Swamp Thing #16

Swamp Thing meet Womanbatgirl.

While Animal Man has built up a mighty army over in his Rotworld: The Red Kingdom half of this story, Swamp Thing has only managed to lose everybody in his group. Maybe that's a good thing because now he'll have time alone in the Batcave to develop a romance with Womanbatgirl. Normally I wouldn't advocate mammal/plant relationships because I was raised as a fear-mongering bigot that can't accept a plant fucking an animal. But Swamp Thing was bitten by Rabid Rot Batman, so he's probably going to turn into a Werebatplant any second now. I don't think Baby Jesus would frown on that relationship.

Come to think of it, does Baby Jesus even exist in The New 52? Oh yeah! He was in an issue of Blue Beetle as a picture on a wall. By seeing that picture, the Reach Scarab inside Jamie Reyes suddenly understood self-sacrifice and was then okay with Jamie's suicidal plans. And I guess the whole origin of The Phantom Stranger hinges on Jesus having been an actual person in The New 52. But I still have to wonder how DC rebooted him! What was his origin in this universe? What were his powers? Is he friends with the Greek Gods from Wonder Woman? Is he more believable than the one in our universe?

Back to Swamp Thing and his lack of an army, all he needs to do is find twelve year old Damian Wayne alive and his group will be more powerful than Animal Man's. Maybe not more powerful but definitely angrier. But whatever happened in Gotham must have to stay in Gotham because this comic book begins with Swamp Thing trudging up to Arcane's back door all by himself.

Swamp Thing versus Superman and the Suicide Squad and The Birds of Prey! Let's hope he has a surprise Bat-army following him up. Everyone can always use a surprise Bat-army.

Of course the scene shifts to six days earlier where Babs Gordon shows Swamp Thing a recording of Half-Rot Batman made specifically for Alec Holland. Because Batman prepares for every eventuality, especially the eventuality that usually happens. Or maybe it was just a lucky guess that Swamp Thing would wander into Gotham looking for him. Except I think maybe it was Poison Ivy who told Swamp Thing that Batman was working on something he could use. I forget how the plan was put together because I read too many fucking comic books and can't keep anything straight anymore. Anyway, Batman made something for Alec to use against Arcane. Or maybe to use against Rot Superman since at least three quarters of Batman's projects have to do with putting down Superman if he should ever turn away from justice.

Barbara Gordon leads the Swamp Thing to New Gotham which is, of course, in Arkham Asylum (isn't it always the way in alternate timelines?).

A monster climbs out of the sewers into your refuge and nobody shoots him in the face with a shotgun?

Batman was working on creating a huge batch of Alec Holland's bio-restorative formula. Swamp Thing finishes up Batman's work, making it as aggressive as possible. So now Swamp Thing has a shit-ton of Miracle-Gro to back him up. Swamp Thing also remarks that Batman left a special chemical that the Swamp Thing is going to try to incorporate into the formula. If you've been paying attention to what I've been saying about Batman, you already know what I'm guessing the chemical is: Kryptonite. While Swamp Thing is finalizing Batman's version of his bio-restorative formula, Arkham Asylum comes under attack.

The invasion force includes Giganta, Commissioner Gordon, and, I believe, Clayface.

As Arkham begins to fall, Swamp Thing finishes filling the container beneath the chamber he and Babs are currently in. But it's not just a chamber, Swamp Thing says. So he must be filling a person full of this bio-restorative formula. Plastic Man was my first thought because that would just be so frickin' cool. He's probably Rot-proof, right? But I can't picture Plastic Man being introduced to The New 52 this way. Perhaps Metamorpho since he was a member of Batman, Incorporated? How about I stop guessing and keep reading to find out?!

But before I find out, a quick recap on Abby Arcane in the past: she's failing miserably.

Okay! Back to the action! As Swamp Thing approaches Rot Superman and Rot Suicide Squad and Rot Turds of Prey, he unleashes his secret weapon full of green growing goodness!

Of course it's a Bat-bot! Plastic Man is too full of ADHD to sit in a chamber waiting for someone to pump him full of plant nutrients.

But it's not just a Bat-bot! Swamp Thing also has his Bat-army!

Including Mr. Freeze, Killer Croc, and The Floronic Man (not pictured).

For himself, Swamp Thing strapped Bane's venom delivery device to his back so it could pump the bio-restorative formula directly into him for added strength and, probably, a bit of a kryptonite touch!

And I guess we should check in on Abby Arcane before I wrap this up.

Whoops!

Swamp Thing #16 Rating: +2 Ranking. While Animal Man's fourth part was simply the heroes getting from Point A to Point B while picking up a new companion and defeating a mediocre enemy, Swamp Thing's fourth part was an epic tale of survival and rebellion. I love the panel with what is essentially the last of the human race charging Rot Superman and his Rot Army with little more than squirt guns filled with plant nutrients. I really hope the end of this crossover lives up to the journey!