Legion Lost #16

I'm actually curious to see how this all ends.

I'm not curious as to how it begins though! It'll be a single splash page with seven or eight Narration Boxes on it. It'll begin by introducing on of the Legion members and giving a short description of their origin and/or powers. My guess is it'll be Gates because he's off trying to save everyone with a Time Bubble.

Holy crap! Tom DeFalco changed up his style! I'm flabbergasted!

So the first page was different; it doesn't mean it was good. I really wish these idiots would stop and think for a moment about how this bullshit doesn't make any sense. They're trying to make sure Captain Adym's timeline continues to exist which means they'll save the untold quintillions of people that make up the population of the time between now and the 31st century. But by establishing that specific timeline, they're laying waste to an infinite amount of other timelines. Which means they're killing infinity times untold quintillions of people just to selfishly save their own timeline. Fuck them.

Now, I don't have a problem with them trying to save their timeline. Fuck. Might as well go for it. But don't act like you're doing something righteous! You're murdering all of that other potential, you dumb bastards!

Once Harvest shoves Adym in the Time Bubble and shoots him back into the past, he and his Ravagers beat a hasty retreat since they don't want to be around when Adym sets off his singularity bomb. I guess Adym had to make sure that he didn't set the bomb off until an hour and ten minutes passed while he sat within the force-field, otherwise he would have fucked up his own timeline or something. You know, killing untold quintillions.

Meanwhile, Superboy continues to impress me.

I hope he never breaks free from Harvest's mind control! This is so much easier to listen to than his pouting about who he is and why he was created and what could his purpose be.

Harvest and Leash teleport into the force field and pick up an item that Harvest just gave to Captain Adym. Is this thing going to be like Locke's compass in Lost? Forever stuck in a loop of time to be handed back and forth between two people? Or could it be one person?!

Good. No more fucking knowing every fucking thing that is going to fucking happen.

Meanwhile Gates is pondering coming back to help even though he knows he's going to come back to help since he told Timber Wolf he already saw this shit go down and they all die. It's probably because he ended up here when he disappeared way back in the first issue and then returned all fucked up.

Gates does return and enters the force field just in time to run into original Gates from way back when. New Gates plan is to have Original Gates get his face burnt half-off while New Gates opens up a portal to a black hole to suck Lord Daggor and Thraxx and their world ending machine into it, thus saving the world without a singularity being blown up.

Speaking of which, what happened to Captain Adym? Wasn't he supposed to blow this shit up?

And thus he goes back in time to form N.O.W.H.E.R.E. Right?

So Captain Adym ends up being Harvest. I don't like that DeFalco tried to give him some kind of motivation to be angry at the Legionnaires simply because they wouldn't help him explode a bomb though. He acts as if they betrayed him. So does that anger toward them cause him to create NOWHERE? Or does he create NOWHERE to be "better prepared" for the fight against Daggor. Does he know at that moment when he goes back in time that he's Harvest or will he have to figure that out later when he gets in the horrible accident that gives him a gigantic mouth and teeth the size of jawbreakers? Once he realizes it though, he will use his old self's motivation to save the "untold quintillions" into tricking that old self into going back in time so Harvest can continue to exist. So he'll direct events toward that meeting in the desert which is why Harvest knows what to do. Because he was there as Captain Adym and Harvest is just repeating what Harvest did when Harvest was Captain Adym. So basically Harvest's entire motivation was to make sure that Harvest existed. Just like I've been saying! Except for the part about Harvest being Vampire Tim Drake.

Finally, everything blows up and gets sucked into the black hole with Gates. Harvest and his men flee but to buy themselves time, they drop Wildfire's original containment suit which Wildfire's energy instantly fills. And Dawnstar is happy to see him even though she was free to fuck Timber Wolf if he hadn't returned. And everyone lived happily ever after. In the past.

Except wasn't Tyroc supposed to die? I think I still have a few pages left to read! Maybe he'll be bitten by a rattlesnake and keel over dead.

Dammit! I was expecting a death! Not a rebirth! Fucking Gates. You ruined my mood!

Legion Lost #16 Rating: No change. I'm just glad it's over. I kind of like the Harvest/Captain Adym thing but let me list the problems with it. First off, Captain Adym is just a brand new character dropped in to become Harvest. That's never any fun. Second off, just because Captain Adym is from the future, it doesn't mean he should know every fucking thing that happens as Harvest. He should know the things Harvest does when Captain Adym was around Harvest because he observed those. I guess Captain Adym just studied all of history so closely that he knows everything that ever happened. What a nerd!

I do kind of like that Captain Adym is a piece of Captain Atom and Captain Atom has a history of becoming a villain! Remember when he turned into Monarch? No? You don't remember that? Oh yeah! That's because DC changed their fucking Armageddon storyline so that it made no sense simply to surprise readers once the Captain Atom is Monarch bit was leaked. So maybe that's going to happen here too! Maybe when it comes time to really show Harvest's origin, DC will decide too many people know it's Captain Adym and they'll make it Vampire Tim Drake instead!