This cover is a representational metaphor of the ending of the last issue. Please do not take it literally.
I'm not totally convinced that Hal Jordan didn't kill himself at the end of the first issue. He flew full force into a yellow billboard which the ring could not protect him from. Can a person survive that? Does the ring have medical capabilities that can keep Hal alive and regenerate any damage provided he did not die on impact? Perhaps the ring protected him from smashing into the wood underneath the layer covered in yellow paint so that he only received a nasty concussion instead of a shattered skull? What I'm saying is that Hal Jordan doesn't know how his ring works and neither do I.
This issue begins while Hal lies unconscious in the desert sands having very nearly killed himself. He dreams about being an experimental test pilot just like his dad. He dreams of finding himself in a crashing plane just like his dad. The first thing he says, because he's Hal Jordan, is "This isn't my fault." We know, Hal. We know. Nothing is ever your fault. You're the most responsible man in the galaxy. You're the strongest willed with the least fear. You're not pining for Carol Ferris. You're not a complete loser at your place of employment. And you totally don't have a drinking problem. Those are all things that other people, who don't know you very well, accuse you of. You are the fucking man. You are Hal Jordan, Green Lantern!
This issue begins while Hal lies unconscious in the desert sands having very nearly killed himself. He dreams about being an experimental test pilot just like his dad. He dreams of finding himself in a crashing plane just like his dad. The first thing he says, because he's Hal Jordan, is "This isn't my fault." We know, Hal. We know. Nothing is ever your fault. You're the most responsible man in the galaxy. You're the strongest willed with the least fear. You're not pining for Carol Ferris. You're not a complete loser at your place of employment. And you totally don't have a drinking problem. Those are all things that other people, who don't know you very well, accuse you of. You are the fucking man. You are Hal Jordan, Green Lantern!
So heroic.
Hal tries to work out why he couldn't defeat a billboard but between the concussion and being absolutely ignorant on his new jewelry, he can't figure it out. He decides maybe he'd better not fly for now and instead hitchhikes back to town.
I wish this car had been yellow.
If the driver of this car hadn't been wearing his seatbelt, it wouldn't have been Hal's fault that he smashed his ribcage against the steering wheel and flew through the windshield, his decapitated head slowly rolling to a stop at the feet of a bewildered young coyote because remember when we learned earlier that nothing is Hal Jordan's fault? Reading comprehension matters, kids! Especially when you make up as much shit as I do while reading.
Hal gets a ride to the hospital where he bathes his friend Andy in the light of his ring to try to heal his paralysis. If the ring rots human flesh at large levels of exposure or creates cancerous tumors in soft organs, Hal wouldn't be responsible. How could Hal have known? Not his fault. Stop trying to make everything his fault. Especially all the stuff that definitely hasn't happened in this comic book but I keep speculating could have happened. Sure, Hal's a careless, selfish prick but, somehow, through the luck of the draw, he's not a murderer and a cancer causer. At least I don't think he's the latter one. Has anybody followed up on Andy thirty years on?
Hal gets a ride to the hospital where he bathes his friend Andy in the light of his ring to try to heal his paralysis. If the ring rots human flesh at large levels of exposure or creates cancerous tumors in soft organs, Hal wouldn't be responsible. How could Hal have known? Not his fault. Stop trying to make everything his fault. Especially all the stuff that definitely hasn't happened in this comic book but I keep speculating could have happened. Sure, Hal's a careless, selfish prick but, somehow, through the luck of the draw, he's not a murderer and a cancer causer. At least I don't think he's the latter one. Has anybody followed up on Andy thirty years on?
"This ring couldn't protect me from a billboard but I thought it might be omnipotent!"
The reason John Stewart exists as a Green Lantern was because Neal Adams and Denny O'Neil were all, "What if there were a smart Green Lantern from Earth?"
The cops are looking for Hal because he nearly killed a bunch of people while driving drunk. So Hal decides his Green Lantern costume needs a mask. Ol' Johnny Law be way too stupid to find him now! He barely escapes from the cops by turning incorporeal and flying through the hospital window. He then decides to float in the air for awhile blaming that stupid sign.
The cops are looking for Hal because he nearly killed a bunch of people while driving drunk. So Hal decides his Green Lantern costume needs a mask. Ol' Johnny Law be way too stupid to find him now! He barely escapes from the cops by turning incorporeal and flying through the hospital window. He then decides to float in the air for awhile blaming that stupid sign.
