "If you dream it, you can do it!", he does it! But that's only the first Daxinator to hatch. Several others are about to hatch and the Legionnaires don't have any back up. But Mon El has a plan back on Earth to get the proof they need to send reinforcements.

Mon El and Ultra Boy produce an ex-Legion Member who can project images from far away. She shows the council that Brainiac 5 and Dream Girl are fighting for their lives against the Dominators. Mon El and Ultra Boy fly off to the Dominator's home world. I'm sure they'll arrive months later to find their friends have all been eaten.

Nevermind. They arrive in just a few minutes.

And everyone is rescued and head back to Earth. Comet Queen returns as a prisoner for betraying everyone and acting like an asshole. That's another boring issue down! And a boring commentary as well. I just can't get excited to read about all of these Damsels and Lads!

Legion of Super-heroes #12 Rating: -1 Ranking. This was simply a big fight scene with no innovation at all. The bureaucratic mess on Earth finally gets solved long after it should have been. I think this proves that Brainiac 5 should be leader and not Mon El who just sat back repeating that the Legion's hands were tied. Until this issue when he finally decided to come up with his idea. I was so bored I dug up and reread the first comic book I ever made. I searched for some web pages about Shuteye Town. I took a break to play some Call of Duty. And I talked with my cat Judas in-between the four or five panels I could string together while reading before becoming absolutely bored. Screw you, Legion! If you can't be exciting, at least be stupid!