Suicide Squad #2

Is Deadshot going to look through the rifle's scope with his scope eye? He'll never find his target that way.

The first panel of issue two begins remind people reading the series what the series is about. I'll be the first to admit that I often can't remember what's going on in a story from month to month. But I generally retain the idea behind the overall structure. "Hmm, my Superman comic is out this week. What the fuck was the premise of that?" So just in case you started with Suicide Squad #2 because you saw some chick with her tit flopping out of her costume and you had no idea what was going on, Deadshot will fill you in.

I think at this point in Deadshot's career, he's more known for working with a team.

Okay. Everybody understand what the Suicide Squad is now?

Great! Now maybe we can get on with the action. I'm a bit concerned the way the story went from one big torturefest to dropping the team right into their first mission and then, if I'm remembering correctly, dumping them right into another mission immediately after that. This comic doesn't just have to be about a bunch of villains constantly fighting while the reader wonders which one is going to die each month. Let's build some personalities and begin some really great character interactions and conflicts!

No no no! I didn't mean make them fuck! What is this, Catwoman?!

I'm getting ahead of myself. Currently, the Megadome or whatever advertiser the Stadium is named after is full of people. I don't know why. I guess whenever there's an emergency in the south they just shove everyone into a dome. The emergency right now is some kind of virus. The Suicide Squad is supposed to kill everyone in quarantine and secure a package from a woman. And since Waller is being so secretive with this "package" crap, you can bet the package is her unborn baby. Which it is because I've read this already!

Listening to some guy stuck in the stadium, they learn the place was actually full of people attending a sporting event. My apologies for making assumptions of the way southerners react to a crisis. During the national anthem, people started eating each other. Some people were eaten and other people were turned into people who eat people. The place was quarantined and the national guard blockaded the place. That's all the guy knows.

More like the Homicide Squad, amirite?!

Turns out the victims of the virus are turning into electric zombies. I don't know how the virus works. Someone suggests a nano-virus mainly so that a pseudo explanation of this ridiculous outbreak was sort of mentioned. And maybe the people infected need to eat other people to use the iron in their blood to create more metal parts and circuitry in the host. And why would something like this virus exist? Because some scientist just loves zombies and robots and he created a disease to make more of both! Possibly. I'm giving you more explanation than the comic book thinks you need! I think by the end Adam Glass just says something like Basilisk, an organization based on TERROR, did it! And that explains that.

The team decides to split up to find the woman's package.

No, that's not it.

Just before the team splits up, Deadshot gets some blood in his eye. Uh oh! Someone's about to turn into a zombie robot sniper! He sends Harley, El Diablo, and Black Spider off on their own to find the woman.

I think someone who hates Harley's new look should go through all of the issues of the comic and color her old suit on over her. That would be a cool project.

Deadshot, Voltaic, and King Shark fight a bunch of zombies in the other direction. Voltaic takes them all out by zapping everything. And then King Shark cleans up.

King Shark adds just the right amount of ridiculousness to the group.

The team ends up finding the pregnant woman. She turns into some fleshy tentacled monster that isn't anything like the robot zombies they were fighting earlier. Harley calls it a boss monster and that's probably about right. Maybe some game like Silent Hill where you fight devil dogs and zombie nurses the whole time and then the end monster is some weird blobby whatchamacallit with no relation to anything else that's been happening. The creature almost wins but forgets to keep her eyes on the living land shark on the Squad. He bites her head off and that's that.

Except it isn't, exactly. Deadshot cuts the living baby from her womb and takes it with him. She must have been ready to drop because she was pretty fat and the baby is just fine. The Suicide Squad is ready to leave. But how covert a mission is it if they run in, kill thousands of people, and run out again? Questions are going to be asked! Which is why Deadshot had Voltaic fry every body they came upon, alive or dead. So the whole thing can be blamed on a supervillain gone nuts.

Suicide Squad can't be immediately evacuated because Checkmate agents are flooding the area. Checkmate is still around and they're still a thorn in the side of the Squad? Anyhow, the Squad have to head into town and lie low for awhile. Sure, that'll be easy! Just put the human shark on a leash and nobody will ask any questions.