Hal, you big dumb moronic idiot. The sign isn't a sign! It's a sign! You know, a signifier! Of something deeper that's wrong with you!
The metaphor encapsulating the reason Hal's life has fallen apart couldn't be any more literal. He's just too stubborn to see it. While he's pitying himself, head in the clouds, an experimental Ferris aircraft passes him by. Life is making this shit way too easy for Hal. Why can't the metaphors, signs, allegories, and analogies in my life be this easy to understand? Instead, I have to smell something rotting, move the furniture, discover the dead mouse my cat dropped behind the couch who knows how long ago, and link all of that to my fatherly abandonment issues! But Hal gets a fucking sign as a sign that his life is falling apart and a plane he should be flying flying past him and leaving him behind. Who needs the ability to reflect on one's self when life just puts it all out there for you?
Hal almost causes the pilot to crash his jet by appearing outside his cockpit. Hal uses the ring to save the plane and land it safely after which he expects to be greeted as a huge hero. He's not. The pilot calls him out on almost making him crash and Hal, upset that nobody sees the hero he knows he is, and really fucking angry at that Goddamned sign, flies away saying, "To hell with you. To hell with this." That leaves everybody on the ground confused because nobody knew it was Hal Jordan so they have no idea why he's acting so pissy and entitled. If they knew it was Hal, they would all be going, "Oh, yeah. Him. What a jerk."
Meanwhile on the moon, a massive yellow space kitty dreams about crushing Abin Sur into kitty litter.
Hal almost causes the pilot to crash his jet by appearing outside his cockpit. Hal uses the ring to save the plane and land it safely after which he expects to be greeted as a huge hero. He's not. The pilot calls him out on almost making him crash and Hal, upset that nobody sees the hero he knows he is, and really fucking angry at that Goddamned sign, flies away saying, "To hell with you. To hell with this." That leaves everybody on the ground confused because nobody knew it was Hal Jordan so they have no idea why he's acting so pissy and entitled. If they knew it was Hal, they would all be going, "Oh, yeah. Him. What a jerk."
Meanwhile on the moon, a massive yellow space kitty dreams about crushing Abin Sur into kitty litter.
This guy is cute here. Later he looks more like Venom, for some reason, probably editorial saying, "Why the fuck is this alien so cute, you assholes?!"
I realized I haven't mentioned that this issue was not written by Priest. It's written by Keith Giffen and Gerard Jones. I had to check the cover several times before I was convinced this was definitely the second issue of this series. Why did Priest leave after one issue? I feel like he dropped his pen after writing the bit with Hal slamming into the yellow sign and was all, "Owsley out!" Maybe he meant for Hal to die in his story! You know how every writer needs to attempt the "last" Batman story? Maybe Priest was writing the "last" Green Lantern story (while also being the first)? It makes sense! If there's any character out there who would be reckless enough to die immediately after donning the superhero mantle, it'd be Hal Jordan! He was a test pilot, after all. And a failed one to boot, at least in Priest's story. Fuck. I really love Emerald Dawn #1 in that light!
Hal decides to own up to his responsibilities and turns himself into the police. He shoves the ring way up into his prison wallet and walks into the police station to be arrested.
Hal decides to own up to his responsibilities and turns himself into the police. He shoves the ring way up into his prison wallet and walks into the police station to be arrested.
This is Hal when he realizes he should have shoved the ring into his prison wallet. Instead the cops took it with his other personal possessions.
The next issue begins, "Five years later." No, just kidding! It's just a DWI! That's basically a slap on the wrist! He could have killed people and he'd be out in no time. See, the thing about laws and what kind of prison time you'll do for breaking those laws is that they're adjusted by the possibility of a senator or congressperson being arrested under those laws. So most congresspersons know they're never going to sell crack on the streets. So if somebody breaks that law, they can throw the book at them. But congresspersons also know that there's a pretty decent chance that one day a cop who doesn't give a shit about the congressperson's position of power will arrest them for driving drunk. So a DWI needs to be easy to get out of through wheeling and dealing and, probably, bribes. But even if the congressperson has the worst luck ever with a punishing judge and a rabid prosecutor, they still won't serve that much prison time. And it definitely won't be hard time! Fucking assholes.
