The Salvaged Hawkman #18

I don't remember Hawkman being defeated by Yu-Gi-Oh?

Last issue, Tom DeFalco actually wrote a story that allowed me to rationalize this entire series. Up until last issue, this series was just a steaming pile. It was an embarrassing, putrid growth on the backside of DC Comics. I still don't care about Hawkman but at least I'm not completely confused by it. I don't usually repeat big chunks of text from previous commentaties but I think this bit is especially important for understanding The Salvaged Hawkman.

If Carter Hall’s personality is affected by the change into Hawkman, he may have been trying to destroy the armor because he was afraid of what he was becoming. Perhaps when he first escaped to Earth, he took on a human persona to try to escape paying for his “crimes” on Thanagar. It’s possible he even used some kind of technology to forget his real identity of Katar Hol. But the Nth metal was slowly drawing out his real identity every time he wore it, possibly making him angrier and angrier. Perhaps he killed someone the night before he tried to burn the suit! Desperate and afraid, he drove out to the forest, drunk and scared. He burned the suit hoping to be rid of the confusion it engendered in him. Instead he and the suit became one! Ever since then, his memories were beginning to come back. He began investigating the Nth metal to try and combine the disparate wisps of memory floating to the surface of his mind. While doing so, he must have dropped clues at libraries and research centers that were picked up on by mercenaries like Xerxes who were searching for the mysterious Nth metal. His encounter with Xerxes alerted even more people like Pike who was searching for him because of his crimes on Thanagar. And then when he encountered Shayera, his memories completely came back and he realized how he had been living a false life. It kind of falls apart after that when he lets Shayera go and then begins hunting her again. But maybe he didn’t realize he had a bunch of questions he wanted to ask until after he sent her off into space. L’esprit de l’escalier, sort of. In a way.

At the end of the last issue, Hawkman and Shadow Thief escaped into the Shadow Realm rather than being blown to bits by a Thanagarian Buster Bomb. And it is in The Shadow Realm where this issue begins!

I had to just recheck the cover to make sure they hadn't changed the title to "The Melodramatic Hawkman!"

The Savage Hawkman can stand against any man or monster but he is ill-prepared to battle the cold! The Nth Metal can form weapons and armor but it just can't make a decent sweater.

Hawkman learns that Shadow Thief is willing to kill men bringing alien death to her home planet of Earth. She gets defensive when he questions her about killing and sentencing them to death but she really shouldn't. I'm pretty sure he's impressed by her tactics. Other creatures live in the Shadow Realm and they threaten Hawkman and the Shadow Thief. She can apparently enter the Shadow Realm from anywhere on Earth but to exit the Realm, she needs to find a portal. So they go looking for a way back as the readers get to catch up with Emma and her dad.

Emma's dad is being nice and sweet and that's only making Emma's decision to send him off to an old person concentration camp called "Rest Haven" more difficult.

Back in the Shadow Realm, The Shadow Thief tells Hawkman an abridged version of her origin. Suffice to say, she's mad at the people in charge and she no longer trusts them and now she's taken it upon herself to save the world! I think Hawkman likes her. For an agent of the Mossad, she sure does talk a lot about herself. Sure, she speaks in generalities to Hawkman. But she should know better than anyone (except Batman!) that you keep your fucking mouth shut. Otherwise you're just giving other people an advantage over you. Maybe it's exactly her training that leads her to tell Hawkman just enough so that he knows she's dangerous. How should I know exactly why she does what she does?! I've never been trained as an assassin or spy or covert agent for a secret organization that I assure you you've never heard of and if you think you have it was just the ramblings of a paranoid schizophrenic.

Meanwhile at "Rest Haven":

Yeah, science comes at a cost, Mark! Just not one that the doctor is willing to pay! So you'll have to pick up the check, buddy boy!

And then back in the Shadow Realm, Shadow Thief's other shadow shoe drops. She asks Hawkman to share his story because she already shared hers. So it was a gambit to gather more information for herself. She tells him a vague story about how she found the Shadow Skin and she tries to convince him to tell her all about his Nth Metal Skin. She's a tricky one! And slippery! And sexy! Is it weird that my shadow is turning me on right now?

Once Hawkman finishes his story about coming from Thanagar, The Shadow Thief rewards him by trying to kill him. Even though his story mostly matches her in that he was used and abused by authority and learned not to trust them. The only thing The Shadow Thief hears is that he's a stupid alien. They spar for a bit because otherwise the comic book wouldn't be exciting. The Shadow Thief may just be trying to gauge Hawkman's abilities while showcasing her ability to turn insubstantial at will. I don't think the fracas is too serious since they stop just as quickly as they began because they're suddenly threatened by a common enemy in The Shadow Realm's residents.

Hawkman takes a blow that might have killed Shadow Thief. His armor heals him but Shadow Thief is a bit pissed off that he went and saved her life when it goes against her xenophobia. I guess now that her entire worldview has been shattered by this encounter, she has to sing about the unchanging stars and jump off a fucking bridge. Or she can rescue him and leave their relationship a bit up in the air. While they could have made a good team, it seems Shadow Thief is just a bit too violent for even the Savage Hawkman. And she can't stand him because he's one of those aliens she hates, even if his goal is the same as hers. So they ramp up the sexual tension between the two and then Shadow Thief takes off.

You know what would have made this moment even more interesting to me? If Shadow Thief was still a guy.

Later Hawkman has one of those interminable arguments with his increasingly less significant other.

There it is! The ultimatum! My stance is that whenever anybody gives you an ultimatum, you always take the choice they didn't actually want you to take. Fuck them and their controlling ways!

I hope this relationship ends soon. I despise it. When Tony Daniel was writing, it was sort of a possible mutual attraction where Carter was a bit shy and awkward around her and uncertain how to ask her out. And then they may have gone on one date under Daniel's writing when the Gentleman's Ghost and the Zombie outbreak and Static's guest appearance happened (I might be making some of that stuff up. Stupid memory). But then when Liefeld took over, they were basically a couple and running around the world together because fuck Emma's responsibilities! She's in love! I guess. Whatever. I loathe this relationship and how it developed. Or didn't develop. So please just end it.

The Savage Hawkman #18 Rating: No change. Sorry, Hawkman. You just weren't good enough to justify climbing up out of the bottom rank and shoving the Teen Titans into the bottom slot. Although the Teen Titans really were bad enough to be there! These books just are not very entertaining.