Monday, August 20, 2012

Blue Beetle #12


Paco's name is Blood Beetle? Why not Red Beetle? Or Doctor Beetle! I'm just going to call him Doctor Beetle, M.D.

Paco has once again flipped out and turned into Doctor Beetle, M.D. because he was poked and prodded too much by Mister Bones at the DEO. I'm really surprised that the Scarab attached to Blue Beetle's back contained an even scarier Scarab inside it that was meant to heal the host. But once it cut loose from Blue Beetle, it decided to take over Paco and now it thinks it's mission is to take over the Earth for the Reach. What kind of an upstart is this thing? It's simply a band-aid with delusions of grandeur!

Paco has a super crush on Brenda (and who can blame him? Woo woo!), so even as Doctor Beetle, M.D., he feels the need to find her. He threatens to kill Mister Bones and since Mister Bones would rather not be killed, Bones tells Doctor Beetle, M.D., where Brenda is being held captive.


Oh come on, DEO! Shouldn't you have confiscated her clothing for safety reasons? And forced her to wear Harley Quinn's old costume for, um, other safety reasons and not because I think she would look sexy in it?

Meanwhile, Jaime has headed back to his Grandmother's apartment. Since she knows it's him with the help of the fortune teller that lives across the hall, Jaime finally has a safe place to go. He manages to convince the Scarab not to kill his grandmother, somehow. I think it somehow understands familial relations after getting a quick lesson looking at family photos before Jaime's grandmother arrives. Plus she doesn't really look like much of a threat.


Ah! Bugsuit! She's attacking him! Why isn't it killing her? How does it know hugs are okay, especially when she's got a flame in her hand!

The fortune teller across the hall informs Jaime that his friends were recently there looking for him. He has the scarab lock in on the healing scarab's location. As it does this, it realizes that Doctor Beetle has been reactivated! I don't really think that should be a big deal! The Healing Scarab is subservient to the Blue Scarab. I wish the Blue Scarab would find a way to calm down the goddamn healing scarab so Paco can just act normal again.

Blue Beetle tracks down Paco and Brenda. While he's approaching, Brenda distracts Doctor Beetle with her super duper feminine charms and freckles.


Who can blame him? I don't know why Doctor Beetle, M.D., isn't totally nuts for her too!

Blue Beetle rescues Brenda and calls her by name as he does. Now is the Scarab going to have to kill Brenda too? And if she figures out Blue Beetle is actually Jaime, then she'll know Jaime smacked the shit out of her a few issues ago. And she'll believe that Jaime caused her Tita to disappear (which he kind of did. A little bit). So it might be better if she never knows that Jaime is Blue Beetle.

While Blue Beetle is distracted, Doctor Beetle blasts him in the head with his red rock candy power and then zaps him with a near death ray. The Scarab is beginning to get a little demanding with Jaime and is insisting he use deadly force against his friend Paco.

Jaime refuses. Paco will die if the Doctor Beetle is removed. But the Earth will be destroyed if Paco isn't killed. Earlier, Jaime gave he Scarab a brief lesson in Jesus Christ which will cause the following panels to make more sense.


The Scarab can do heart transplants during combat?

Blue Beetle pulls the Doctor Beetle out of Paco's chest and smashes it! I knew it was just a weaselly little thing that could easily be defeated! It then manages to reach into Paco's chest and heal Paco's heart using some of Jaime's heart muscle material. It might have been more technical than that but the bottom line is Paco is finally better and no more Scarab Sidekick threatening to destroy the world anymore. And everybody lives happily ever after!


Especially Paco who gets to hug Brenda while he's in his underwear.

Blue Beetle #12 Rating: +1 Ranking. I'm not sure why the Scarab was so impressed with the Jesus when he really only got the Cliff's Notes version of the Cliff's Notes version of the Cliff's Notes Version of Jesus's life from Jaime. I'm pretty sure he just thought his beard was really cool. Whatever the case, I'm glad Jaime has a safe house with his Abuela and that she knows his secret. That'll help stabilize him and the comic. Plus it'll be nice if rich Brenda sticks around. She might get some wrapped in a towel freshly out of the shower scenes.

No comments:

Post a Comment