Saturday, November 5, 2016

Harley Quinn #6


Your days are numbered, Harley Quinn!

My lack of interest in reading this comic book just caused me to break out a pad of paper and begin a list of comic books I'm cutting. Off the top of my head, I've got about sixteen series on the chopping block. There would be more but a few of them I'm going to ride through until the end, like Earth Too and Doctor Fate. I mean, technically those are still New 52 books so I have to read them! I think? This should open the door to me reading more interesting and better written comic books rather than having an obligatory tether to DC's bullshit. Needless to say, after this month, I'll never read another comic book written by Scott Lobdell!

I just heard my subconscious scream "Hooray!"

Harley Quinn's punk band is called GG Harlin and the Skull Bags. Why would she choose that name? I mean, I don't care about the Skull Bags but the other part of her name is going to create an expectation that she'll eat her own bowel movements on stage. I already found this comic book hard to read! I don't know if my stomach can handle that!

Harley avoids eating her own shit by murdering a spectator on stage. That's cool. So punk. Rock and roll. Whatever. Then she hurls dog shit at the crowd and the crowd eats it up. I mean they enjoy it as opposed to going up on stage and kicking the fucking shit out of her. Because punk rock! I guess being punk rock means having no self-respect?

Harley Quinn winds up at a superhero and supervillain fetish club at the end of the night with the punk rock band she's been hunting. I don't know why they were let in though because none of them are dressed like superheroes or supervillains. They're just dressed the way people dress when they want people to know they don't give a shit about the rules! I mean, they give a shit about the rules of wearing a certain aesthetic that lets people know that they don't go in for rules and don't ever conform to anything ever! I mean, except for the fashion sense and hair styles of the non-conformers! That's like totally different and shit and if you don't believe it, you can get your ass beat, normie!

The Ranking!
I refuse to rate this comic book on the grounds that it might expose my inability to remain unbiased as a comic book critic! It's possible my usual reviews already exposed that but I doubt anybody ever reads that closely. I'm just excited that I'm freeing up so much of my time by dumping all of these terribly mediocre comic books! It was fun reading comic books when The New 52 began because so many of them were absolutely terrible. But DC Comics seems to have cracked down on the truly terrible writers and now most of their worst books are simply bland and uninteresting, like Harley Quinn. I never felt like I was wasting my time reading comic books written terribly. But I always feel like I'm wasting my time when I read something that is technically acceptable in every way except in a way that makes it interesting.

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