I told my dad that when I lived in Santa Clara, I climbed over the fence of the Carmelites across the street from the old house and took a stone frog from their bird bath.
He said, "Good for you! I always wanted to climb in there!"
My dad was proud that I stole from nuns.
(If you're a nun from the Carmelites or a police officer from Santa Clara, this post has been a work of short fiction)