Also, there's still nine pages left. Hal will probably get broken out by the massive yellow cat alien. And his ring, although he doesn't know it yet, pretty much has a mind of its own. It'll find him when he needs it.
Also, there's still nine pages left. Hal will probably get broken out by the massive yellow cat alien. And his ring, although he doesn't know it yet, pretty much has a mind of its own. It'll find him when he needs it.
Is Gerard Jones writing some sexist pig cops or do these sexist pig cops reflect Gerard Jones' beliefs? You know what? It doesn't matter. Because Gerard Jones is a fucking disgusting human being.
Just as these cops are really settling into their whining about how women don't want to fuck them, the massive yellow cat alien breaks through the wall. Hopefully it just killed these two guys. They sound like those guys on Twitter who are always confessing about how bad they are at sex. "From my experience, women hate sex." "I've had loads of women and they never get wet down there. It's a myth!" "I just cum in my pants immediately when a woman looks at me because women can't cum so why should I bother?" I think two of those tweets were from Ben Shapiro.
The ring does not fly to Hal's finger. Maybe it hates him. He has to run out of the smashed cell and dig through the evidence locker to get it. Not that it helps him. I thought maybe he'd learn that his ring doesn't work against yellow here. But instead, the ring just decides, "Fuck it. That guy is too yellow. I ain't doing shit."
The ring does not fly to Hal's finger. Maybe it hates him. He has to run out of the smashed cell and dig through the evidence locker to get it. Not that it helps him. I thought maybe he'd learn that his ring doesn't work against yellow here. But instead, the ring just decides, "Fuck it. That guy is too yellow. I ain't doing shit."
I guess it could be out of juice too.
The massive yellow kitty cat grabs Hal in its paw and demands Hal take him to Oa so he can hiss at the Guardians. Hal just says, "Duh?"
Green Lantern: Emerald Dawn #2 Rating: A. Solid characterization of Hal Jordan, really laying into his strengths and weaknesses as a human being. My guess is that this is the first Green Lantern title I ever read which probably explains why I think of Hal the way I do. His human flaws probably eventually get filed down a bit so that he doesn't seem like such a stubborn jerk. I do love that, to help build the heroic side of his personality, Jones and Giffen allowed him to turn himself in and take responsibility. Maybe he did so because he knew the cops, ultimately, couldn't contain him. But I also think he's showing remorse and wants to move on. He definitely doesn't want to live a life where this incident constantly haunts him. If Hal Jordan didn't take responsibility, he'd probably wind up being MAGA. My theory is that most of the people who go all-in on MAGA have some dark, horrible secret that they've never actually dealt with and they know that if it ever comes out, everybody will see them for the horrible person they truly are. Which is crazy because if they'd only dealt with it, they actually could move on from it. Instead, they want to live in a world where they get to bully anybody whom they know would see them for the criminal (or maybe just utter asshole) they truly are if their past were to see the light of day. Trump, somehow, makes them feel exonerated from ever having to redeem themselves of their pasts. He's their garbage Jesus. Oh man, I haven't really read many modern comics. Guy Gardner isn't MAGA, is he?!
Green Lantern: Emerald Dawn #2 Rating: A. Solid characterization of Hal Jordan, really laying into his strengths and weaknesses as a human being. My guess is that this is the first Green Lantern title I ever read which probably explains why I think of Hal the way I do. His human flaws probably eventually get filed down a bit so that he doesn't seem like such a stubborn jerk. I do love that, to help build the heroic side of his personality, Jones and Giffen allowed him to turn himself in and take responsibility. Maybe he did so because he knew the cops, ultimately, couldn't contain him. But I also think he's showing remorse and wants to move on. He definitely doesn't want to live a life where this incident constantly haunts him. If Hal Jordan didn't take responsibility, he'd probably wind up being MAGA. My theory is that most of the people who go all-in on MAGA have some dark, horrible secret that they've never actually dealt with and they know that if it ever comes out, everybody will see them for the horrible person they truly are. Which is crazy because if they'd only dealt with it, they actually could move on from it. Instead, they want to live in a world where they get to bully anybody whom they know would see them for the criminal (or maybe just utter asshole) they truly are if their past were to see the light of day. Trump, somehow, makes them feel exonerated from ever having to redeem themselves of their pasts. He's their garbage Jesus. Oh man, I haven't really read many modern comics. Guy Gardner isn't MAGA, is he?!
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