The Savage Hawkman #17

I was wondering where DC was going to stick DeFalco after kicking him off of Superboy. This seems appropriate. What harm can he do here? I actually think he'll make it better!

Hey! Did you see that caption?! I think I actually sort of gave Tom DeFalco a compliment! I haven't liked anything he's done on Superboy (every issue is basically the same issue anyway) and his Legion Lost was horrible. But he did a middling job on his guest stint on Nightwing although he turned Batgirl into a raving lunatic. And I think a bad writer that can sometimes do a mediocre job is just what The Savage Hawkman needs!

Plus I hope it's funny! Why does Hawkman have to be all savage and angry all the time?

The first page is some nonsense about a bunch of thieves that don't understand gambling who blow themselves up. I'm sure it's tied into the Shadow Thief somehow. Like maybe he gave them the bomb to crack the safe knowing it would kill them and then he slips in and steals the money as a shadow. But it's the second page that really gets things moving! Because look at this! It's lighthearted with Emma's dad joking around with her!

Oh ha ha! He didn't even notice they were gone! What a joker!

And then Tom DeFalco makes me feel bad.

Fuck me! Way to kill the lighthearted aspect!

If the Professor has Alzheimer's, does that mean he has no idea why this hot woman is rubbing her tits all over him? Do you think he's pressing an erection against his daughter's thigh here? Not only does this disease rob a person of their humanity, it also has to embarrass the fuck out of them too? At least he's still mostly himself and wants to talk about evidence he's found that the Sumerians were actually an advanced civilization. Or more advanced. I have a feeling he means with alien technology and cosmic doohickeys.

But then it's Hawkman that begins to exhibit signs of mental degradation.

The inevitable mix-up between the Narration Box voice and the Thought Bubble voice!

Emma kicks Carter out so she can spend some time alone with her father. Also so she can spend some time away from Hawkman.

Meanwhile in the slums of Manhattan, The Shadow Thief is extracting information from some drunk nobody. I guess she wasn't involved in the heist gone wrong but she's trying to find out who was behind it. So maybe one of her family members or a love interest was killed in the explosion and she wants revenge. Revenge is a big theme in The Savage Hawkman!

The man behind the explosive was...Xerxes! Oh whew! I was hoping we hadn't seen the last of him!

Xerxes' men were all killed by Hawkman in Issue #10. Or maybe killed. It's hard to tell sometimes and Liefeld didn't name any of them. So Ironsides might be a new character or he might be Tic Tac Foe (trademark E!TACT!). I don't think he's Nipslip but I'd love for Nipslip to return as well!

Having been ditched by Emma, Carter wanders back to his old apartment. He finds everything has been repaired and his neighbor, the guy that looked like Ekuar from Elfquest but with a mohawk, has been holding his keys for him! The landlord assumed his lack of maintenance caused a gas leak which caused an explosion and he fixed the place up in the hopes that Carter wouldn't sue. So Tom DeFalco figured out a way to return the comic book to a place right around before Liefeld and Tieri shat all over it. Of course it was hard to differentiate their shit from Tony Daniels' shit. But if I were forced to make a choice, I'd probably do what DeFalco is doing here and try to move things back to where they were in Tony Daniels' run. This is no longer The Savage Hawkman! It's Tom DeFalco's The Salvaged Hawkman!

Next DeFalco spends a page on introducing the Shadow Thief.

Well that doesn't clear up anything! She must be tearing the shadow skin from her vagina in that final panel.

Hawkman's Nth metal now reacts to Thanagarian devices being activated within his vicinity. It changes him into Hawkman and a seemingly (somewhat) different personality. Perhaps DeFalco is going to try to make sense of the seventeen issues of sticky mess that came before this? I know this is issue #17! I can do math! There was a Zero Issue, remember!?

Hmm. This actually gives Issue #1 some context.

If Carter Hall's personality is affected by the change into Hawkman, he may have been trying to destroy the armor because he was afraid of what he was becoming. Perhaps when he first escaped to Earth, he took on a human persona to try to escape paying for his "crimes" on Thanagar. It's possible he even used some kind of technology to forget his real identity of Katar Hol. But the Nth metal was slowly drawing out his real identity every time he wore it, possibly making him angrier and angrier. Perhaps he killed someone the night before he tried to burn the suit! Desperate and afraid, he drove out to the forest, drunk and scared. He burned the suit hoping to be rid of the confusion it engendered in him. Instead he and the suit became one! Ever since then, his memories were beginning to come back. He began investigating the Nth metal to try and combine the disparate wisps of memory floating to the surface of his mind. While doing so, he must have dropped clues at libraries and research centers that were picked up on by mercenaries like Xerxes who were searching for the mysterious Nth metal. His encounter with Xerxes alerted even more people like Pike who was searching for him because of his crimes on Thanagar. And then when he encountered Shayera, his memories completely came back and he realized how he had been living a false life. It kind of falls apart after that when he lets Shayera go and then begins hunting her again. But maybe he didn't realize he had a bunch of questions he wanted to ask until after he sent her off into space. L'esprit de l'escalier, sort of. In a way.

Now that The Savage Hawkman makes sense, maybe it'll be entertaining! And if Tom DeFalco didn't mean for all the stuff in that last paragraph to be true, I'm giving it to him for free so that he can use it to make it all true, no questions asked!

The Nth metal leads Hawkman to the deal going bad between Xerxes and the gang leader. Shadow Thief is also there for an as yet unknown reason. But when Hawkman begins battling Ironsides, I learn his true identity!

Yes! It is Tic Tac Foe! See the X and O on his back?! I think the best Tic Tac Foe can hope for is a Cat's Game.

During the fight, Shadow Thief reveals that she fights extraterrestrial threats. While Hawkman was alone and flying to the fight, he also declared to himself that he has sworn to protect his adopted world from all threats terrestrial and galactic. So I think he and Shadow Thief are going to get along and hunt monsters and no-goodniks just like Amanda Waller reported to Steve Trevor in Justice League of America. Boom! Hawkman rebooted!

Because Xerxes primed one of the Thanagarian bombs, he tosses it amidst some others and escapes with Tic Tac Foe. Shadow Thief and Hawkman disappear into whatever Shadow Realm Shadow Thief utilizes to move about secretly as the gang member's yacht explodes.

The Savage Hawkman #17 Rating: +1 Ranking. This comic book still wasn't very good. But it's so much better than it was! And it actually reboots Hawkman logically where I can Fanboy Rationalize the rest of the series into fitting into this new version of Hawkman. Plus raising it one Rank isn't going to do anything because that raises it to Spot #51 with no comic book beneath it. That slot will be filled by Constantine this month and I really don't think it's going to debut at #52! So, enjoy a non #52 Ranking for as long as it lasts, Hawkman!